Who decides...
By fallingfan
@fallingfan (445)
United States
April 8, 2010 6:57pm CST
My dad just came home from grocery shopping and brought two items (cookies and a flavored milk) that my mom didn't think he should have spent so much money on and my mom started yelling at him for buying those things. I think that since my dad earned that money (and rarely spends any on himself) it was his call how he spent it - and besides, it was only a matter of a few bucks. What do you think?
For those of you who are married how do you manage your money? Do you each get half of the spending money? Do you control how your spouse spends his/her/your money?
1 person likes this
5 responses
@laglen (19759)
• United States
9 Apr 10
small purchases like that neither of us would think a thing about it. Large purchases, we discuss. We make big purchases together. I may not always agree with what he spends money on, but I am sure he doesnt always agree with my purchases. But we both earn money and are adults. Neither should "control" the other unless there has been a very bad problem.
@fallingfan (445)
• United States
9 Apr 10
I agree with you! Neither should control the others spending... I wish my parents would figure that out. :) Thanks for the response.
1 person likes this
@mavieserrano728 (670)
• Philippines
9 Apr 10
It really doesn't matter who spends, as long as you both have a certain budget and if all the bills are being paid then money should not be a problem. I don't really control him spending but I just remind him of the things that needs to be prioritized.
@fallingfan (445)
• United States
9 Apr 10
That's great that you don't control him, haha... must help out your marriage. :) Thanks for response!
@mavieserrano728 (670)
• Philippines
10 Apr 10
Yes I really don't have the habit of controlling. He has his own wants and material things that would somehow make him happy and I'll feel happy as well for him. Thank you for responding.
@sharlionse (739)
• Philippines
21 Apr 10
I think it will depend on what things were the money spent for. If it was clear for the couple to draw a line between needs and luxury, then any of them has the right to oppose the other if he or she spent for something not in their priority list.
If I were your mom, I would allow my husband to buy some things from his earnings as long as it is not a significant amount and something that he really really likes sometimes.
@fallingfan (445)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I understand and agree with the point that you make. :) Thanks for the response.
@p3ks626 (6538)
• Philippines
9 Apr 10
My parents are also quite like you parents but my mom doesnt yell at him if he buys something else. My mom already expects that my dad is going to go off the budget. I actually find it funny cause men and women have different ways in budgeting money and men are not really good at it. So, maybe when you get married in the future, you can teach your husband to budget. 
@fallingfan (445)
• United States
9 Apr 10
There's just something about my mom and money, it's almost like a paranoia thing... but then again, she has controlling problems in other areas of her life as well. :P Thanks for the response.
@Simi234 (142)
• India
9 Apr 10
It does not matter who earns the money. Your dad probably craved for cookies and flavored milk and he bought it. And after all the stuff he bought is not actually useless. So it should be ok for him to buy something that he wants to until ofcourse there is money shortage and your mom is trying to save
