An unlucky man's life

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My wife who has live with me for 5 years went away with other man. Fighting for a friend, and was detained for 18 days, and paid the medical expenses myself after going out. Resigned after the usurper of subordinates. Rent a house but the wall is too thin, had to listen to the voice of making love of the next door, and it is a man's voice. Met a girl on MSN, i didn't know she have divorced before the first date, and her son is only one year younger than me, he hunts down me every day, say that his mother divorced beacause of me! God, you have divorced 2 years before meeting me, but you insisted that it is the premonition of the woman! Playing with my dog at home, i command him to sit down, he rolled, i order him to roll, he inverted. He ate my clothes when he was hungry, never ate his dog food, and steal garlic in the refrigerator to eat while i fell asleep at night. I say whether you are a dog in the end or not? i go to street with you because i want you can help me talk with a girl, but you always go along with the old lady. once the beauty touches you, you has a bowel movement! I was very sad when i gave you to my friend, but you, you looked as if you had see your father when you saw that my friend! I want to lose weight, go hungry every day. one day i could not bear it ,bought a lot of tomatoes, and poisoned after eating them. I spent 8 dollars buying a YOGa cd, and praticed four days, twisting my neck, until now both my shoulder are not at the same height, the girls said i was abnormal when they saw me. I want to play a romantic evening, did candllight dinner myself, but burned the bed. my mother thought that i wanted to self-immolation because of losing love, so she sent me to mental clinic for 2 days. just now, when i wrote this post, the computer automatically shut down twice. No cigarette, i wanted to find butts in the trash, my hand was pierced by a thumbtacks.