How can I help this family?
By Porcospino
@Porcospino (31366)
Denmark
May 9, 2010 12:41pm CST
One of my parents' friends has cancer, and it looks like he has only a few months left. He doesn't want his wife to tell his relatives and his friends about his illness, but she has told my parents the truth anyway. My father and him have been friends for 40 years, but he doesn't want to see my father or talk to him. My father is sad about that, but he respects his decision.
His friend accepts no visitors, not even his own children. This situation is very hard for his children, because they would like to help him and they would like to spend the rest of the time with him, but he won't let them. His children are not my close friends, but I have known them my entire life, and I wish there were something I could do to help them and their parents in this situation.
What would you do if you were me?
5 responses
@screwdriver (643)
• Philippines
10 May 10
If I were you, i will try to convince that person to spend them with his children and relatives the remaining days left. I would rather be with them and spend the rest of every minute than being alone. But I would also respect his decision though, but try to think about it, leaving your children in grief because he didn't allow his children to be with him. I understand its hard to accept that fact that anytime soon he will be gone, but its more painful on his children's part because he didn't give him the chance to take care of him and allow his children to make him feel that whatever conditions his into his children still accept him.
@kukaw27 (50)
• Philippines
10 May 10
We have different sites, different opinions regarding with a certain situation.For I would rather tell his (the with cancer) children to surprise him...There's no way to do with such kind of situation but to let him feel that he is loved by the people surround him. And let your father advise him, to enjoy the rest of his life with his loved ones.
@alexies29 (124)
• Philippines
10 May 10
You can always offer prayers for him. We have to understand that this is a very tough time for him. He might be in the denial stage. He could not accept that he's ill and dying. Time will come that he'll learn to accept his situation, and maybe that will be time that he'll accept visitor. For the meantime, just pray for him and for recovery. Miracles could happen.
1 person likes this
@NatashaBird (640)
•
10 May 10
Just make sure that he and his family know that people are prepared to be there for them should they want support. This friend should be allowed to spend his last days however he wishes and should not be pestered to act in a certain way just to please others. If there is any time that he can be selfish it is now.
1 person likes this
@cobrayogesh (174)
• India
10 May 10
i would stop looking at him like a ill person and take steps to bring him out take him to movies theme parks and give the lost shot what he wnats and experienced in life no matter what it is and uttainable .....if u fail in the above keep his family satisfied make him feel u are there to help his family in need after his life on earth
1 person likes this
@coolsharvan (144)
• India
10 May 10
keep him very very happy
spend time with him
show love towards him
1 person likes this
