I'm Not A Woman Unless I'm Pregnant
By vjenkins86
@vjenkins86 (1478)
United States
May 18, 2010 4:09pm CST
Okay, I've never been pregnant so I don't know how it feels, but I recently heard about this phenomenon where there are women who do not feel complete or whole unless they are pregnant. Once they are pregnant, they are happy. Then they go through the full 9 months, give birth and take care of the baby. However, they get that urge to become pregnant again so they do. Before anyone knows it, she has more kids than she can handle but she still wants to be pregnant. I think the reporter doing this story said it had something to do with a mental illness or something like that, I can't remember exactly. Now, I've been skeptical about this but I'm not sure. Maybe there are women out there who feel like it is their duty to be pregnant.
Do you know or have heard of women who fit that description?
1 person likes this
12 responses
@med889 (5941)
•
19 May 10
My neighbor is like this and she fits the description perfectly, she is pregnant with her fourth child and her sister in law does not have any so the mother in law will constantly taunt her saying that she is the perfect woman while the other is an incomplete one.
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
19 May 10
I’m sure most women feel that way that’s why most of us are so happy to be pregnant and give birth. Its not easy…the 9 months and then the actual child-birth…then bringing up that baby, but its some kind of fulfillment from within. Its just like every tree has its fruit, so every woman feels complete after becoming a mother maybe coz we are psychologically tuned that way. Understanding nature is not easy but at least this much I understand that its nature’s scheme of things that women or the female gender in animals have this strong urge to procreate and not only that, but to mate with the best and pass on the best genes to the next generation.
Of course there are many women out there (couples in fact DINK – Double Income No Kid) who feel that kids are more of an impediment to their career and they remain childless…there are women who cant conceive due to medical problems but that in no way makes a less woman of them.
1 person likes this
@Netsbridge (3253)
• United States
19 May 10
Whether or not mental illness is also a part of this mindset does not change the fact that there are indeed some women who mistake motherhood for womanhood. And women who mistake motherhood for womanhood often end up very, very miserable and are most likely to abuse and/or kill their children when they finally realize that they still feel worthless after child bearing.
Contrary to popular belief, child bearing is neither an accomplishment nor the completion of womanhood. Having children for a man who does not love, respect and cannot reward you, woman, for helping him further his lineage is not going to get you anywhere! Children are properties of their fathers. Therefore, if a man does not love, respect and cannot reward you enough, you, sister, ought to have no business having children!
@macdingolinger (10386)
• United States
19 May 10
So what happens when she gets too old to bear children? Is she no longer a woman? Maybe she'll have 18 kids by then and will be too tired to care! lol!
@kbrown3 (2)
• United States
18 May 10
IM 23 and have never been pregnant either. But I had a friend who never wanted to have kids and she had got pregnant and not even a week after she gave birth she was out trying to get pregnant again. She was in therepy at the time and her therapist had told her that it was all in her head, its an emotinal thing you go through after pregnancy.
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
18 May 10
Wow. That is something. I know your hormones and emotions are heightened and go under changes when you're pregnant, but I've never actually heard of a personal story like that. Thank goodness your friend did see someone about it, though.
@apples99 (6556)
• United States
19 May 10
I'm much older then the two of you I'm pretty sure. and I've never been nor do I want to get pregnant right now, not that I dont like children because I do like children in fact I have a cute Niece that I love, but I've seen first hand how dificult having and raising a child can be and its not all fun and games, and in these tough times can be very stressful, and its just not something I take lightly.
Sure baby's are cute and sweet and motherhood can be beautiful, but it can also be very stressful for women's body and mind, and a child should not be brought into the world unless a person is fully ready or as ready as they can be, for me I dont want to even consider having kids unless my life is completely stable and can provide the child with a good life and maybe some of the things I never had and I dont know when or if I'll ever feel stable enough to have kids I'm taking financially and emotionally, of course, though sometimes motherhood can occur when god decides not always when a women decides shes ready.
But a woman's worth is not, and should not be centered around being a mother, nor do I think that a women's only purpose in life is to have kids in fact its nonsense to me. I believe that having the ability and choice to have kids is a gift that should only be unwrapped at the right moment in time and those who may not want to have kids right away or at all should not be judged, because I've seen and heard too many children living a hard life filled with poverty and disappointment all because a women or unprepared teen who wasn't ready had a child, but who suffers the most are the children, so I say agin having children is very serous business.
1 person likes this
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
19 May 10
You are so right apples99. A child is a huge responsibility that should not be taken lightly. There is so many things that need to be taken into account before starting a family. Also, a woman's worth should never be linked to her ability to be a mother. Thank you for responding and happy mylotting.
@sizzle3000 (3036)
• United States
18 May 10
Some women are like that but no you don't HAVE to get pregnant to feel that happy and fulfilled. My daughter is married and was told she can't have kids. This is proof that you don't have to be pregnant because she is so happy right now. It took her a while to accept the fact she would't be able to have kids but now that she has she's extremely happy and as a matter of fact in a couple years they've decided to adopt.
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
18 May 10
I completely agree. You don't need to physically have a baby to be happy, just like you don't have to physically have the child to be that child's true parents. I'm sorry to hear about your daughter but it sounds like she is doing well which is great. I hope the adoption process goes nice and smooth for her.
@creative_genius (992)
•
19 May 10
I've not heard of anyone who has a condition like that. I've never been pregnant so I cannot comment. Must be awful on the kids to have a mother so mixed up like that. With the world slowly becoming overpopulated I don't think it would matter if I chose not to have any children. I don't believe that it is a woman's duty to have children.
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
19 May 10
I'm not even sure if those mothers think about their other children's welfare. Which is sad. Thanks for responding.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
19 May 10
I'Ve never heard of such women. I guess it is a mental illness. Maybe they just feel like they're human when they're belly is big. Lol. Maybe they think that the sole purpose of women are to bore a child that's why they think like that.
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
19 May 10
I'Ve never heard of such women. I guess it is a mental illness. Maybe they just feel like they're human when they're belly is big. Lol. Maybe they think that the sole purpose of women are to bore a child that's why they think like that.
@madteaparty (2748)
• Japan
19 May 10
Well, I have never heard of anything as extreme as that 
Many females have that tic tac of their biological clock in their ears all the time, and want to have a kid at any cost, but I still haven't felt that.
Maybe some people have a mother instint stronger than others.
Many females have that tic tac of their biological clock in their ears all the time, and want to have a kid at any cost, but I still haven't felt that.
Maybe some people have a mother instint stronger than others.@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
19 May 10
Those dang biological clocks. lol. My mom never wanted kids until her biological clock rang so loud in her ear that she decided to have one- me. lol. There are some people who do love to mother others and take care of others, but I would rather they mentor/adopt/become a foster parent before having a 8 or 12 children. oh well. Thanks for responding. Happy mylotting.
@ndubose (418)
• United States
19 May 10
Well I never heard that one I have no kids at the moment but I consider that a blessing because I am not at the right place in life I have a great relationship and the not the best financial stability....Which I feel is important when it comes to raising or even starting a family I feel more like a woman because I am being responsible....I think you are a great woman as well with or without the motherhood....
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
19 May 10
I completely agree with you that you need to take everything into consider, especially your financial stability before you think of venturing into motherhood. Thanks for responding and happy mylotting
