feeling bad enough something she makes me feel worst.
By syankee525
@syankee525 (6249)
United States
May 24, 2010 5:50am CST
well i am not shy, yeah i am pretty much poor one on my side of the family as well as my wife side too.
we are both disable, and we often dont have money to do extra things. and most of the time either my dad will help us out or someone on my wife side will too.
i feel bad enough because i am the man i belive i should be able supporte my house, and be out there doing whatever to make extra money. but im recovery from my neck operation, but i also got a mess up spin as well, bad knees and shoulder too.
but we sat here yesterday ask being ask to go out and eat with her family. she told them we dont have no money until wednesday. well of course her sister told us that she got us cover.
my wife was like i hate this, having someone pay for us, and then later said something about how she would like to have a house with a wrap around porch. i just told her yeah one day your husband might become rich and get you one, might when we're almost died. but i often tell her you could always go out and find yourself a real man who can support you better and is able to buy you things you want.
when i make statment she get upset with me, you have medical issues why you cant work. thinking to myself ok then why do she bring this stuff up still knowing how i feel about this. ive even told her when she feels bad it makes me feel bad.
now i do love her, but often think maybe i should just leave then she can find some other man who have money to give her all the crap she wants.
do your spouce make you feel this way
4 people like this
6 responses
@meimeibaobei (292)
• China
24 May 10
hi,my friend!the difficult will gone one day.don't worry and be anxious.believe in me,everything will get better slowly.and you will have make you and your lover happy,i believe.so,don't give up.just do it and everything will be ok!!have a nice day!!
@reckon21 (3477)
• Philippines
20 Jun 10
Syankee...I understand how you feel and many of us feels the same way you do. You are not alone in this world there are many people like us. I also have an illness which stop me from fulfilling my lifelong dreams to become a Police Officer. All do I am a Criminology graduates and a board passer too I can't undergo training because I have a swelling in some veins of my lungs...the doctors says I can't do some stressful works especially training.
That dampens everything in my life and I felt hopeless. Lucky to me I am single and don't have any obligation from anybody except perhaps to my sisters who sustain me financially. Good thing they understand my situations and always been protective.
As for your wife I felt sorry for her too but what can we do sometimes destiny plays a cruel game and we are the unwilling participant. Just be strong enough and be strong for her because she sometimes feel weaken. I wish us all the best.
@spalladino (17891)
• United States
31 May 10
yankee, don't make me and Dink come back to Maryland and slap you silly! 
Your wife loves you and she doesn't want to replace you with someone else so don't even think about leaving. I'm sure she doesn't mean to hurt your feelings when she talks about the things she'd like to have...she's just dreaming and talking. It's frustrating when you can't work...but you CAN'T work. It would be a different story if you just didn't want to work. You are a real man in every sense of the word...a good husband and father...and don't ever forget that.
Your wife loves you and she doesn't want to replace you with someone else so don't even think about leaving. I'm sure she doesn't mean to hurt your feelings when she talks about the things she'd like to have...she's just dreaming and talking. It's frustrating when you can't work...but you CAN'T work. It would be a different story if you just didn't want to work. You are a real man in every sense of the word...a good husband and father...and don't ever forget that.
@Porcospino (31365)
• Denmark
25 May 10
Sometimes my husband has the same kinds of thoughts, because we are both ill and he is sad that he can't buy me the things that I want. Sometimes he says that I ought to find a rich man or a man who can work so that I would be able to buy the things I want. I always tell him that I don't want anyone else, and I mean it. We are probably never going to get rich, but we have eachother, that means a lot more to me than having a expensive house and a lot of things. I feel that the love between us is much more valuable than money.
Maybe your wife feels the same way, and maybe she feels that YOU are more important than a house with a wrap around porch or other things that money can buy.
@tigeraunt (6326)
• Philippines
13 Jun 10
dear syankee,
i am a wife and being told like that is so hurtful coming from the husband who i rely on so much. words could be so sharp you know. i would also be upset.
i know you said that too because of the frustration of not being able to give her the nice things she wants.
id rather say that you both should be more sensitive of each others feelings. Let the love flow.. not the hateful words.
cheer up,
ann
@much2say (57377)
• Los Angeles, California
24 May 10
Sorry to hear about all you're going through. I will say this . . . don't tell her that she can always find a better man. I had a friend who's hubby used to tell her that all the time and she felt really sad to hear that from him. You might mean that in jest, but it can be hurtful to her . . . it's almost like telling her to go away, even if you don't mean it. So if she reacts to you, then you might react back - then everyone is just upset over a bunch of statements. Sounds like it's a real touchy time, so stay positive - and to each other - as much as possible. Be more supportive in letting her know you can take care of each other and that somehow someway you'll both get through it . . . and hopefully she'll be more positive too.
