Hard to trust again
By vjenkins86
@vjenkins86 (1478)
United States
April 29, 2010 4:36pm CST
My cousin has not had the best of luck when it comes to guys. Her last long relationship ended with her boyfriend sleeping around on her while she was pregnant with his baby. She knew or at least suspected that was happening she didn't truly break up with him until months later when everyone she worked with began gossiping about her boyfriend's newest fling. Anyway, that was seven months ago. Since then she has been floating from guy to guy. I had thought she was getting really close with this one guy who was a good guy. He cared about her and her baby. He was interested in taking things to the next level. However, just as I thought he was gonna be with her for awhile, she announced that she was seeing someone else. This new guy is nice too. He sounds sincere and he includes the baby in several of their "dates".
I'm just concerned that my cousin is going to jump from good guy to good guy, not able to trust anyone after the loser she left. I understand how hard it is to trust again. It took me years to trust any man after several losers myself. I just don't want to see her miss out on a chance to be with one of these really good guys who appear to truly care about her. What would be your advice?
1 person likes this
4 responses
@juliecasinto (2)
•
1 May 10
uhm i advice to her be strong of any problem comes and try to move on and find the guy who's for her!!!!!
because not all the guy is like him theres a guy that realy deserving and have a good heart and find him!!!!
cousin suport her to be strong and to guide her in any way....
always pray and have a faith in god!!!!!!
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
1 May 10
Thank you for your advice. I will most definitely support and guide her to the best of my ability. Thank you.
@tessagarrett (57)
• United States
1 May 10
sorry bout this =] its nice she has someone who cares though =] i think u should tell her how you feel. or maybe its just time she needs to realize that not all guys are the same and then she will settle. hope it all works out =]
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
1 May 10
Thank you. You might be right. She might just need time. I only hope she will settle before she runs off every decent guy who wants to be with her. Again, thank you for your response.
@apoljuice1 (730)
• Philippines
30 Apr 10
I'd tell her exactly what you're telling us here: that if she keeps jumping from one guy to another, she might actually leave a man that's sincere enough to hold her trust. But the problem is, unless she feels safe and ready to risk getting hurt again, she will never just settle down. You said it yourself, it took you years to trust another man. She's not going to understand the feeling of giving trust one more time and not having it broken unless a guy shows her that he would be trustworthy. I'm sure that you see things that she doesn't but if she's not ready to listen to you, then she's not going to change. Best bet is just be there for her, and make her realize how she's hurting people when she leaves them just like when she got hurt. Tell her that the people she's hurting aren't the guys who used to hurt her. If she doesn't take your word for it, then she's just not ready to get into a commitment, and that's something that you can't force.
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
1 May 10
Thank you for your response. You make a good point. If she's not ready to get into a commitment, there's nothing I can really do but just wait and see.
@vishnumuthu (169)
• India
30 Apr 10
ya it is really hard to say that it is a problem and i think u have some thing different so what i say u talk to then and so your problem to them and then u decide weather to trust them or not as every thing is in your hand..you decide and have a good plan and finish all things and i think there will be a correct solution for every problem and so u try and then have a complete change in the thing so that u can with with things which a different idea..have a better idea..and have fun..
