If one really understands another person then they can never really hate them

I love Ender's Game as well as the other books in that series! I've always been that person who tries to think "well they must have a reason for why they did that." I try to find the good in everyone and try to remember they have feelings and problems like everyone else. This is not always easy and it can sometimes get me hurt when this person decides to walk over me and my trust.My friends often ask me to mediate disagreements because I can always see both sides very well and can express understanding. The people who have hurt me in my life, I don't truly hate any of them. Besides it's wasted time and energy for me to hate someone for something in my past :)

Sometimes you cannot prevent hating a person. You cannot prevent yourself from extremely disliking a person if he/she have done harm to you.Yes a mediator would help cause they are the one who can see both side of the situation. But sometimes no matter how you try to understand why the person has done evil to you, still you will hate him/her. I've heard lots of news about rape victims and massacres. How would you accept and understand the motive of the those people who are responsible for the killing and abusing of innocent people.

maybe not like others would be the worst turn out of understanding people. but hate? yes, you're correct. no one can hate anyone if one understands them. one can thus stay away and/or adjust to people they don't like.

Yeah, that's a really good point, that's why I guess they say that communication is really important, because if you just listen, then maybe you'll begin to understand each other. There are a lot of people who are just really stubborn, who doesn't want to listen and doesn't really want to understand others, they just want their point to be taken and their views to be followed and that's it. I guess, there is no hope for these kind of people.

yeah but there are times you still hate a person despite the fact that you understand him/her. i have experienced that.

i don't hate people that i don't like or that try to hurt me, i just ignore them and move on with my life

But then that's always been the problem from the very beginning of this world. men have difficulty understanding each other. Even brother and sisters would betray and kill each other for some misunderstanding and conflict. If quarrels and conflict happens inside the home then it is much worst in the outside world beyond the home where people don't have blood relation with each other. If only people will take time to understand each other then maybe we can finally achieve the peace that this world of ours desperately seeking for quite a long time. When you try to understand other people the feeling of hatred no longer existed.

you don't need to hate a person, just because you don't understand his reasons..in other words, whether you understand or not a person's motives for doing something, you don't need to hate a person.. cause hate is like an acid that will harm more its container (yourself, in this case) than to the things around it. it is much better to say that if we understand a person's motives, we might not judge them for what they have done. by understanding their motives or what triggered them to do such abhorable things, you will see them in different light..and you will not condemn them..by understanding their motives, we might not be able to forgive them,but at least we won't totally condemn them..

When you are dealing with certain types of people it depends on what you are understanding of a person because some things you might understand but do not agree, having a bunch of anger is triggering a affect of your, emotions and somethings will making you feel like you hate a person, how many times have you heard a women tell a man she hates him, or a child tellin gtheir parents that they hate them, when you say the word its just alot of frustration. Then when people do that some people take it to far because then you have people killing eachother over that. Understanding goes along way, thats if im hanging with my girls and they decide to steal from a store because they don't have any money I would understand the fact that they dont have money, but to hang with them, then I would get caught I would say naw im good but I wouldnt hate them for that I would just keep my distance when we go to the store. Now when it comes to murders and rapest, Im not going to lye their is no understanding their Because they caused bodly harm to someone I cared about and they took a life, so being in a mind state of dealing with that, yes I would hate them and their is no telling, so I would have to say it would depend on the situation at hand.

yes u r right in some case not all the case if u r understand each other very well that dont means u cant hate b'coz some time it happens when u r in problem or some kind of mental stress then u hate some one if he/or she just ask something and u r angry u r bored all the day yhis question and slowly u r fight and hate someone

I think If we donot understand a person than our relationship with this person is not interesting. If we need a real relation with a person than we need to definetly understood the person. It not possible in our life to understand all person. I not understand every person. Also I don't try to understand every person. But Some person I know well i understand them and the relation with the person with me very closed.

Proper or full understanding of another person is on a need to know basis. If I am walking down the street I don't need to know that other person, but if I work with that person than I need to understand them. My point is we as people choose to know or not know a person. When we choose to know the person most of the time there is an underlined reason. If I want to get ahead at work I will know and understand everything I can about the person that stands in my way. By doing so I can manipulate the situation to get ahead, Now with that said, it sounds crude and overbearing, but it is the truth in most cases. So that is how I view some of those 'get to know someone' situations.