Martial life
By Tangeryne
@Tangeryne (412)
India
May 8, 2010 7:26am CST
Hey everyone, was just thinking. I'm at a stage in life where everyone around me is getting married- my classmates, colleagues even people younger than me ( which makes me feel old). It's not that I don't wanna get married, it's just kinda annoying since I don't have anyone with whom I can have a future with and also questions about- when are you going to tie the knot??!!! My parents aren't so bothered about it but my nosey relatives are!! Especially since a younger cousin of mine is married for 3yrs now! All my friends are taking the plunge. I have about 10 weddings to attend this year!! Already attended two recently!
What do you think? Anyone stuck in a similar situation like me?
6 responses
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
9 May 10
Well, have you ever thought that your friends may be envious of YOU? Think about that for a minute. You have freedom, you are only 25 (certainly not old in my eyes) and I didn't get married until 2008 when I was 42! Granted, it's a bit old to start having children (for me I mean) but, to be honest, I've never wanted them and neither has my husband, which is fortunate!
What I'm trying to say is that getting married and having children so young isn't for everybody, no matter what country they are from.
I wouldn't think about it too much. Just carry on as you are, you will be fine.
What I'm trying to say is that getting married and having children so young isn't for everybody, no matter what country they are from.
I wouldn't think about it too much. Just carry on as you are, you will be fine.@Tangeryne (412)
• India
9 May 10
Hey Janey..nice to hear from you again..Yea sometimes people are envious because they made the mistake of getting married too early and missing out on life before marriage. In the UK or The States or European countries, things work differently. People get married whenever they feel like and there's no time frame for marriage. Here its not like that. As age catches up, its difficult to get a partner. Well that's mostly with the arranged marriage concept that's very popular here. When I look around me, everyone's either in a relationship or married, hardly any people around who are single! hehehe..that kinda worries me and I keep thinking I'm doomed to stay single all my life! Oh well, I'm just drifting now and hoping that someone will come along my way soon.
@Janey1966 (24170)
• Carlisle, England
9 May 10
Thanks for explaining about your cultural set-up a bit more, I understand it better now. I still wouldn't beat yourself up about it though. I know it's easy for me to say that as I'm in a completely different country but you have said that your parents aren't that concerned, which, I think is a good thing. The pressure is reduced somewhat because of your understanding parents. You are lucky to have them and they are lucky to have you too.
@elsewhere (53)
• Philippines
8 May 10
Don't be negatively affected by what they. You should follow your own pace.
You can make something good out of the situation you're in or about other peoples' annoying words. Those who get married may serve as an inspiration and warning to you-- for you ensure that one day you will marry someone that you truly want to be in a marriage commitment with. Your single status may also constantly remind you how happy you are, in spite of (well I do hope you are). And that you don't need to hurry, because haste can be rather damaging.
@elsewhere (53)
• Philippines
8 May 10
Oh dear, the typos.
*by what they say.
*the situation you're or other peoples' annoying words
*for you to ensure
@Tangeryne (412)
• India
8 May 10
First of all welcome to Mylot. I'm quite young on Mylot too as you can see, just a month old. Hehe.
Thanks for your input. Well, I'm not happy with the single status as most people who are single! Just got out of a relationship so its tough. I'm on the road to recovery but there are hurdles on the way and times when I think about it and get depressed. I don't care what people say, just joke about the subject when they ask me these ques. Definitely on no hurry, after I've got my fingers burnt, I'm more careful. Anyways, wish me luck!! lol..
@skysuccess (8858)
• Singapore
8 May 10
Tangeryne,
Peer pressure.
I hope that you are not being pressured to rush into a relationship or rather marriage by your peers. Let me assure you that this is one aspect you really should heed what is preached, taught and even sung....Phil Collins - "You Can't Hurry Love".
In the first place, it would be good for you to remember that as far as marriage is concerned "You began with nothing. You cannot lose nothing, but you can win something." So, just be patient.
@Tangeryne (412)
• India
9 May 10
Hey there..nope, I'm not being pressurized by anyone. My parents are pretty laid back about it as well. It's just that with everyone around me settling down, sometimes I wonder maybe I should do the same as well. Not that I'm in a hurry, still gotta find Mr. Right and I'm nowhere close to that ;-) So I'm like in two minds, sometimes I think even I should find someone quick and settle down. Hop onto the bandwagon like everyone else. Then on the other hand, I don't wanna get married so soon. Wanna enjoy life and date a few guys before settling down. And I gotta find Mr. Right that will take some time. Already got my fingers burnt, so once bitten twice shy! :-)
@se7enthbird (8307)
• Philippines
8 May 10
i am married already, in our family of 5 children i am the first born but i was the one who got married last. i know what you mean about people asking you when will you tie the knot specially when they see that you are single and available. it is okay if they ask and you are in a relationship. but you dont need to pressure yourself just because they are asking you questions like that. to get married you need to be emotionally, financially prepared. it is not a all happy ever after thing. lucky i was not pressured with them and took my time and wait for the person who perfectly fit for me.
@lovelyn_medrano (3070)
• Philippines
14 May 10
Don't rush and don't be bothered with the people around you. Marriage is a commitment- a serious commitment which comes with responsibilities. It is not as simple as picking the guy you want, it is more on your readiness to face the real life and real responsibilities that comes along with it.
For the mean time just enjoy your single life... You cannot bring back those days if you are married already...
@manubla (472)
• Philippines
8 May 10
My parents didn't mind before but now that I am in my 30s, they, together with my relatives, are pressuring me to settle down. But then what can I do? I don't have someone to marry. Besides, even at this age, I'm not even rushing. Of course I also want to get married someday but I don't wanna do it just for the sake of doing it.
Until then, I'd like to just enjoy the things that life has to offer but also crossing my fingers that I meet my prince charming soon. :)
@Tangeryne (412)
• India
8 May 10
I'm in the exact same situation but my parents have started nagging me about it yet! Good luck to you. Hope you find Mr. Right soon :-)
