Children vs Family

United States
May 16, 2010 10:01pm CST
Okay, as a mother if you husband has people in his family.. or people in your family for that matter.. that you know are bad influences for your children would you keep your children away from them or keep allowing them to see the person because they are family... I don't care what kind of bad influence.. any kind that as a mother you don't think is good for your children to be around?
1 person likes this
12 responses
• United States
17 May 10
It depends on the family member, depends on how "bad" of a person they are. I have a relative who's spouse is a jerk to put it nicely and I don't allow my kids around this person w/o me. And even then I make it short, I love the blood relative just not the spouse's behavior and I will not stand for it. Now if they are into illegal activities definatly not! No way do they need to be around that. To me associating with such folks makes the attitudes, the behavior, and activies seem "ok".. KWIM? I know someone who let their tweens-teen hang out last summer with some unsavory relatives and the kids thought the behavior was COOL! They didn't see the wrong, they saw the cool of that lifestyle.
1 person likes this
• United States
17 May 10
I agree with what everyone else has been saying. If someone is a bad influence it's your responsibility as a parent to make sure they are protected from that influence. Obviously some things will be different for different ages, but family member or not you should keep them from those influences.
17 May 10
I am very lucky i have never had to experience this first hand however if someone was a bad influence i would definitely try to keep them away from my children or at least limit contact xx
• India
17 May 10
hi how r u? in family mean's group of family members then in that family children's are mainly.In same time there is hurting problem's between child an family members in more problems............I don't care what king of bad influence...........any kind that as a mother you don't think is good for your children to be around? that you know are bad influences for your children would you keep your children away from them or keep allowing them to see the person because they are family...........
• United States
17 May 10
there are people that are bad influences. my older children i usually just tell them what that person is doing is wrong. for my small preschooler, i am always around and the people who are bad influences are warned that they will not be invited to see my kids anymore if they don't cut it out
@dfcar47 (15)
• United States
17 May 10
As a mother it would be hard to keep my children from family members reguardless of their influences on them. Let me say I would however not leave my children alone with undesirable persons no matter what the relationship is to them. If a childs behavior started to mimic a behavior I(and/or my spouse)felt unacceptable in our home I would mention to the child in front of the person who is showing this misbehavior.I would say "that so-and-so may not see this as bad" but in our home or lifestyle we do not approve nor do we want to see this behavior again. Be prepared to answer all questions from everyone present as to your decision and stand your ground.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
17 May 10
hi LillyBelleDaisyRose Indeed I would and have kept my children away from people who are bad influences even if they are family. One has a responsibility to protect your children, and that is protecting' one children from bad influences. But on the other hand I would make really sure that the person really is a bad influence, and not just a one time thing. this will of course cause some strain in the family relationships but you cannot let your small children be around some one who will influence them to do things you do not ever want to see them do.
@ifa225 (14461)
• Indonesia
17 May 10
yeah i agree with you. it is not good for my children to be around because i am afraid that bad influences will infect to my kids. i will keep them away as far as i could.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
17 May 10
Luckily there are no members of my family or in my husband's family that I think are bad influences on our children. So, this is not a bridge that we have ever had to cross. However, if there were people in our family that I did feel like were a bad influence of my children, I would not make my children stay completely away from them. Meaning that they would be able to see the people during large family functions, but these wouldn't be people that I would go out of my way to visit when we weren't having family functions.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
17 May 10
I think we all have some bad influences in our families if we look deep enough. Some are more bold than others. Sometimes your children can see that it is not a good idea to be around someone. Sometimes they see the person as a hero. Circumstances may control the outcome of these relationships.
@Soleil05 (136)
• United States
17 May 10
Since we live far away from both my husbands and my family, a situation like that does not really exist here, but if there was, I certainly would not leave my children alone with someone who could be a bad influence.. if it'd be that there are situations where that person would be around, I'd make sure I would be there with them or at least someone else I would trust.
• Philippines
17 May 10
With my family, I value our privacy. At first stage of my marriage, I lived with my husband's family and I am so aggravated since they made all the decisions and I don't have peace of mind. Though, I am glad to belong to a family that are of good influence to my kids but if it does happen that they were a bad influence, I would rather prefer to leave the house and take my kids with me or they should leave, depends on the situation. Now, we have our own house and we have peace of mind. I don't worry about meddling family members anymore.