how to break up with someone.....

if you go back to her every time that means you still love her and is just bored. i have a male friend who once consoled another friend of mine (a female) regarding the status of her more than 6 years of relationship. my male friend says that after 5 years and the guy isn't offering marriage that is a sign that either they call the relationship off since one of them would grow tired of the other or they take the plunge and marry. unfortunately, after investing love and care to each other for more than 5 years they didn't end up together.

Hi Robert and Welcome to mylot, It's hard to say whether you love her at all or if she is just habit. Only you can answer that one. Normally, I'd say to take a break from each other and see how you feel apart but it sounds as if you have already done that. Maybe you need more time apart to see what your feelings really are for each other. Have you talked with her about all this? Maybe you are just in a rut and getting out and doing more things together would help? Sometimes when we are with someone for a long time we start taking them for granted and that is never a good thing. One thing that I see as a big problem would be the cheating. Does she know about it? Lies and deceit don't make for a strong relationship or love.

That is usually what happens if the relationship is that long. It's usually the time for either break-up or marriage. Perhaps both are in the relationship because both are thinking that it's rare for a couple to be together for 6years. If I were you, try to assess yourself. I don't think you're out of love, perhaps the mystery and the excitement had just gone down. Even husbands and wives know that, because that will happen regardless who you're with. But the question now is, do you want to grow old with this person? or are you in it because of the 6years? I would probably let you go by now if you were my boyfriend. I wouldn't want to be with someone who is just in it because he's afraid that the 6years would have gone to waste. It would be sad. On the other hand, why don't you try to spice things up. Instead of looking for other people, why don't you do something to keep the love strong. Go with on a trip with her, something adventurous and both haven't tried. How about going to a destination where both have never been to? Do some hobby together perhaps? or if nothing happens, why not talk to her and suggest bot not see each other for a while, to see if you'd miss each other. But be sure that you won't do anything to destroy the relationship by cheating again. It is the only you'd know if you really love her. It's sad really. It's really really sad. But why waste time if you're really not in love with the person, right? It's all up to you.

I am surprised she is still with you if you keep cheating on her. I think you are only with her because she believes you when you say your sorry. You need to stop running back to her be honest and say we need to talk but i am no longer in love with you the longer you drag it on the harder it will be and the more you wil end up hurting her.

i am overwhelmed as i am reading your post. how sad that your 6 years of being together will just be put to waste. i don't think it's fair to your girlfriend that you are cheating on her. i would rather that you come clean and confess to her. be man enough and tell her the truth that make her believe that you are still into her when you are no longer in love with her. she will be hurt of course but that is better than you prolonging the agony.

Before you break up with her, think about how everything would be without her as your lover. Do you want that scenario? Do you want to spend the rest of your life with her? If you can't imagine spending the rest of your life with her, then it's the time you should break up with her. Because if you know that it's bound to end someday, then you should end it now before everything gets out of control. Think about your relationship with her. Do you still want her in your life? Do you really see her as your girlfriend/future wife? Or just a friend that you can talk to? Don't make decisions that you may regret. Maybe you're just weak, and getting "bored" with your relationship because it's been so long. If this is the cause, then you may look for solutions. Maybe you could do some stuff to add spice and thrill to your relationship, just like how it was before. Does she know about you cheating? How do you feel about cheating? Do you regret it, or do you think you would be doing it again without hesitation? Analyze everything first. Maybe you should talk to her about it, let her know what you're feeling and going through right now. You should be open to her, and don't hide things from her.