Don't say that!
@Dedgurlsingstheblus (233)
United States
February 12, 2010 9:43am CST
I have been thinking about past relationship issues I have discussed with people here on mylot and it made me think about phrases that make us defensive when lovers or friends say them to us. What's the one thing that a lover should never say to you? If you and your guy or gal talk about everything, is there a way that they can bring up a subject that would really upset you? Have you ever said something to someone and it ruined your relationship?
2 responses
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
12 Feb 10
Relationship is very relevant to talk with because this will affect every lovers, husband and wife...
For me; what I don't like to talk is about the past relationship. I don't like to think about the past and I want talk about the future and plan something relevant because past should be buried and must forget avoid any misunderstanding...
I never said something to ruined a relationship but saying something to make the relationship to be strong enough...
@Dedgurlsingstheblus (233)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Hey aerous,
On the one hand I understand that it is important to look to the future, but I think sometimes we must discuss the past in order to not make the same mistakes. As for me, I am pretty sure that I have said some things that ruined a relationship. I don't regret these things, however, because I told the truth, and I didn't do it to be hurtful.
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
16 Feb 10
I appreciate and respect your stand, my friend. That's really a good thing. That's a great thing to say things to your partner but I think that must be telling only once not always...
For me I like that kind of person that no hiding anything said what she is experince in the past relationship and appreciate that but if telling it always I don't it is good...
I have a bad experience in a relationship and I think looking back in the past is not good enough to talk...
You know, I appreciate how you express yourself in a relationship. I like what your stand for. You really that great, my friend!!!
@Dedgurlsingstheblus (233)
• United States
17 Feb 10
You're right aerous,
If you keep bringing up the past it can be bad. It can seem like you are living in the past and not with your current girlfriend or boyfriend. I don't dump the past on people I am only open when they ask, or when the past is messing with the present relationship.
@yresh12 (3212)
• Philippines
14 Feb 10
TELLING THE TRUTH. That's what most people are afraid of...
I think that is the reason why that relationships don't work...
You promised to take care of each other but then you really
keep secrets that your partner should.
My partner should be able to say thing about anything even if
it could hurt me or not.I don't want to be lied to. ^^,
@Dedgurlsingstheblus (233)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Hey yresh12,
I agree. I think generally people are afraid of the truth, both hearing it and telling it. Like you, I would rather get my feelings hurt than to not trust the other person to be honest with me.
@Dedgurlsingstheblus (233)
• United States
17 Feb 10
I think the fact that truth telling is not just one way is the problem when it comes to people. There have been so many times when I have been the honest one, and the other person was too scared to be.
