What's your thoughts on girls asking guys out?
By laydee
@laydee (12798)
Philippines
May 12, 2010 5:33am CST
I came across this situation in one of the social networking sites I have joined. Some girl is asking us if she should ask him out because obviously he isn't going to do anything about their situation as acquaintances.
Hmmm.. My initial thought is: "If he isn't asking you out, doesn't it mean that he doesn't like you that much?"
Call me conventional, but I just don't see the point of humiliating yourself to some guy who is obviously not into you. It wouldn't feel good either when he would just go out with you so that he won't humiliate you or something.
You're like trying to do the first step to be hurt.
Well, I think there are other ways you could initiate the relationship. One would be try to be cool about things and just be friends, give subtle hints until he feels comfortable enough to ask you out. If he doesn't, then you've just saved yourself from a relationship that will obviously get you nowhere (where you'll be the only one to do everything because you're the one who wanted the relationship more in the first place).
What do you think?
For guys: How would it feel for you if you were asked out by a girl? Which would you prefer - you asking her out or her asking you out?
For lades: Have you ever done this before? Would you do it again?
14 responses
@ShepherdSpy (8544)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
12 May 10
I don't think I'd have minded if a girl I found attractive had come over and chatted Me up when I was out clubbing way back..As it Never did happen to Me,I had to go over and make the moves myself!
Re. Your networking buddy-Do you know the full story between this Girl and the Guy She's interested in?
Maybe He's not looking for a relationship just now,or is too reserved to ask Her out,or is happy to just think of Her as a friend? Although,if She's interested in him and hangs out with him for that reason,He'd have to be pretty clueless not to pick up on the signals she'd be giving him..
1 person likes this
@ShepherdSpy (8544)
• Omagh, Northern Ireland
13 May 10
Some guys would have reservations about making a move on a Girlfriend or ex of their best friend..they'd consider the Girl maybe to be off limits for a decent interval until things had broke up! I'd agree on your point about clubs not being the right place to meet someone special -a place to socialise and have fun,yes.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
13 May 10
She actually said that this guy was the best friend of the person who has been courting her. They aren't close but she's attracted to him.
Anyhow, I think the club or bars are places where you're there to find someone in the first place which is why it would be okay if the girl approaches a guy. But it's not a venue to find the person you're going to marry.
@redhotpogo (4401)
• United States
12 May 10
All my ex girlfriends asked me out. I've never been the type to just walk up to a girl, and put the moves on her. Pickup lines are cheesy, and I've always been a shy guy. I would talk to a girl if she talked to me first, but most likely I would not initiate the conversation. One thing I have noticed though. I'm not sure if it really means anything or not, but all my ex's turned out to be easy cheats. I've only ever asked one girl out, and now I'm married to her.
1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
12 May 10
There you go.
I've always thought that girls who ask men out are easy girls. They can't wait nor feel confident that a person would ask them out so they do the deed first. Only to complain in the end that they're not treated right.
Congratulations for asking your wife out.
@rajaiv0810 (1012)
• Philippines
13 May 10
I don't see anything wrong about it. I've asked several men out before but it didn't mean I would like them to be my boyfriend instantly. I asked them out because I want to hang out and get to know them better. Most of them remained my friends. There was one who actaully became my boyfriend but it didn't last, we're still friends. Besides you are not going to bring them flowers and kneel down in front of them and ask them out. It's just a casual asking like "hey are you free? let's have dinner". It doesn't need to be romantic all the time immediately.
1 person likes this
@madteaparty (2748)
• Japan
13 May 10
Wow, I felt like I went back 20 years on time. Are there really still people who think that only boys have to ask out girls?
Don`t be offended, that`s not my intention, but it sounds extremely old fashioned 
Not all boys are so straightforward, there are many shy people, and if one of the people is shy, unless the other one takes a step forward, nothing is going to happen, so it`s ok in both situations, boy or girl asking out.
For me there`s no difference between a boy and a girl asking out, some boys as well as some girls just think they`re not liked by the other person to take a step forward and when they`re asked out they snap out of their error and start a nice relationship 
Not all boys are so straightforward, there are many shy people, and if one of the people is shy, unless the other one takes a step forward, nothing is going to happen, so it`s ok in both situations, boy or girl asking out.
For me there`s no difference between a boy and a girl asking out, some boys as well as some girls just think they`re not liked by the other person to take a step forward and when they`re asked out they snap out of their error and start a nice relationship 1 person likes this
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
13 May 10
Yeah, I guess it does take you back 20years on time, but in those years relationships weren't as complicated as now. It's all about equality - when women want to do what men do but expect to be treated like a lady still.
It may seem that there's no difference between a girl asking a man our and a man asking a girl out. But we all know that emotionally, both are different. If you want your man to 'wear the pants', he should start by wanting you first. Don't you think?
It's all about equality - when women want to do what men do but expect to be treated like a lady still.
It may seem that there's no difference between a girl asking a man our and a man asking a girl out. But we all know that emotionally, both are different. If you want your man to 'wear the pants', he should start by wanting you first. Don't you think?
@zedrick_11 (931)
• Philippines
13 May 10
its fine for me.. atleast she has that power to say what she wants unlike girls that cries because the one they like or love has another one because shes afraid when shes the one who ask the guy out he would think that shes an easy girl..
1 person likes this
@Civic_Racer (33)
• Philippines
13 May 10
its nothing new to me if a girl ask a guy out. its just old fashion when girls still wait for the guy to ask them out.
1 person likes this
@urbandekay (18278)
•
12 May 10
You sound very old fashioned, in UK it is quite normal
all the best urban
1 person likes this
@nAyOhMi14 (298)
• Philippines
12 May 10
In our generation now, I guess it's not a big deal anymore for most of us. But I'm not saying all of us. For me, it hits our pride for being a girl/woman.
1 person likes this
@cowboyofhell (3063)
• Philippines
12 May 10
I don't think it will work. Considering that women only whine after marriage better cut off the relationship in the first place. Who ask her or him? Neither have to, end of the story. The clouds are just too high to reach except when your in Baguio 
.
.1 person likes this
@Idealisticgirl (392)
• Philippines
12 May 10
I never done it before and got no plans to do it either. It's against the law of "Mga Dalagang Filipina".. We Filipinos are conservative and that thing is not normal for us!
1 person likes this
@CynicalStephen (283)
• New Zealand
12 May 10
I wish girls would ask me out Lmao. It'd be easier to sit there and get girls coming up to you rather than having to go through the nervousness of asking a girl out because if I'm the being asked out , I have all the power. I have the power whether to say yes or no. To break or make someone. That's what I hate about asking people out. They could reject you and end up making you feel bad about yourself. Lower your self esteem.
@maxyl12 (236)
• Philippines
13 May 10
I wont mind if a girl ask me out which is they mostly do. Im a type of guy who like to wait if someone asking me out. But I don't decline it if it was a girls asking me out. Its pretty normal. I mean we are just person that has feelings. I don't on the issue on which is better boys or girls. For me every one of us is treated equally.
