I have a friend Problem!
By sxrxnrr45601
@sxrxnrr45601 (1171)
United States
February 25, 2010 11:46am CST
I have a friend of mine that I have been friends with for like 15 years! Now about 6 months ago we had a big falling out and I do mean big. Well yesterday while I was sitting at work she called. She had heard through my brother that My father had surgery and just called to check on me and him. Know how much my father means to me. Now I really liked hearing form her. Although my b/f dont like her and he has all right not to because of the circumstances that had made me and her stop talking in the frist place. Now today she calls me and is like hey when you get off work and I tell her well she all like you want to come out. Well for one she lives out in the country for another I dont drive so I would have to rely on her for a ride and for another she wants me to spend the night. Now I understand you go visit friends sometimes and spend the night but even before we stopped talking it was always me going to her house and spending the night. There is nothing wrong with that. But, man I am 33 years old and I want to be at home and sleep in my bed next to my man. And not have to sleep on a couch or the floor. And really she is just acting like nothing ever happend. Like I was in the wrong and she is forgiving me. That is not the case for one I never done anything to her. For another she is the one that called the cops on my b/f for something that was her b/f ideal so... Why should I just act like happend. Now I dont mind talking to her on the phone in such but I am really to old for over the night drunk parties when I work 54 hours a week. and go to school. my question is how do I tell her that I dont want to come spend the night withour her being all mad about it.
4 responses
@rosegardens (3034)
• United States
26 Feb 10
Perhaps you need to explain to her that you cannot stay overnight because you are really pressed for time. School takes an awful lot out of someone emotionally, mentally and physically plus you have to work more than a forty hour week and that too can be draining.
Maybe thank her for being considerate to take you to her home and have you as an overnight guest, but perhaps instead if she would not mind, invite her to your home for a couple of hours. Then you can go to bed whenever you get tired. :D Of course you would need to clear it with your bf first.............
If she gets angry with you because you don't want to stay the night at her house, then it's her problem and not yours. She has to deal with it, not you. You are trying to do the best for yourself right now, you need your rest and there is nothing wrong with that.
1 person likes this
@sxrxnrr45601 (1171)
• United States
26 Feb 10
Yeah, she sure did get all mad at me. But, o well like you said thats her problem. lol Thanks for the advise.
@rosegardens (3034)
• United States
26 Feb 10
O, she got angry with you for that. Well there is nothing can be done then.
Happy Mylotting!
@syankee525 (6261)
• United States
26 Feb 10
just be honest for real. that is the only way to be instead of beating around the bush. tell her that you're not into the whole party sene no more. and with work and school you're just tried to go out.
but sometime when people dont even say sorry and call out of the blue, you shouldnt worry about what happen in the pass. and hope your b/f understand you two been friends for along time.
ok here one for you, my best friend from school who lost her husband and she have medical issues as well, three boys who also have mental issues. well we went to see her and i took her car filled it up with gas, then i lended her like $300 and then after that she stopped talking to us, went to another state to live.
well last night we went to her son veiwing and its like ok the whole money this is over with, my wife and her been friends since high school. we just wanted to be there, and she was very surpise to see us and broke down to us.. she said sorry i was dont worry about it,
1 person likes this
@sxrxnrr45601 (1171)
• United States
26 Feb 10
Well that pretty cool of you and your wife. I have already made my decision though. She stoped in to my work yesterday and I told her the turth that I really dint feel like comeing to her house and spending the night. And as I suspected she got really mad. You know she is just one of those friends that I feel I would be better off being friends at a distance. I dont have drama in my life and just the short time she was around yesterday there was all kinds of drama. I just to old for it and. I think I would be better off no hanging out with her
@choybel (5042)
• Philippines
25 Feb 10
You could thank her for the offer and then explain to her nicely why you couldn't go this time. It's not like she could force you but if she does then you'll have more reason not to. Since she is your long time friend then I think yo know of a way to decline her offer without making you both feel bad about it, and I think she'll understand. Or you could lie and make out reasons and then maybe tell her how much you'd love to but really can't.But I prefer the truth over anything else.
1 person likes this
@sxrxnrr45601 (1171)
• United States
25 Feb 10
I must say I agree with you I defently prefer the truth I am not very good at lieing anyway! I love my friend but, she is one of these friends that it's hard to be her friend if that makes in sense to you. Like a few years back she borrowed 200 dollars from me and when it came time to pay be back she came up with an excuse as to why I really owed her the money and why she wasnt going to pay me back. Everytime I have asked her to borrow money it's been no! She is just really hard to be friends with.
@rebornishard (186)
• Indonesia
25 Feb 10
first, say sorry , after that you must tell the truth, whatever she hearing you or not, keep explaining, one day or someday she will hear what you said, and come to you :)
sincerely reborn is hard
@sxrxnrr45601 (1171)
• United States
25 Feb 10
There is nothing I feel I have to say sorry for! I have not done nothing to her. Anyway it already over with. I tried to explain to her that I just really dont want to spend the night and as always she got mad so... It's really not worth my time any more you should not have to work that hard to keep a friend any way!
