would you throw him out?

Like the first few responses here, I would also set a rent-amount that he should be paying. If he can't meet that, then he has to go. But if he comes up with the money, then I shouldn't care what he does with his time. He could play video games all day for all I care. As long as when it is rent-payment time, he has the money.

I will definately throw him out, sweetie. If he can play freaking games the whole day, i am sure he has enough energy to go job hunting. TATA.

Hi, cher913. If he is paying you and if he is not disturbing you, I would let him stay. If he is not forfeiting the lease agreement by doing something that he is not supposed to do, then he could live in the place for a little while. If he does not give you guys anymore money to rent the area, then I would give him a certain amount of time to get out. If he would come and talk to us, I may could work something out with him.

Is his child with him or the wife? If he is there alone and shows no signs of actually finding a job to pay his bills, say good-bye. Give him a thirty-day notice. If he gives you trouble, check with your police department on proper procedures for getting him out of your house. Some states make it almost impossible to get rid of renters or even someone who just moves into a property without permission. If you don't do it the right way, HE can sue YOU. I used to work in the Foreclosures Dept of a company, handling Massachusetts and Florida. They bought up the properties and sometimes found people inside who were not there legally. They had just moved themselves in. In Massachusetts, not only, did it take forever to move them out, our company was forced to provide water and heat in the winter! The state also provided classes to renters to show them ways to avoid removal! It took two years to get one woman out of a $2,000,000 property her previous boyfriend rented for her. When he stopped, although she made over $1,000,000 a year herself, she refused to pay rent or condo fees. She took her case through every court in Massachusetts, because according to state rules, she could. In Florida, it took six weeks to have the sheriff remove a non-paying renter or person not in the property legally.

I'd feel the same, but before I kick him out, I think I'd like to try to have a talk with him first... I'd still be concerned about his kid anyway. So if he seems to be responsive and is positively taking my advice in mind, I'll let him stay. See if there will be some improvements. But if he decides to stay that way, I'll just make up some reasons to tell him to make him leave the house.

Can't throw someone out that way. I guess, you should talk to him first but if you already did, pushing him to something more to do than throwing is more valuable to do from your time. I guess, he just a lonely or frustrated since he has no family.

well now you know why he was homeless, give him a set rent amount. If he does not meet it - boot him out!

You're not helping him, you're allowing him to take advantage of your kindness. You are encouraging him to be a bum and neglect his responsibilities. Hard to say who is worse really. I wonder if you are reading your responses??

I think it's a case of finding out why he isn't pushing himself and possibly consider trying to aid that, of course he might not be interested in doing more as certain people would rather do nothing and in that case I would say your best throwing him out. I would still probably offer him help, just not a place that he could take for granted. For others reasons such as not processing the confidence to move forward, sometimes support will just do that.

I would like to say yes and mean it, but I don't think I could. On the other hand, I could make him leave on his own.

Hi Cher, I would give him a warning first by saying he either gets a job and pays a set amount of rent each week by the end of this month as we are just into June or he will have to look for somewhere else to stay. All the time he is allowed to lounge around playing games rather than face up to his responsibilites of a being an adult and a parent also he will do nothing. How is he managing to provide for his family? Huggles. Ellie :D

Definitely threw him out. You had done your sympathy for him long enough, and you should think about do him a favor. Let him earn some money instead of sitting there doing nothing. He should feel a little responsibility himself too. Don't do charity any more.

Many such instances occur in life, sometimes I wonder why some have to face problems of this fashion in life. This is because of immaturity of for some other problem. Any how - we should live in this world a peaceful life and hence should avoid such persons who give trouble.

i agree it's very hard and in theory you should throw him out. but think about it he's obviously very depressed and lonely with noone but you and your husband, think about if it was you would you want someone to do that to you if you were in a bad place? his head is not in the right place to better himself

One more thng to remember, You can't help a person that isn't interested in helping themselves.

I wouldn't throw him out right away, but I would make it clear that I expect him to look for a job and start saving for a place.

I would tell him that he has to pay a certain amount monthly or weekly and, if he doesn't, he'll have to find another place to live. He sounds like he needs a good dose of tough love, also known as a boot in the derriere. He needs a fire lit under his behind and money is an excellent motivator, so is homelessness. Yeah, I'd definitely let him know that a certain amount is expected on time, monthly, bi-monthly or weekly, whichever you choose and, if it's not received he'll have a specific amount of time (say, 30 days) to get his things together and get out. I had to use tough love on my younges son because nothing else worked with him. It hurt me to have to do it but now I'm so glad I did! He's turned his life around and is doing much better these days.

Tell him he's going to have to start paying room and board and explain that it's too expense to allow him to freeload. Tell him what you're going to charge per week or month and then give him a certain amount of time to find a job. Don't put up with any excuses. It's either start paying or find somewhere else to live.

If he is not related to you or a really good friend you should evict him. If he is someone you care about you and hubby should give him a serious talking to and tell him he needs to get his act together. You may want to see if there is a tenants and landlord association where you live that can give you legal advice. I missed the story about the dude in Florida.

Well, back in the fall we had a guy that stayed with us for a while because he didn't have transportation and was working with my husband at the time. It was very hard on me to have someone living in our house (even though temporarily) and I really didn't know what to do. He was, however, contributing to our well being and it was getting cold outside so my heart would not let me tell him that he needed to go. That said, it is a difficult decision to make so in a situation like this I really feel like you have to follow your heart.