Do you expect to be called Miss, Mrs or Mr so and so?
By coffeeshot
@coffeeshot (3783)
Australia
March 7, 2010 4:21pm CST
On television this morning they are discussing whether or not young people should address people as Miss, Mr and Mrs or by their first name. Some say it's old fashioned and some say young people should respect people who are older than them.
I personally think that it's a bit old fashioned and unnecessary. Times are changing and although I definitely do believe in respecting your elders, I also believe that everyone should be respected and treated equally. What do you think?
3 people like this
27 responses
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
8 Mar 10
Its depends on how we all are brought up…the kind of society around us and our traditional values. I would never even dream of calling my elders by their names and I’m in my late 30s but then this is my Indian tradition speaking up. In India we have a name to every relation, much like the ‘uncle/aunty’ of western people (which I think have become quite obsolete there) and a child is considered from a good family with proper culture only if the child calls each relation by its suitable address…I mean people would even faint if an aunt is suddenly called Mrs so & so
Now regarding the professional world…again we don’t really call people by their names. There are certain prefixes which are attached to the names to make them sound more respectful for those who are older…younger people are of course called by their names or in very formal offices, either by Ms/Mrs/Mr.
Just as you feel that respect should be for everybody irrespective of age, we too believe in the same way but within the family and relations, younger people really don’t mind if they are berated by the elders even from the extended family, its not taken as disrespect.
@longyiner (1)
• China
8 Mar 10
Here in my place, how to address people is very important. We usually adress those elders Mr/Ms. We never call them by their first name. It's very strange here if you called the elders by their first name directly. It's our tradition and culture.
In my opinion, for the sake of respect, we should adress strangers and elders Mr/Mrs/Miss so.
@Rosekitty (19368)
• San Marcos, Texas
8 Mar 10
Kinda a pet peeve of mine...lol
I'm not a miss..or Mrs. anymoreand definitely not a MR.. but what ihateiscalled Maam..or guy..like you guys..
I politely say my name is Rose easiest name there is and they smile and always tell me their name back..
I was raised to be polite to my Elders and i will continue as long as they deserve it and respect me the same way..
@str8_up_cutie83 (217)
• United States
8 Mar 10
I certainly believe and respecting our elders so I would always address them with mr. mrs. or ms. As for younger people I think that it is a matter of preference. A rule of thumb for me is that I always go by the relationship that me and that person have. If they are older and I dont know them I address them formally, if me and the other person know each other well I usually just use their first name. I have never used a formal greeting on someone younger than me though.
@max1950 (2306)
• United States
8 Mar 10
As you said respect is the word, i myself feel children in grammar school should, teens should ask friends parents if it's ok to use just their first name. i guess it's a Marine thing for me i call everyone either Sir or Mame, i guess it just stuck with me for the last 40 years.
@AmbiePam (92481)
• United States
9 Mar 10
When I was a child, I was told to refer to people as Mrs. or Mr. Mainly, it was my teachers. At church I was taught to do the same thing. Now that I'm older, the teachers I had, when I see one of them on occasion, I call them by their first name. It's automatic, I don't really think about it. When it is someone considerably older than I, like 60 (which is not old, I'm saying it is just older than ME) I use maam and sir. I just like to show them some respect. If I had kids, I would defnitely teach them to use the Mr. and Mrs. But when they are older, I wouldn't care if they used NON formal titles. To each their own. I don't see anything wrong with what you're saying either. I mean, I would prefer a little kid use my first name. I don't want to be a Miss or Ms. myself.
@GreenMoo (11834)
•
23 Mar 10
It´s always going to depend on who the person you are addressing is, and how they relate to you.
I would expect people I know to always use my first name, but if I went into the bank, for instance, and a teller I didn´t know chose to call me by my first name I´d think that was a little presumptious.
I really really hate it when people pick up my name from my credit card and use it back to me in the supermarket or similar.
@Aussies2007 (5336)
• Australia
8 Mar 10
If we are talking about Australia, I cannot remember the last time I heard someone calling someone Mr or Mrs. I suppose it still happens in business circles, but otherwise...
It was actually hard for me to adapt to this casual Australian approach when I arrived here in 1970 as an 18 year old from France where people were still very formal. Took me 10 years before I dropped the Mr.
I think the only question would be how a child should address a stranger. I still think that there should be some formality in addressing your teacher.
But you can get away with formality without being rude by simply saying "hello" or "good morning". That way you don't offend anyone by being over casual.
I really think that today, formality is only a problem for children. Teenagers actually enjoy being rude. It is something which comes naturally to them. lol
@scarlet_woman (23463)
• United States
8 Mar 10
no,it doesn't really matter to me,if they do or not it's fine(pertaining to me i mean).
i'm not too fond of "ma'am" tho.sounds a bit stodgy.
@OrangJuice (687)
• China
8 Mar 10
Haha...coffeeshot, I agree with you! I'm ususually comfortable if I'm called in such polite way. I'd like people call my name directly.But of course, in formal situation, it's different! But addressing correctly is also very important!
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
in here if they women sill look young even though they are married we used to call them miss and of course if they look matured or old its already obvious and we called them mrs unless they will be the one to correct it. but normally we use miss than mrs. theres nothing wrong to say those words as means of respect though it depends to them if they will tell us what they want they want to be called.
@ghieptc (2522)
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
Personally, even if it's a bit old fashioned respect is important and you have to earn it, so you should respect elders in order to respect you too. Although some people often address elder people just their first name, and it's like your calling them like your younger brother or sister, it's pretty rude for me. I guess we should continue to address people the way it was to be, unnecessary or old fashioned, it's how you would say it in a good way. So better to respect someone else, specially the elders or you might not be respect at all...
@Dhamodhar (97)
• India
8 Mar 10
Iam not agree with your points because everybody have some capacity and quality.You cannot call your boss"hey come here man".By the same way you can't treat your parents too.Each of them have some ability,we want to give some respect."give respect and take respect"When the small call you as some nickname mean you have some upset so think respect is very important
@chenxiaoyue_713 (2165)
• China
8 Mar 10
I usually address people according to their age and they don't seem to be offended, so i figured it should be right to address them by age. Personally, i like to be addressed with "miss" because it sounds young though i'm by no means old.
@yushen1008 (357)
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
i don't mind being called by my first name. for me, addressing Ms./Mr./Mrs. is just respecting the person you are calling if you're not really close to that person. although its a bit old fashioned, its a polite way of talking to a person older than you or addressing the person whom you don't know that much.
@drannhh (15219)
• United States
8 Mar 10
I think that depends entirely on how well acquainted the people in question are. I do not think children or anybody else should address strangers by their first names unless that is how they were introduced. That goes for children too. I think there is too much familiarity these days and that it does breed contempt. Why should a strange adult call a child by his or her first name?
Among adults who insist upon using titles, I expect to be called "Dr." and not "Ms." or "Mrs." because that is my proper title. If they expect me to address them formally, I expect to be addressed formally back again. If we are on a first name basis, it should go both ways and that includes priests, chiropractors, dentists, and physicians.
@jlamela (4898)
• Philippines
8 Mar 10
I lived in the Philippines and extremely detested how our culture dictates how we treated each other. Age becomes a Huge deal, younger people calls us "Ate" or "Kuya" Filipino terms for older sister or older brother. I don't mind if the one calling me "Ate" is 20 years younger than me, but if he or she is only 15 years younger that's hell of a terrible thing and I almost never response.
I hate to be called Miss too, gosh my mood will easily flared up hearing that dreadful address because it always remind me of my long singlehood!grrrrrr!So I prefer to call by my first name---ONLY!