Should two people of different religions marry?

The couple I speak of is having problems, they are unhappy because his religion has rules that she cant seem to understand and she thinks it is wrong not to believe in Jesus, to put limitations on her personal being and to be made to feel that she is stupid. She has pointed out that in his Koran it has some very real differences which she is unhappy with. He on the other hand feels that Christian women are far too outspoken, that the wife of a muslem man should be quiet, beautiful and obedient at all times. She is also upset because they have very different ideas about children, keeping a home, how to eat food, and where she should be allowed to go by herself. Having been raised Christian in the United States she was raised to teach the Word in Sunday School, he thinks this is an abomination. She wears her hair out and always has and he is severly iritated when she goes out uncovered. They have these arguements all the time especially when their parents come to visit. I see their point.

wow, now I understand you! The Muslims are very strict in their religion, and that's why I don't like it really They must follow so many rules, and this religion is rather a force than becoming calm and faithful

The issue is not that they follow different religions. That's a matter than can be negotiated before a marriage. The issue is that he sees her as "the wife of a Muslim[1] man" and not as "a Christian woman." If they were of the same religion, they'd still be having problems because he doesn't see her as a person in her own right, but as an appendage. No religion has a monopoly on that. [1] Note capitalization.

well said!

But do you believe True Love is governed by Principles? I mean Moral Principles that involve religion...

Yes I do, True love is a place you get too, not a today emotion. I truly love my husband because he is a good man, a great provider, an awesome lover (for me), a great father, and we share common interests (ie religion). It was not instantaneous like some people think, I grew to love him and to respect and believe he was right for me. Though the sentiment that you wrote is well said. It leaves out the things that man is used to. You have other considerations like family, children, livelihoods and numerous other things. I would not marry a man that my family was too strongly against because it would cause a war within my very close family. I needed for my husband ( who is my second husband) to understand, respect and be a good role model for my children. Because together we have so many children we both needed a livelihood that brought us good incomes. and we needed to share common interests such as our religion which has common rules for child rearing, relations with your husband or wife, how the woman is to be treated in the marriage, and your responsibilites. In some other religions those expectations are clearly different and what woman wants that. That is why marriage is so hard for some is because they go against these particular principles.

Agreed in a way. These are my long time friends, they respected each others religion before marriage. It was quite easy to be friends when discussions about your religion were not a part of the equation. However once they were married the situation changed, now husband and wife, he wanted his wife to live the muslem way and she wanted her husband to be more Christian. But I agree more communication may have solved the problem. However, I do know a couple who did discuss all the problems associated with being different religions, and they did not have any problems until children came along and they each decided to raise thier children by thier own religion.

pastorbarend (1693) What I can understand is the issue of love when it comes to different religions which married couples are faced with. It is clear when using the Bible as a guide that God is a jealous God and want to be serve alone. What I would like to know is how can the one believe that Jesus Christ has been baptised (immerse) and the other one believe that although I am a Christian, I believe in the Orthodox way of sprinkling. I have tried for 22 years and see that to serve God in spirit and in truth, you need to do God's will and until now me and my wife still differs on the issue of serving God the proper way. I am called to be an evangelist but based on the differences in religion in my marriage I cannot do the will of God and bear in mind the agreement was that we will not stand in wants way but today the wife wants to say more as to how I need to serve God and how need fulfill my calling. This situation is causing also confusing to our kids, aged 19 and 15. Then one start to question God is this really want He wants for one.

Love may not know it but marriage does. I always hear people speak of what love knows (no offense here) however marriage knows all these things. I love my husband and I think he is the most wonderful man in the world, but there are numerous things I disagree with, however our religion is not one of them, our child rearing preferences is not one of them and our goals for the future is not one of them. However if they were, he would not have been my husband long. One of the reasons marriages work (to me) is because you love and respect each other and because you respect (and in most cases, agree with) the other persons values. If they are a devout budhist and you are a devout Christian, love may not know it but you do. You know that his religion is not the same as you. You know that he now is intent on teaching what you consider crazy to your children. If you are the guy, you know that and you are muslem and she is Christian, you know that other men will see her hair in public, which should be seen by only you. You know she will not pray to Allah, you know she will not be quiet, walk three steps behind you and be obedient and never question you. You also know that she will not raise your son the way you want her too. However I do agree that love does not know all those things, but love alone does not make a marriage.

Maybe so...However, I think that the things that were instilled in them may have had the most to do with them. They were raised in their respective religions and have only known them. While they clearly loved each other the complete change was too much for their relationship.

I also feel that your religion should be the same or at the very least have the same basic principals. My husband and I are both Christiands, he is Penicostal and I am Evangelical, which means we are just about the same thing with very minor differences. Therefore we have the same principles as each other and thus have similar ideals when it comes to the running of our home, how I should act, how our children should be raised and what Bible and lessons are taught and learned in our home, which leads to a stronger lasting relation built on mutual religious trust and individual trust over all.

Little thing here is that the major principles of the two religions are the same. It is easy for two religions steeped in the Jewish concept to get along. Jesus was a Jew and then his life brought Christianity (Catholic) not really a big difference, but when your religion is completely different you will soon find that life does not work out for you and your spouse.

absolutely!!!!!

However they were unprepared for the fact that they both would have to give up aspects of their religion that they so vehemently believed see thats why I'm not really fond of religion...People tend to believe in such a rigid fashion it really can damage their lives which is a shame..I'm the type of person who feels we should be bendable ya know..to me personally they could both sway more in their beliefs WITHOUT necessarily giving any aspect up and to me thats how it should be especially when it comes to truly loving someone..Thats just me though yaknow..

I disagree in that I have a strong Christian belief and it has only made my life better, however I dont have any disagreements with my husband because we are the same religion and we believe the same thing. Therefore we dont have a problem as this because it only makes each other stronger. We are also not confused about what religion to choose to teach our children because our belief again is the same.

First of all they were married for a while, and yes the issue was married long before they were married. They thought they could overcome religious differences because they were in love and they thought that love conquered all things. However they were unprepared for the fact that they both would have to give up aspects of their religion that they so vehemently believed. That is what happened to them.

I agree completely, how complicated that would be to have to decide that half your children are muslim and half Christian.

That is somewhat better. I mean if such a couple has an even number of children, and half of them are raised as Christians and half the number as Muslims, it is just about OK. Think of the sitaution with an odd number of children! It will then become a power struggle and insinuations and counter-insinuations. Worse still would be each child is half-Christian and half-Muslim in their living styles! They are neither here nor there. Now is the problem within Abrahamic Religions where at least there is some basis to search for commonality. Thin of a mix-up like Buddist and Muslim or some very incompatible religions like Hinduism and Islam. On the very face of it the Hindu idolatry is anathems, why blasphemy to the Muslim. And man no one knows for sure what God wants? All our assertions are merely re-statements of Scriptural Words! In some remote future, just as in these days a lot of Fusion Music is being created, and enjoyed by many too, if only Fusion religion could be created to become a kind of ONE RELIGION concept, then there could really tbe much needed common ground that need not be treated as a conquest. It is not that such ideas were never attempted. You have Sikhism a kind of fusion of Hunduism and Islam, you have the Baha-i- Faith a fusion of several religions, and Akbar the Great's Din-i-Ilahi. How many of them succeeded? There were always a handful of adherents, and either that religion continued to be a "curiosity" or a minority. Hence I feel what is the best course of action is for everyone to learn as much as possible about other religions only to see how much common ground is there and to eliminate Religious strife. Marriage is not the only way to bind people together.

I would think that two people who love each other would take the time to get the religious aspect of their relationship analysed to see if there is something that would not work for them, however love is blind and the heart wants what it wants and may overlook what is an obviously a problem. therefore religion is still in the background of a relationship that started only with love and love is not enough for a marriage, there must also be several factors with love being the most important of them.

Wow! Thank you, what you said was deeply profound and I enjoyed it tremendously. Thank you

While overall this is by far the best of my responses so far, here is the thing, being a different religion when you are both devout is easier to overlook when you first get married, even when you talk about it. Most people will discuss it and think that love will keep them together because they think that love will conquer all. Then after being married for a little while, small things will start to bother you, such as the 5 prayers a day, or the fact that a Muslim man will want to have a wife who walks behind him or keep her hair covered. The Muslim man had a life before you and the pressure of hearing his brothers, mother, father and those he loves as much as he loves her, are asking how can she disrespect the family by showing up in our house with her hair uncovered and those things will start the break down of the marriage. Another thing is when you are a Christian woman and you have spent your whole life spreading the word of God and suddenly your husband you love tells you this is not appropriate because you have to have conversation with other men, which he feels with his whole heart is wrong, you learn quickly you dont like this. So what do you do. You get angry because he wants you to go to Mosque with other Muslims because his wife should be by his side and you cant because you must go to church, some of these are reasons.

You too God Bless.

thanks pastorkayte..conflict between religions sometimes break good relationships, not only marriage, but also friendships, companionship and more..I am Christian, but what makes me busy this time is learning Islam....I have been discussing about Islam with some of myLot friends..I am also visiting Islamic websites..I believe that this can help me avoid disagreement with any Muslim I meet..If I'm in the middle of confusion, I don't really worry..I always refer to James 1:5-6 of the Bible..God bless.

Yes but a divorce can happen because you have differences, religion is just one of them. Love is one of the best gifts you can give someone, and when you fall in love with someone you think you are above all things and can make it work, but sometimes these things hurt the marriage. An example, I love my husband with all my heart but he is not the best with money, and I am. I have since taken over family finances but he thinks that is a mans job. This was something we had to come to terms with and it was not easy. We did learn how to compromise however it affected our relationship for a long time. The same thing happens when you speak of religion. It may need compromise but it affects your marriage anyway.

Again I agree with you thank you.

well I agree with you but my point is this all things has been misunderstood and portrayed in wroong way it means all this terms has taken a shape of term called "EGO" this is the root cause of all such differences this need to be consider and wiped off. People should start thinking as WE not as I