Do you know a wolf in sheeps clothing?
By pandaeyes
@pandaeyes (2065)
March 2, 2010 7:33am CST
My husbands brother was a well liked man.
He was charming and friendly and his family loved him.
But there was something that turned me off him right from the first moment I met him...
He was a wolf in sheep's clothing.
What I mean is, he was a friendly smiling ,man on the outside ,but under his voice was the other him that you could hear when he spoke to us and you could see in his actions.
My husband always tried hard to get along with him and often it looked like it had worked but then something would prompt the wolf to leap out once again.
We had several undercover encounters with him over the years. By undercover, I mean he and my husband would agree about something and then he would make sure only he got the benefit of it .To outside appearances, the wolf brother had helped his younger brother.
Once there was jealousy over a car which resulted in my husband being wrestled to the ground .
My wolf brother in law was also a terrible bully and his wife suffered from bruises and even broken bones. We discovered the truth when her father told my husband that he was tired of the cover up and disclosed the extent of the bullying to us. No one else in his family knew except his parents.
Last year the wolf met his demise in a traffic accident.
Everyone was sad about it and there were many nice things said about him.
But deep down inside I shall always remember him as the wolf in sheep's clothing.
Do you know anyone who is one thing to the outside world, and quite another person in private?
5 people like this
10 responses
@louisefrank (356)
•
3 Mar 10
I think many people are like this. My boyfriend before I met my husband was like that. He was charm personified in front of other people and everyone thought what a wonderful chap he was. At first he was charming with me too but he gradually became more and more bad-tempered and controlling. He was never physically abusive but there was mental abuse. I began to feel worthless and it wasn't until my sister gave me a stiff talking to that I realised that the problem was with him not me. One of the wonderful things about my husband is that he's the same at home as he is when he's out.
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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3 Mar 10
Well I'm glad you discovered the ex boyfriends real self in time to avoid him in future.
I often wonder if our wolf's widow feels like she has escaped or whether she really put up with Mr Hyde to get the mild mannered person he would be to the outside world.
In their photos, she always looks owned,a sort of trophy to hold out.
@louisefrank (356)
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4 Mar 10
"She always looks owned, a sort of trophy to hold out." That's a very astute observation and really sums up the whole problem.
1 person likes this
@ronaldinu (12422)
• Malta
3 Mar 10
I have known a wolf in a sheeps clothing. I met a friend through my hobby. We became best friends. He is a sweet talker. He offered to help me in my hobby and he appeared to be an angel. Later on I discovered that he is an angel in disguise. I discovered that he physically abused his wife, when she does not agree with him. He was even abusive (verbally) towards his children. We cut all ties when he started to be abusive towards me that was the end of it.
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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3 Mar 10
Good for you! I wouldn't have anything to do with a person like that either.
Our person was a relative of course so we had to interact with him once in a while but only when absolutely necessary.
We have seen his family more times in the year since his demise than in the whole of the rest of our marriage.
@jwfarrimond (4473)
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2 Mar 10
Yes I've quite often met people who will be all smiles and nice words to your face, but then do the opposite behind your back. I was driven out of a good job by such a person spreading lies about me to the boss while at the same time he was as nice as pie to my face. Of course, I knew what was going on, but the damage had already been done.
That apart, I'd think that the description would fit any politician that you care to think of. They'll promice you the earth if they think that it'll get them elected, but once they are, then the mask falls.
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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2 Mar 10
That's true.
One of the people in our road was trying for the local elections and he was doing very well.
Then it was found that when he wasn't doing his campaigning ,he was selling insurance ,well taking the money from people who thought they had bought insurance from him but using it to pay his mortgage.
The news ruined his political chances.
A few months later it was discovered that his wife also worked and that she had been claiming housing allowance because she didn't think she was earning enough and thought they were entitled to it.
So that led to his name being dug up all over again.
I do wonder though, if thy hadn't discovered the first misdemeanor,whether his becoming a politician would have meant he could hush up the second one.
@chenxiaoyue_713 (2165)
• China
2 Mar 10
There are many people like your wolf brother who is in fact a mean wolf in sheep clothing. They appear kind and friendly on the outside, but it's just a hypocritical mask under which their true evils are hidden. It's really hard to cope with such people, especially if the other side are really good and kind people. These good people are often cheated by the wolves. I've met such people too, and my way of dealing with them is to be pretty cautious lest i may fall into their traps. And i will disclose them at the right time, letting them know that i won't easily be deceived.
1 person likes this
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
3 Mar 10
Hi pandaeyes~ There are alot of people like that in this world
and they say that those kind of people always get their do!
And, I guess in this case "the wolf" did get his! God does
work in mysterious ways! I guess he found a way to make "the wolf"
pay for his sins! Just when I thing I no longer believe in God
he oes do the right thing and make things work out! Maybe, this
time he did the right thing and made him pay! Just think of
it that way! And now your family can rest easier now that
this "wolf" is gone!
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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3 Mar 10
I thought that same thing.
It is amazing how long this mans influence prevails now he is gone.
I noticed that even their photographs are all of posed scenarios depicting happiness and success.I know that most people do pose for pictures but this isn't the person we knew in them, this is the ideal man.
@MagicalBubbles (5103)
• Canada
2 Mar 10
Hello Pandaeyes!! So sorry you had to put up with such a person.
Yes Ive known lots and lots of them. I think Ive encountered at least once at every job I had. Not sure why, but theres always one!!!
Also had 2 of them in my family. Lucky for me, my parents knew and would keep me away from them.
There was also my ex, he tried to hurt me once but I guess my reaction wasnt what he expected.....I left him 6 months after we were married. Didnt want to live with that type of man. And I too was made the bad one, poor him..blah blah.....I didnt even bother to set the record straight.
You can also find them online. They think they can hide but you can always feel their true colors!!
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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3 Mar 10
Wow you sound like quite a strong minded person.
I hope I would have done the same.
They can be so controlling.
This mans wife was almost helpless when he was gone.
She seemed unable to do any of the tasks he had adopted for himself.
He would take the kids to school and I think did the shopping.
He kept his bank account separate and she had a struggle to get it signed over to her,I think more a guilt struggle as she felt she was not 'allowed' to do certain things.
People of course saw it as his having been the loving caring husband but we had heard the way he spoke to her when he thought they were alone and it was awful.
@recycledgoth (9894)
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2 Mar 10
Your post brings back memories of my Uncle. To the outside world he was witty and urbane, smart and charismatic. To me and to my brother he was mean, nasty, bullying, arrogant and cruel. He had a viscious tongue and would frequently verbally abuse my brother for being clumsy, while I bore the brunt of his bad temper when I was *polite and ladylike*
I shed no tears for him when he passed
@cream97 (29087)
• United States
2 Mar 10
Hi, pandaeyes. Yes, I know many people that are like this. They pretend that they are all nice, but deep down inside they are as mean as a red bull! I have not seen anyone in action yet. But, I am pretty sure that I have. People these days have a good way of covering up themselves when they don't want others to see them for what they really are. All the mean things that your brother-in-law did just came back to bite him in the rear end. He should have treated others much better than he did when he was alive. It is sad that he will have to take every bad deed that he has done to others to the grave with him. This is a very a sad way for him to have lived his life..
1 person likes this
@CrimsonRain (336)
• United States
2 Mar 10
Yes. My former roommate is exactly like that. She's very beautiful physically and a lot of boys are attracted to her, thinking that she's as good as she looks. What they don't know is that this girl is disrespectful towards her mom. I always hear her shout at her mom on the phone. For me, she's just like a trophy, only good when someone's looking.
@pandaeyes (2065)
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2 Mar 10
Wow i like that description.
We had good looking girls at school who were quite unkind people.
One girl was quite portly and always very insistent when she wanted something I think teachers liked her determination but thy did not see to what lengths she would go to get her goals. One of my friends was goaded by her almost daily.
@quixotecybercafe (130)
• India
2 Mar 10
as per your title, my perception is quite positive, because i am looking everyday such type of persons because they are associated with our daily lives, and you will definitely get everywhere, either in corporate offices, businesses, neighbours anywhere, they are looking something descent but they are something else exactly, as it seems they are not
1 person likes this
@pandaeyes (2065)
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2 Mar 10
So you have seen quite a few 'wolves' !
I think the more we deal with people the more we see.
Quite an uncomfortable thought in one way.
I mean I really like people and would help anyone but not at my own peril.
However my husband would always help his brother because he asked him to even though he nearly always came back from the encounter worse off.
