I Am Not Asking Anything From You but.... I want to know where I stand....

That's really sad that your husband is treating you that way. He is very unfair and not treating you kindly. I think if it doesn't work you should let him go.. He doesn't even respect you,...

oh my eurekafemme .. i'm sorry for your pain, if you're ready for this, you better leave him.. i've just reply on your other discussion.. leave him, he doesn't deserve you.. infact you're the greatest gift he'd ever receive.. life can offer you million of chances for love and happiness.. don't be afraid for being a single parent, you'll have your families and friends support you.. all the best, my pray with you.. :)

again why men dont like me. he's a peice of crap. really men dont do stuipd things like this, i see it all the time where the men say oh i am going to change i promise. ok yeah they lie. until you actully see it and their actions show other words. they wont. i would never talk that way about my wife for no reason at all. i really think if you show him you are serouis if he dont start changing and you leave it might give him a kick of ok you are not taking this crap anymore from him,

hello eureka, Why wouldn't you asks him to have a talk...sit and talk. If things getting worst between you and your husband,and respect is out of the topic anymore,then,why are you still living together? Respect is the last thing in a relationship. If he is treating you as if you are just a plain wife "becoz of marriage contract..a piece of paper " as what they say (idiot say) wasn't it time to cut the strings? If you were ask me,i wouldn't dare to live long with that kind of situation. I am not saying that separation is the best solution,but,sometimes,we need to let go,in order to let them know our importance. Give yourself a break. Don't sit and have self pity,go on with your life. If he doesn't care about you,and you knew you had given your best,try another strategy. He thought that you can't live without him that is why he feels very proud and ignore you. Give him same treatment,ignore him and don't bother too much. Pretend you are also getting cold,let him know his shortcomings by realizing the way you treat him too.

He even blurted out that I should wait until my daughter gets older. For me, it is a a clear indication that he is ready to let go of me but not now because my daughters need me... Sigh... Uhmm. I have emptied a bottle of carbonated water this hour and I'm in the mood now to give my contribution as effect. The following is my interpretation of whats going on in his mind: Mahal na mahal ko siya. Kaya lang mahina na ako pagdating sa lambingan. Hilong hilo na ako dahil wala akong magawa at patuloy parin siya sa paghingi ng pangunawa kahit na naiintindihan ko naman siya. Sunog na mga sirkito ko at di na gumagana ang aking utak. Hindi na ako makapagsalita ng maigi at saka lang lumalabas ang sinasabi ko kung sumigaw ako. Paano na to? Para siyang langgam na kagat lang ng kagat kahit hindi ko naman inaano. Kung pwet ng aso matignan niya sasabihin na niya na iniinsulto siya nung aso. Kung masabi ko ngayon sa kanya ang lahat tiyak di niya yun makakalimutan. Lagi niyang maiisip ang mga sinabi ko. Ang mukha niya parang tulala at bata pa ang mga anak namin. Magaalala ang mga bata kung makita nila ang nanay nilang may iniisip. Pagnagtanong ang mga bata anong sasabihin niya? Mga sinabi ko? Sus ginoo, bata pa sila.

I am very sorry for you. You must be living like in a nightmare. Honesty and trust are crucial in any marraige. In my opinion you should confront him and make him tell you the whole truth. I would most probably leave the house until he makes up his mind to treat me well and be totally faithful to me. After all that is what you deserve and are entitled for as his wife. You cannot keep living a lie. You will just keep being miserable.

I agree with you. I wouldn't be with anybody who wouldn't tell me what was actually going on. It's better to know and if it's not positive move on with your life. If I were you, I would have reached my "done" point a while ago. Putting up with all these affairs and what not is just beyond me. I'm glad that you're finally deciding to make your husband make some choices. You may not like the results or his decisions, but trust me you'll be better of knowing.

ask him where you stand. from the sound of your story, i think he s taking forgranted of the relationship. have you tried seeking counseling or couples therapy or something like this?

hi there girl... do you still remember me? the last time i commented your discussion is all about your husbands CLEANLINESS. Do you gave birth already? as far as i remember you told me that you your due date is march. girl i feel so sad about your situation... just make m\your self strong 1st and focus to your baby then when you are physically strong and of course emotionally then you need to make a move for you and to your child. god bless

I am deeply sorry for you. You know it pains me to see couples having to go through divorce because of issues and differences that cannot be solved no matter how hard they try. Sometimes it makes me think, "Will that happen to me and whoever my husband will be someday?" Anyway, communication is the key, but it is not one-way you know. Your hubby HAS to cooperate; he HAS to tell you the truth, which you deserve, for all he knows you are being badly hurt! If it stays the same and nothing happens--he still tells you that nothing's wrong yet he talks negatively about you again behind your back--I honestly don't have a "love doctor" advice to give, but I think if it doesn't really work, you have to break away. Oh right, I can't believe I just typed that. I am always the one to believe in idealistic, fairy-tale-like relationships that I overlook the possibility of conflicts. All I can tell you is that you need to break away from that kind relationship because it is unhealthy. He's making you feel worthless whether he is aware of it or not. I just responded to a discussion that's about being single and happy rather than feeling lonely with a partner. And I think that is right. He tells you he loves you but he's not showing it. In fact through his actions he is doing the total opposite. I hope everything turns out fine for you. I know it's hard because of the kids but remember that God doesn't give one trials that he cannot overcome. Keep praying! I will pray for you and your family!

This sounds serious. I hope evrything gets well. I was in the same situation before with my husband. However, that was the time he was seeing another woman. We always fight. It always seems like everything I'm doing is wrong. He tells people in the office especially to my female colleagues that I'm very jealous whenever he is talking or texting female friends. I was always wondering then why it seems like something is wrong with our relationship. I don't feel secure and it seems like he is taking me and our baby for granted. I was pregnant during that time. One day I found out about the other woman. He never admitted it at first. However, my friends and even officemates told me that it's true and it has been going on for almost a month already. Even his two guy male friends who were also close to me admitted it was true. They told me they have choosen to remain silent because they never thought it was something serious and my husband was just flirting with the girl. The girl is also one of our officemates. However, they finally told me about it because they said they felt guilty that they know something's going on that I'm not aware of and then I'm pregnant. I confronted my husband about it again and he finaly admitted it. For almost one month our life was like a hell. We always fight because I can no longer trust him. I'm always crying whenever we fight. I'm alway thinking he's doing something behind my back. I have no peace of mind. After a month everything went fine. Everything happened about 10 months ago and now I can feel security in our relationship. My husband has changed but it did not happen overnight. What's important is he has changed and I know he's living up to his promises now. I can feel it. As a woman we have what we call woman instintc and we can feel if our partner is honest to us. I do really hope this will be fixed between you and your husband.

It is very sad to see that you are married to such an irresponsible person. He is simply taking you for granted. He is thankless about everything you do for him. I can see he is immature. It is very hard to change him. You cannot change him by being good to him. Now let his convictions convict him. You leave him all by himself for some time. You go to live separate. If you have, children take them along with you. A shock treatment alone will set him right. Let him feel your absence. If he still does not come around then it is better to leave him. These sorts of things day in and day out will give you hypertension, and other sickness like high blood pressure and diabetes will follow.

hey dude! i think you guys really need to sitdown and talk! ask and confront him why he is treating you like that and what have you done??? if you want to fix and save your marriage then you should have to understand him deeply for whatever reasons he will give you. i hope this will help

first move, you really have to communicate with him..you have to ask him about that matter and tell him about what you feel. And if this things still continues.. you have to let it go..get a grip girl you deserve to be happy..why would you linger with someone who doesn't even cared about what you feel and what you think?

eurekafemme, It appears to me that this difference in expectation hasn't been communicated to him like how it should have been between husband and wife. You married him for X number of years, but now you begin to lament about how dissatisfied you are with his attitudes towards everything else outside you. Perhaps you might already felt this coming many years back, but you probably opt for the easier option to avoid open talks. Now such behavior has been rooted - tearing them out of place will promise much strife. This is interesting because you covered a wide spectrum of issues, even some that might appear to be mundane, but certainly, these are clashes of definition of what you reckon he should or should not 'do'. You reckon that your marriage is not as happy as you would like it to be, but if you don't work on your marriage through proper channels and instead taking the easier option to avoid, I don't see how changes can take place by configuring your relationship on auto-pilot. You might fear that bringing those issues openly for discussion might escalate implications, but surely if you don't - you will escalate your frustration instead and will burst when you hit boiling point. Nobody is perfect, but hope lies in crafting a seeming-perfect marriage and like dough, love is not constant - it has to be remade and remoulded all the time. You got to work on your communication for many years to come. Take baby steps in achieving the big picture. Albeit that might not result in your ideal goal, but you have to look forward and strive to improve your relationship. You don't have to resign to a 'less-than-happy-marriage' - you certainly have a choice Take care and I pray that you will have the courage to confront your issues here.

Sweetie, no offense. I think you are wasting your time on him. If he doesn't have the guts to give you a straightforward answer, you tell him to move on then. I cannot understand why most men can open their yappers to other women, but not their own partners. This is not easy, but you have to decide what you want and what you want to do, as in very fast. Good Luck. TATA.

well,friend if ones your husband has adopted this attitude then,you can ask him clearely and tell him that he can go on his own ways the way he likes to enjoy the life!or he should tell the truth!oe else tell the truth and he can remain happy in the way he likes,as you tell him that i cant suffer this humilation more!but tell him to please tell the truth as you will not be able to live like this anymore,and its unbeareble!then you can get the answers,dont keep on tolreating this!and be clear!

Maybe theres a chance that your husband is demanding some more trust coming from you.He might feel that you dont trust him that much thats why hes almost rubbing it in your safe, i mean the way he tell his other female friends that he cant chat inside the house because of you. There might be previous experiences where in your not aware that you hurt him too. But anyways in this kind of situation you need to talk together and setlle things down. Besides your husband and wife and these kinds of petty squabble needs to be talked so that everything will be good for you and your husband again. Hope that helps somehow cheer up and dont be sad ;)