My former boyfriend came back, what should I do?

Hi: In my views,you should accept this man you have now.please believe your fate. I comprehend you still love the former,but he couldn't keep his word.You need to learn quit.With that you could get true love.

they are all right. you know who you love most. you're just afraid to lose one or take the wrong guy..I been in that situation.. and there is only one quote, i always believe in, "I'd rather marry the one i cant live without than the man I can live with".. coz in the long run, no matter how imperfect your marriage will be, you would always stick with the person you love most than the person you think loves you more..The 2nd best may not hurt you much, but definitely you wouldnt have much forgiveness and love than the one you truly care for.. Don't be afraid to take a plunge. Life is short to be spend with just someone you dont really really love.. In Tagalog, "Iba ang mahalaga, sa mahal"

Hey there! Wow! Looks like you have a pretty complicated situation in your hands. Well I think that this is one point in your life wherein you have to get away from everything in order to reflect on who between the two should you choose. I suggest taking a vacation for a couple of days, or weeks if you still can't make a decision in order for you to reflect and clear your mind. And for you to really think and make the right decision. And hopefully you will be able to come up with the best decision on who should you choose between your two lovers.

This might seem indeed a very difficult situation. But, more simply put, you have to choose between a guy that dumped you when he was abroad (probably because he had another relationship there) and a guy that cheated on you (when you were togheter). Although, ultimately, you need to decide on which man is better for you, now, and in the long-run, take into consideration the fact that some risks are worth taking and pay off - others end is catastrophy and heartache. You should know that one of the risks you're going to take are to be dumped again and cheated again. My advice is to think very carefully about the decision you're going to make. Don't rush into it and don't decide for reasons that aren't valid or rock solid. You just need to follow your heart and your gut. Either way, you are probably going to hurt someone. You need to make sure that you are 100% sure about your decision and that you don't beat around the bush. Once you choose one man, stick with him. Don't lead the other guy or make him think he has a chance. That above would be my oppinon as a friend. However, my oppinion as a man, would be to forget them both and go for another one. I had many - too many relationships and I know that when a man cheats on a woman, or dumps her for another, well... and she accepts him back, he won't respect her for that. And sooner or later, he will go chasing passion in the arms of another.

hi, my advice for you will be that you should allow that your boyfriend back because allthings really depends on love if you guys do really love each other then i think you shouldallow him back but if otherwise then i think you should not allow him cause of the future. youguys may end up divorcingt yourself then that is not agood one.but every thing really depends on love

Hey aphrodite! You should look into your heart... neither of the two guys is a safe solution in my mind, for many reasons. Of course no guy is a safe bet, but you should go with the odds for something this big (marriage). So plan ahead, think hard and test a lot. One has cheated you (although it might have been the only time) and one wasn't responding to you, when god knows what he was doing when he was away, which again could have been nothing, or just a bad time for him. If you don't like the fact that he is bothering you, then that's a different issue, that should be sorted out, once you realize what/who you want for you. I don't want to lead you, you should think for your self, it's better that way, even mistakes will make you stronger. But here are a few facts, "what you don't know wont hurt you" (old boyfriend) which also might turn out to be nothing as I said. What you do know (current boyfriend), might make you feel even worst if you think back, and regret decisions of the past. Both go both ways of course, and for both the boyfriends... Good luck!

Nobody is coercing you to accept the deal that life has thrown at you, but without the higher wisdom to accept that certain things in life are uncontrollable, we will always lead a life of misery because we will constantly be assailed with such phenomenon in life. One can be emotional, but one cannot indulge in self pity. The latter only seek to degenerate your mind and spirit, which you will find it ridiculously arduous to piece them together once such insidious value has sunk deep roots. Firstly, you don’t aim for success without having to accept your circumstances from within because success often slipped from a person who can’t grasp properly. Paradoxically speaking, it is like telling a person to run when he/she doesn’t know how to use his/her legs for it. If you are unable to manage yourself internally, forget about the success you so dream or speak of and want so badly. Success goes to the person who gains self mastery and self mastery first begins from self acceptance. Surely, nobody said it is easy to move on, especially since your situation involved an involuntary separation of circumstances. But in the essence, it is the same as those who have broken up inevitably because similar depression derived from the inability to continue the mutual relationship in a meaningful fashion. The essence of such phenomenon denotes the impermanence of love, in which once the universal lesson is taught, the existence of the person will naturally disappear. The nature of such a relationship is often karmic and until we gain the necessary wisdom to pierce through this illusion that masked itself as ‘true love’ in our context, we will never be able to release ourselves from this emotional bondage. Our learning in love is a series of stages; each relationship does not exist individually as finality to the whole, much more than a mere part within the intricate system. You don’t exactly possess love in a way you do for physical objects; it only seeks to teach, while you humbly learn or reject what it has to offer. By rejecting or denying your circumstance, it only creates a position where you would face emotional torment from the futile resistance, bleeding in greater amount until clarity appears. To help you let me provide some personal analytic to help you see another perspective and hopefully gain a clearer understanding of yourself. For your first boyfriend who went to Canada to study, as much as you would like to think that you been through a lot of emotional times with him, it's more of how much you needed him than he needed you in reality. You see, he could effectively survive through his life rather uneventfully, even without your presence. In my experience I've met with such feigns and simply understand what's in their minds, so let me be very brutally honest about him. He needs the title of being 'single', so as to be 'socially eligible' in his community that values monogamy, to date other girls without being branded as a b.a.s.t.a.r.d. He is exceptionally nice to you in private because he has a hidden agenda and he doesn't want to reveal to anybody, in any ways. Basically he wants to avoid putting himself in situations where he would be 'questioned' by another person. No question hence no answer needed. He likes to be in the driver's seat where he likes to know everything about you whilst you simply does not have any inkling idea about him at his end. As for your current boyfriend, let me very straightforward here, where I simply could believe that a relationship can move on without trust and mutual love. I do not blame you for being suspicious and unable to trust him fully after what he had done. Betrayal is just the lowest and meanest deed to kill any relationship and yours is no exception. There is always a danger in loving someone and not realizing if there was the love you thought it was when you first acquired it. You must understand that people are not responsible for your gains and falls, so you must learn to pick yourself up and keep walking, even if it means having to cut yourself several times over and over again. Let me offer you a friendly advice here, leave these 2 aside and move on. Don't accept this as some kind of destiny of your life as you just deserve better or otherwise the best in this life. You have choices especially when you everything is on your side. Take care.

Hmmm... This is a tough situation. I understand how very confused you are right now. I think that the best way to make a good decision is to clear your mind and sort things out first. You need to be on your own so you can think and feel freely without any pressure or distraction from any of the two guys. Getting into marriage is something serious. You have to make sure who and what you really want before you invlove your self in this contract.

Hello... I just want to know if the reasons your former boyfriend gave you why he did not bother to communicate with you were valid. You just have to weigh things out. Maybe you really love the first guy but you are afraid to take the chances since you don't want to get hurt again. On the other hand, you may want to hang on with the other (2nd) guy because you feel that he was there when you needed someone to hold and to love at the same time, you don't want to hurt the your current boyfriend because you know the feelings of being rejected. Just pray and ask HIM for guidance to lead you on the correct decision. Good luck and God bless!

Hi there, I would say sit down for an hour or two and think long and hard. Why does guy #1 keep running away? Does he want you to follow him to Canada? Is there a reason why he can't stay here in the states? He may be wanting you to come with him to Canada to meet his folks? I mean there must be a reason why he keeps coming back to you, because he sounds as though he can't get you outta his head and that no other girl seems to compare to you. Sounds as though he is still inlove with you. Find out from guy #1 why he keeps leaving? I feel like he needs to give you some answers. Ask him all the questions that are on your mind. Be blunt but in a nice way with him and ask him how he feels about you and why he keeps coming back to you and what he plans on doing about it. Don't ask him if he loves you, you want to get him to tell you from his own mouth how he feels about you. If he says he's inlove with you and you truly feel he's inlove with you then take a chance with him. Tell him exactly how you feel and what's on your mind. This way all the feelings are out there on the table. Then you can work out the living arrangements if he gave you a firm commitment like a marriage proposal. Don't move in with him until you guys are married. This way if things don't work out you don't have the hassle of trying to move your stuff outta his house or him trying to move his stuff outta your house. As far as boyfriend #2 I'm sorry there's no second thoughts or chances on cheaters. But that's just me.