What about people of your interests who you do not know personally/
By suspenseful
@suspenseful (40192)
Canada
April 15, 2010 12:40pm CST
i love to cook and I also love to write - do not have much time for the latter except on myLot because I am quite busy. For the last few weeks, two writers who have a few books published on writing have asked me to be their friend on Face book. Well I finally said yes - because I might get a few hints on how to improve my work without having to pay a lot for a course.
So as soon as I decided to join, Facebook pops up with the question, are you sure you are their friend. well one of the writers lives in Australia and I am sure I do not have that much money to travel all over Canada, let alone go to Australia and knock on his door and say, "Hello I just moved here-"
A friend of mine did ask me once, "Where did you meet someone?" and I did not exactly shake hands with that person she was talking about, except we did have similar interests.
So what does Facebook consider friends, people you know personally, people who have a similar interests, people you wish to have a similar interest, or what?
4 people like this
10 responses
@carmelanirel (20942)
• United States
15 Apr 10
I think this is a precaution against accepting a friend request from someone you don't know. I like ti, for when or if my son ever gets facebook, it will remind him of being careful who he accepts as his friend..
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
15 Apr 10
Well what about me accepting an invite from Rachel Ray since I do watch her show, get her magazines, but I do not live in New York? It does poise a problem since unless I get a lot of money, I am not going to appear on the Rachel Ray Show.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
16 Apr 10
It makes sense to me. It is just that some may take it to mean those who you did not exactly hugged or met personally. And if you do not know them personally would it not be a similar interest? Perhaps Facebook means those whom you would want to know or if they met you, you would start talking as if you were old friends.
2 people like this
@mipen2006 (5528)
• Australia
15 Apr 10
I'm not sure about Facebook friends. When I was staying with my daughter in Pert (Australia) she put me on Facebook, and since then I have had people listed as past friends of mine, but I have never heard of them. If you have similar interests, like writing, traveling, or a similar hobby, then it would be nice to have them as friends. However where you draw the line, I guess is up to you. Where friendship lies in Facebook's eyes, I don't know.
4 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
16 Apr 10
I have no idea. They might mean those of similar interests or those that would be friends to you if you met them in person. But one of my own friends seems to think it is those who you k new personally and you actually met. If that were the case, Facebook would not grow as big as it is now.
3 people like this
@sweetlady10 (3611)
• United States
15 Apr 10
For me it is not important to meet a person to be friend. If our interests, hobbies, and thinking are similar we can be friend from distance also. Most important thing is sharing something similar and appreciate each other. When it comes to Facebook or other social networking site, they mainly bring people together who does not meet in really life. So, it does not make sense when it ask " are you sure you are their fried?"
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
16 Apr 10
That was what i wondered about the question. I tend to join the people I know personally, and those who I will eventually met maybe just once a year when vacation runs around and they are in church. But lately there have been those who had similar interests or causes who have asked me to be their friend. So that is who I wonder if it would be all right.
1 person likes this
@allyoftherain (7208)
• United States
15 Apr 10
Facebook asks you where you met someone to caution you against adding people you don't know at all. At least, that's my theory. I really don't add people I've never met in person except for a select few online friends that I've known for years (may I repeat? YEARS) on other online message forums. I've since met two of these people in person.
Facebook considers whoever you add as your friend, your friend. Who you choose to be your friend on facebook is your business, whether you want to add every request that comes along or only add people you've actually met and shaken hands with.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
16 Apr 10
I add the people I actually met even though I may have seen only once, but since most of my friends are my church friends, and some are moved away, we not only are friends, but have similar interests. I have one myLot friend whom I have similar interests even though I have not met her.
However, I am a writer, and there is a couple of authors who put out online publications that I just pout on Facebook because of similar interests as well.
Then there are the ones I see, professional people who have something similar or more than one similar interests. I mean, I have not met Rachel Ray, and since I love cooking, whether that would be right to add her to Facebook or join her Facebook friends.
1 person likes this
@cyrus123 (6363)
• United States
16 Apr 10
I don't know to tell you the truth. The reason why I say this is because I have friends on there I do know as well as some I don't. There are one or two on there who are also on mylot. Some of my family members are on there that live far away and it's the best way I know how to keep in touch with them. I also have a lot of friends on there I went to school with and a lot I go to church with. If I don't know the person who has sent me a friend request, I usually ask them if I know them before I confirm it. I run into people all the time I don't know from Adam and they will say they met me somewhere one time. Then, I remember them. Kathy.
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
16 Apr 10
The same here. I have friends whom I know personally by sight, those whom I met a few years ago or just once, and also one who is a myLotter. I also have a couple who are authors. I was thinking of making a few more, since it would be nice asking questions, etc. but that rule about having to know them does seem to get in the way.
It is not as if I am some teenager or younger, that I have to worry about having a criminal from jail trying to find out my address and phone number by asking me to be his friend on Facebook.
Besides is there not a category where you can only tell your closest friends and no one else something private?
2 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
17 Apr 10
I know where that is and I use that. There are somethings that I want not just my personal friends to know, but the some of the others, but not all of the others. I really do not have that much on my profile as most of my friends know me. And I am wary about those who I do not know as well and yet I have a similar interest or more then one interest the same as they do.
@SflWebGuy (6)
• United States
16 Apr 10
I have about 1100 friends on Facebook but i only truly know about 30 of them maybe 35. But I never decline a request because I find meeting people in different ways is very interesting. Plus I am always looking for business opportunities so that is another reason why i accept all requests.
3 people like this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
17 Apr 10
Most of my friends on Facebook are from my church and I only go on Facebook about once a week. I do want to get more friends because I am interested in cooking, music, and writing. I am not into promoting a business although when I finish my novel, I will be promoting that, but since my funds are limited, I have to find a way to send it by email when it is finished.
@SflWebGuy (6)
• United States
17 Apr 10
It is very easy to promote your book online even with short funds, my father in-law has written 3 books and I promote them for him. I can show you how and as far as sending via email, your best bet would to make an ebook and then set it up to be downloaded.
If you need help let me know and I can explain it to you.
@gtargirl (5376)
• United States
21 Apr 10
I don't think it matters to Facebook if you really truly are someone's friend. Look at all the celebrities on the site? They have 5,000 friends and beyond. I'm pretty sure they don't know any or most of those "friends" personally. I connect with family who live overseas and friends I have now (real friends). But I also have connected with family I never knew I had. Plus I have added people in my church and that seemed to have broken down a lot of barriers. Facebook is there for people to connect and re-connect. So yeah, all of the above applies--real friends, family, people who have similar interests and so on. We actually have our writers group on FB with people asking to join. It's a blast.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
17 Apr 10
Not that i know of...I am a member of facebook and i am there everyday several times per day....If you see someone that you want to be friends to you send a request for that person to approve you and they let the person know, and if they except you then you are friends....It does NOT matter to facebook if you know them or not, it depends on the person you are asking, they can either except you or they can deny you....
1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
20 Apr 10
That was what I was not clear on. I thought it mean people I knew personally. I know one of my friends did ask me when I met that other person whom I put down as a friend, because she figured you had to either hug the person or shake their hands and say Hi everytime you met them.
So it does make it easier for me to get more friends on Facebook.
@slickcut (8141)
• United States
17 Apr 10
I have lots and lots of friends on facebook that i do not know personally....They are my game friends we help each other out @ send each other gifts...Maybe the person you ask, questioned you and facebook ask you because of the person you ask questioned you..
1 person likes this
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
17 Apr 10
hi suspenseful I do not have a place in facebook but shouldnt facebook
leave you alone, you can be a friend without being in their country so
face book does not seem
fair to me. also have you ever taken any creative writing classes at your local junior college as they are usually fairly priced, I did that many years back a nd it does help ones writing although I am not published as it grew so expensive to send out synopsis and three chapters to various publishers.I would think facebook should consider friends as people with the same interests, otherwise it would not be very fair.
fair to me. also have you ever taken any creative writing classes at your local junior college as they are usually fairly priced, I did that many years back a nd it does help ones writing although I am not published as it grew so expensive to send out synopsis and three chapters to various publishers.I would think facebook should consider friends as people with the same interests, otherwise it would not be very fair.1 person likes this
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
20 Apr 10
I cannot afford to take creative writing courses and it would have to be over the internet anyway since I am looking after my husband who has als and he needs someone to care for him while I am away. I did have a few books on writing and there is a writing course over the net, but it costs a bit.
I am looking for a publisher who will accept contributions over the net- email, but right now I am still working on the last draft and there are still some things that need fixing.
It is not Facebook I have trouble with - except when they have that "sure you are his or her friend" notice. Now if they put "do you want him as your friend," and it goes like that, it would suit me fine. But I am sure friend is loosely interpreted to mean those whom you have not met in person, but wish to as you share common interests.
