How would you feel?

I would feel exactly the same way you do. If someone has mistreated me or my relatives in the past I would not let them do it agian in the near future. so once a person looses my trust I wont' give them a second chance. I dont believe in second chances much. People should be wary of their behaviour in the first place.

I think if your mother is able to forgive and forget, you should too. Not for yourself, but for your mom. Obviously this woman means a lot to your mom. It cost you nothing to be civil.

If I were you, I would actually go and meet this woman again, for your mother's sake. She may be being blinded by the wiles of this woman, and maybe just a little lonely for friendship; if so, she will need a voice of reason to help here to avoid the same pitfalls that she fell into before. If not, the abuse may start all over again, and you will have to deal with the effects on your mother. So don't look at it like you are associating yourself with this woman, look at it as you protecting your mother from herself.

Facebook is a very easy way to contact old friends if they are on there. One of my friends has made friends with people that are strangers to him. Some people change for the better and it is possible that your mom's old friend has changed into a nicer person. On the other hand it is possible that she might be like she used to be. Maybe your mom should just do messaging to her on Face Book for one to two years. Then she could assess if she thinks this lady is a better person. If I was in that same situation as your mom I would be careful and do messaging on Face Book. I would not give out details of where I live to her if I was in that situation. Good luck to your mom after rekindling their friendship.

Amen, I would feel the same way. I think as much as my mother wants to hang out with someone just don't include me if it's someone who has mistreated her. I'll be polite but will not say much as I know that it's better that way. I feel if my mother has someone who is influencing her in a negative way or even has mistreated her, I would tell her to don't go out much with the person. Fine be friends but please don't invite that person over unless it's together with other friends. Also for her to be careful and not get stepped on. People may change but some things still remains the same.

I will for sure, feel the same way as you do to that friend of your mom. But I guess, you have to have a heart to heart talk with your mom first of the circumstances in the past why she could bear all the mistreatment that her friend has given to your mom. In that way, you may understand your mom's character better and will help you have a wider understanding of the attitude of your mom's friend. After the talk, it would be wise to meet this friend of your mom to have a closer analysis between your impression and your mom's statement of her friend's character. Dwelling on your anger may not help in making a better person having a wide understanding of other people's character. Taking time to talk and think more will be your best tool to come up with the best in whatever you do or say. God is waiting for us to call Him, maybe, He can be the best source of patience and wisdom to deal with your problem regarding your mom's friend. You may become an instrument to change your mom's friend for the better.