I Think My Next Door Neighbor Is Starving Herself or Very Sick....
By dgtempe1
@dgtempe1 (87)
United States
February 13, 2010 9:09pm CST
I just saw my next door neighbor she lives by herself. She is so skinny you can see right thru her!! Not only that but her hair is all falling off... Just two months ago she was at a normal weight and looked healthy. I asked her if she had been eating and she said yes. I dont believe her, so i went home and made her a quick Macaroni & Cheese and brought it over.
She never ever would go to a doctor, so i know she's not getting any radiation treatments or anything that would make her hair fall off.
I dont know what to do except for check on her more often and try to feed her sometimes?
What would you do? I feel terrible about this.
2 people like this
11 responses
@jb78000 (15139)
•
14 Feb 10
i opened this discussion to say what vonmac said in box one. she may or may not be starving herself but this sounds like an emergency and time to let professionals decide what to do. i know you probably feel like you don't want to intrude or cause trouble but this sounds urgent - if she is that thin and won't go to the doctor she could die.
@dgtempe1 (87)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Thank you to everyone responding. Yes, i will take care of her as best as i can, she's always been child like, and can get very upset very fast... I have to be careful because if she gets angry at me, she wont open the door. As it is, i am the only one she will open the door for.
I'm going to watch her and bring her food and follow all the suggestions here, and try to figure out what this is all about.
I may call her brother very soon.
I will keep you all posted.
Thank you all so much, again
@dgtempe1 (87)
• United States
16 Feb 10
I did call SS. I had to because i called her brother and he flat out told me he had washed his hands of her!!!
They are going to go look at her food supply and question her. i'm assuming they will do that immediatly. I hope its today!
They have to tell her they received a concerned call, but they do not have to divulge my name. I'm only doing it for her own good, i dont like to mind others' business, but i cant see her going on like this.
They need to get to the bottom of this even if she suspects me or my husband!
Thank you for all your good advise.
Again, i will keep you posted.
@chocolatelle (277)
• Philippines
14 Feb 10
She's in the case of ANOREXIA. i'm thinking her hair is falling off because her body's not receving enough iron. iron can make your hair look good and shiny. as a friendly neighbor, and don't believe that she's visiting the doctor, offer yourself and accompany her for a check up. if you're bringing food to her.. try observing how she eats and if she wants to go to the bathroom.. time her because if it exceeds in 30 mins she might be vomiting the food she ate. and try to do daily weighs on her.. just remember to weigh her wearing the same clothes with pockets (she can put things in it to make her gain weight) on the same time.
@dgtempe1 (87)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Yes, i hear they can get real crafty with this disease. That's a good idea about the pockets- i will check them!
I do care very much for her, she's someone who can come over here at 3 in the morning and she knows she's welcome. And I can do the same with her. One night she was scared, and i let her sleep here. I didnt see her for a few weeks because i had been sick with the flu and other things, and i hate walking even next door in all the ice. And i saw this drastic change in her that just broke my heart.
Thank you.
@chocolatelle (277)
• Philippines
14 Feb 10
i think that anorexia is not a disease but a personality disorder.
you're a very nice neighbor indeed. good thing she have you as a neighbor or she'll get worse. i saw another post from your topic that says refer her to some service/support thing.. you should do that too. these people can help her be on the right track. goodluck and may god bless the both of you.
@fifileigh (3615)
• United States
22 Apr 10
maybe she is literally sick, like aids, cancer, and she knows she is dying and she cant do anything about it but just waste away until she goes. if anything, she probably just needs a friend to spend time with her and make her feel like someone cares so that she doesnt die alone, all of the sudden when u least expect.
maybe take her out and go to movie, mall or hang out in a cafe. i am sure she probably gets cold easily, even if it is warm out.
@LaDeBoheme (2004)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Sounds like anorexia or bulimia. If so, you're right, she is starving herself and yes, her hair will fall out. She may be telling you she's eating, but bulimics force themselves to vomit the food back up.
She could be refusing to go to the doctor because she's in denial of having an eating disorder. You cannot force her to go, but maybe you can gently confront her about your worries. See if she eats in front of you and what she does immediately after -- go to the bathroom? Nibble a few bites? Does she have family that you know of? Perhaps, you can express your concerns to one of them?
@LaDeBoheme (2004)
• United States
14 Feb 10
dgtempe, I suffered from bulimia for years. I think it is time to call her brother.
@jjquiroz7 (86)
• Philippines
14 Feb 10
Woah, that's bad!
It's either she has an eating disorder or she just doesnt get the right nutrition from the food she eats.
that hair-falling-out sign is a bad thing. it really means malnutrition.
does she have friends? maybe it could help if you can invite her over to your house to eat or something.
well, it's a good thing that you gave her some mac and cheese.
hope her condition doesnt worsen.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
20 Feb 10
dgtempe1 If she was healthy just two months ago then she may have lost her income, or just plain ran out of money, and is too proud to seek help. I would report her to social services and see if they can help her to at least get food stamps if nothing else. She must indeed be having some sort of financial or physical problems. If she is anorexic that would also make her hair fall out and make her look like a starving person from a concentration camp. she definably needs help.Do you know
if she has any relatives? If so see if you can get them to help her.
@cream97 (29086)
• United States
8 Apr 10
Hi, dgtempe1. This is horrible! I would get into contact with a trusted doctor and I would explain her symptoms to him/her. She may be ill with a condition of some sort. Or bulimic?? A doctor could tell her exactly what is wrong with her. She needs to see a doctor so that she can get treated for whatever is wrong with her. I hope that it is not that serious. She does not want to wait too long, it may make her condition far worse. She needs to see a doctor, whether she wants to or not. Her life may be depending on this!
@LaurenInLA (2270)
• United States
14 Feb 10
Are you sure that she's not sick? Is there a family member that you could talk to? What you describe sounds like classic anorexia. She needs some serious help right away. If it isn't possible to talk to a family member, I would recommend that you contact Adult Protective Services. This poor woman needs help.
@atv818 (1980)
• United Arab Emirates
14 Feb 10
If she is a close friend, tell her that if she is dieting, she still has to drink her vitamins. Otherwise, she'll get very sick. Falling of hair means that there is no sufficient nutrients to support hair growth. Hair is very thin so if that cannot be sustained, how about the rest of her body? That is very serious. If she won't listen, tell her immediate family before it's too late.
@Ynodhady (95)
• Indonesia
26 Mar 10
i will give some Opinion of what will i do if i see someone who have the Same situation as U experience. I wiLL try to contact Any her Family,nearer cousin. u can Gather any Ur neighbor Else around ur House and u say to them that there is someone that verY need our HeLp and u get Hurry up to gather The Donation of Some Money Just For her....
