How do you feel about dating?
By kaspera
@kaspera (46)
United States
April 14, 2010 12:10am CST
As a single mother, I find it difficult to date. When I can find a babysitter, I cannot stay out very late. I have to make due with what I've got. Anyone I have dated has been extremely jealous of the attention I give my children. By "extremely jealous," I mean bordering on insanity. Between, now trying to find work, housework, school, and children, I cannot seem to find the time or the room to even try to date and let someone else into my family. Does anyone else feel the same way?
3 responses
@bananamen1 (442)
• Bulgaria
14 Apr 10
That's familiar to me too. In spite of I don't have with who to go on a date, it's hard to have time for going out with friends. I think you just have meet the wrong guyes. The right one would accept you have a child.
@kaspera (46)
• United States
15 Apr 10
I completely agree. It seems, though, that are no "right" guys any more. My priorities are my children, and school. Children always come first, no matter what, and most guys (and please no one take offense to this) do not want to have to share the attention or to know that they are always going to have to compete with children and other responsibilities. Men like it easy. Most single mothers do not have it easy. I agree that it is even hard to find time to go out with friends. Honestly, I do not think I even want to look for a guy at all any time soon. This is because my life is full and chaotic, and I have no room another person, especially if that person is just going to stress me out more. I just wanted to see if anyone felt the same way.
@alaskanray (4636)
• United States
12 Jun 10
My daughter just turned 16 and in the course of her short life I have actually been engaged three times. All three times I broke it off. I am just a stickler for honesty, among other things.
I know the feeling of being a "loser magnet". It seems that the guys that I admire and respect are looking for something else (not me) but the ones I don't want are looking at me. It was that way long before I ever became a mother, though. For a long time I was "settling" because I had not yet learned that it's better to be alone than with the wrong person. Now I'm at a point where if I ever did start seeing another guy, it would have to be someone I've known for a long time that I know I can trust. I have a hard fast rule against dating strangers.
I've actually been amazed at how many guys out there actually are attracted to a mother but I've been burned so many times, I'm not interested in any strangers. Now, if someone I knew when I was younger came back into my life, I would jump but anyone else has a long way to go before I let him into my life.
@joedollarhuat (580)
• Philippines
14 Apr 10
I personally, am not in your situation so its hard to relate. If you are a mother, there are multiple things you have to think about. Your priority is your baby and not another person in your life. It is also relatively hard to find a guy that will date a single mother.
@bananamen1 (442)
• Bulgaria
14 Apr 10
It's easy to judge when you look aside...I guess Kaspers knows very well what is her prioroty. And everybody needs someone to share his/her life with. I don't see nothing wrong with this. Being a good mother doesn't mean you have to forget that you have your own needs.
@mzwriter1993 (56)
• New Zealand
13 Jun 10
I felt the same problem back when I was dating this nice girl. I felt time pressuring against me and honestly, I felt I wasn't ready for it. Before you date, you have to ask to yourself - do you want this person in your life?
Guess we all learn from our mistakes.
