what to look for in an arrange marriage..??

Greetings drdivu! I know many people here will tell you about how they disagree in an arranged marriage. I understand that if it is an arrange marriage its not optional, its part of your culture. Once I heard that the way a man treats his mother, is exactly how he will be with you in the future, I mean, when the honey moon period is over. Of course we don't take that for sure but it helps. If he disrespect her, answer bad to her, hurt her feelings, reject her food, all these things... Think about it. If he tells you positive things about her, respect her, admire her, and been good, its most likely he'll be that way with you. Also, look up for someone you have common interests with, like hobbies, kind of food, religion, social status. Because if you are a good match in those things you can avoid some big problems in the future. Tell your parents to investigate the most they can about the men they're thinking of. Well, I hope they make the right choice if your opinion doesn't count. And you are right, it sound weird to ask that! LOL. Have an excellent day here on mylot, Libna. Prepare yourself for getting married!

Do you agree with arranged marriage? No offense but if you will ask me personally, you should be the one to choose whom you are going to marry and not your parents. Your parents could suggest but you should be the one to give the final decision. First of all marriage is sacred. We get married for us to be totally committed to the person we LOVE. It is a sign and proof of LOVE by a couple. But if you do agree with it, what you should do is know him first. Do some background checking. Ask people who knows him about his habits, character etc. Spend some time with him also and get to know him personally. Then ask yourself, "Is he worth your love?" "Will I be happy with him?" "Can he take care of me?" "Will he love me truly?" Why think a thousand times? Because almost all arrange marriage fail. This is because they are a total and complete strangers to each other. Most of them cannot learn to love the other person. LOVE should really be there!

HI, Arrange married? Really? I never agree on arrange married before but if so then you have to get to know each other before you step in the married thing. First, you have to spend a lot of time to know this person both happiness and anger. Most of people hide their real face so well until they got loose in anger. find out if he is really a responsible person, who he cares the most and who he will turn to the most. to me, relationship is totally hard for me and I dont want to get involve again if I have a chance... I am telling you not easy. But each one of us have to get married in some how. So, I wish you all the best

it is very difficult to choose someone to marry you but as the tradition goes, parents still prefer to find the best of their opinion of someone .. please make sure you highlight to the 'would be' of certain things thay you consider you may want in your life, probably you want to further your studies or get a job ..othrwise you may never havw any of your dreams to come true .. be ure to communicate with this person prior to marriage as we the woman are far different than when our mothers time, we have become indipendent and want somethings for ourselves best of luck to you cheers

I think the most importent thing for any relation is that how much understanding your partner is. his nature must not be dominating. i think if he understands your self and not dominate you are really going to have good relation. last thing is the compromises from both side. i think there is nothing simple and easy if you dont ever compromise, but for some of the things you dont want but your partner wants and you do compromises you just bring the smile for him. and vice versa

In arranged marriage compatibility between guy and girls are checked. following things are generally checked while searching guy for one's daughter for marriage. 1) what the guy is doing for earning living? & How much he earns? 2) can he take responsibility of family after marriage? 3) Is his physics suitably matches with that of a girl? 4) Family Background 5) Social image about the boy and his family

Do you agree to an arranged marriage? I thought women in India will pick their own husbands these days. Maybe you have a career and are not willing to give it up as yet. I think your parents must have a pretty good idea what they are looking for. It will be a guy with comparable social standing (I know castes are officially no longer important, but yet they are). The guy will have to demonstrate that he can support a family. In a traditional arranged marriage you will be expected to move in with your in-laws, or is that no longer the case? You will likely have to stay home and be supervised by your mother-in-law to learn all the customs of that family. Your parents will also be looking for a guy whose family will be satisfied with the dowry that is offered by your family. I take it the dowry system still exists in India. You want to be absolutely sure that you agree with all the terms of an arranged marriage. Check the statistics in India. Every year a number of newly married brides die accidentally by fire in their in-laws house supposedly because the dowry was not enough or because after a suitable time the berieved husband can look for a new arranged marriage with a new dowry. I don't want to sound negative, but you seem to be a smart young woman so I trust you will think really hard about this system of arranged marriages. In any case I wish you the best for your future.

If you have agreed to go along with the arrange marriage, then you are taking a big risk, marriage is not what anyone can arrange for you, it has to be your own choice because remember it is for better for worse. you should be the one to choose the person you will be spending the rest of your life with-for better for worse.

i dot think an arrange marriage is good as perhaps there will only be arguments always. its still nice if both of you really fall in love to each other or at least theres enough love to support your marriage. coz if theres no love then i dont think it will become a successful or become a happy marriage or just out of convenience knowing you are married already even though you really feel so empty. if you look for someone then go for someone you think you can love and someone whom that can give you love. good luck

Although I do not like the idea of an arranged marriage I respect your parents and your choice. But do not make a mistake by settling down just for someone's social class. Tell your parents that you want a guy who should be compatible with you in emotional level. Also he should be attractive to your eyes. Otherwise, you will have to basically keep compromising in order to make the marriage work.

I think you cant really say it for yourself because as you said they are the ones looking for a guy for you. Maybe you have your preference but it still up to them. If they are really arranging this marriage for you of course they would look for a good man. Are they trying to ask why to look for in a guy. If that's the case then you can still have a choice. I really dont get it because you said they are arranging the marriage for you but they are not sure of what to look for in a guy. They have a reason why they would do that because I think they dont want you to end up with somebody not suitable for you. It is so complicated. If they dont know what to look for then they should just let you choose the guy and have the guy evaluated by them.

vohh good question friend... now-a-days arranged marriage ohh who is going to do like that only 40% are like this ofcourse there are some who gives imp to this why becz when we go for this parents sees their 4 backgrounds in telugu (nalugu taralu), then if hey trust they go further. If you like he/she there will be no demands... expectations and all why becz he/she is everything for you. What i look is should be slim, first attraction, simply beautiful