my child hate me or does he

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i let my ex have custody of my son when i divorced, and he is 12 now and his dad has been feeding him a bunch of bs, i try to be in his life but with the distance it kinda hard to see him especially when his family is pretty much tring to stop me from seeing him. i have two kids with him and got remarried 6 yeras ago and have my own family with my husband , and my ex hasn't been in my 9 years old daughter life her whole life and all of a sudden he wanted visitation, i took him to court and won sole physical and sole legal with no contact or visitation. i still try to keep contact with my oldest and haven't been able to get in contact until recently when he emailed me saying " leave us alone. i hate you for what you did to us." everyone say it not him saying that it my ex. how can i just forget about my son, what can i do everyone is saying let it be for right now he know your his mom and he knows how to get in to contact with you if he wants to.