How do you handle a naughty kid in the neighborhood?
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
United States
June 14, 2010 12:07pm CST
We have finally made the decision that we will be moving in with my father in law shortly... we're just working on preparing his house for us, like cleaning, etc.
In the meantime we've been spending some time hanging out over there, letting the kids play in the yard while we do some work here and there, stuff like that.
Well there's a little boy who lives up the street that my kids know from school, and whenever we go over there the boy comes up to play with my kids. At first he seemed fine, until the other day my oldest told me this little boy was doing some naughty things. Apparently he hit my younger kids, made my 4 year old do something that hurt himself.. all this while we were on the other side of the yard digging out the septic tank to get that drained.
Yesterday we bought some toys for my kids to play with in the yard, like sidewalk chalk and some balls. My 7 year old got a foam airplane to play with, and he was having so much fun. Until the other boy came over and wouldn't let my son play with the airplane anymore, and he was being too rough with it.. we thought he was going to break it, so we finally put it away. Then when my daughter was playing hopscotch the boy stole her rock, interrupting her game. I even caught him trying to tell my 2 year old to jump into a little hole that a dog dug into the yard. It wouldn't have hurt my son if he had jumped in it, but he probably would have fallen down due to losing his balance. We spoke to him a few times, told him he wasn't being nice.. and we had to tell him to get off the riding lawnmower. None of this seemed to phase him.. he did stop the current behavior but then he'd move on to another bad behavior.
All I can think of is what are we going to do once we move there and this little boy wants to come over and play with my kids every day? Should I be mean and tell my kids they can't play with him? (I'm no good with speaking to other parents, because they usually take offense and get rude, and I'm not willing to deal with that conflict unless I have to).
I'm sure almost everyone has had to deal with a naughty kid in their neighborhood.. so what did you do about it?
5 responses
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
14 Jun 10
I would talk directly to the kid. When he comes to play, you say "You may play with the kids but if I hear that you are being bad, I am going to send you home." I've had to do this before. A Guilty kid usually won't tell his parents what he's been up to and why he can't play with certain kids anymore because he fears getting in trouble at home too. So you probably don't have to worry about hearing from the parents even if you ban the kid.
If you kick him out of the yard, you can always give him another chance later. You could say "Today you are being mean and I think you should go. We could try this another day if you can learn how to behave, otherwise maybe you shouldn't play here anymore".
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
14 Jun 10
That is probably what I'll have to do.. though I don't feel comfortable speaking to someone else's child that way. My mom was the same.. she'd yell at me when my friends were misbehaving. She'd tell me to tell them not to do certain things. Guess I just have to get over it.
1 person likes this
@rocketj1 (6955)
• United States
14 Jun 10
If you can do it calmly and coolly, I believe kids have a respect for you. It's how good teacher's do it. Maybe you have to picture yourself as a teacher. I think I had a problem with correcting other children when my kids were little but eventually I got over it. Once in awhile a good "Hey! We don't do that here!" can get your point across too. I find myself doing this at church if some kids are horsing around in the lobby or something. They may not even know who I am, but they know I'm an adult and I rarely have to repeat myself.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
15 Jun 10
Kids don't seem to respect adults anymore though. This boy was acting wildly and doing these things right in front of us, and I said to my husband.. when I was a kid I would have been petrified to behave so wildly in front of someone else's parents.. I was always shy when my friend's parents were nearby.
@chezkalangi11 (46)
• Philippines
15 Jun 10
I will tell her scary stories like ghost or about animals like for example worms, ants, frog etc. in order to make her quiet and to be able to get medicine. Sometimes I buy her foods that she wants.
@dawnald (85146)
• Shingle Springs, California
21 Jun 10
Sounds like my nephew. And we just address each behavior as it comes up. If it were a neighbor's child, I'd probably do the same thing unless it got to the point where it wasn't helping and I didn't want them around any more.
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
15 Jun 10
Hey kats~ Wow! That's a really difficult situation and very
uncomfortable one to be in. But, there is always a child like
that in someone's neighborhood and I've seen plenty in mine!
And, honestly, "nipping it in the bud" as they say is the best
way to deal with it! I think in other words, deal with it fast
and seriously! You need to get this kid gone! He sounds like
the "evil seed" or "Damian"! Seriously, someone like this is
not a good influence, a could definitely be a danger to your
kids and not worth taking a chance with. So, if you don't want
the aggravation of a "face off with parents" at some point, tell
him he can't come over any more and be just that blunt! This
kid is definitely "TROUBLE"!
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
15 Jun 10
He's not really a bad seed.. just wild, hyper, and slightly uncontrolled.. my kids are the same way when I'm not right on top of them, though I don't think they'd go so far as to hit someone else, especially someone younger than them. But I can't be sure that he did hit my kids.. that was just hear say from my 13 year old. Though I will be keeping a closer eye when this boy is over, and will certainly be sending him home if he causes any further trouble.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
26 Jun 10
We have a couple of kids in our neighborhood that are just like the little boy that you are talking about. I've been to talk to their father a few times (typically after something that I find to be particularly offense or dangerous) and I've found that this doesn't do any good at all. So now when they cause trouble with my children I will tell them that they aren't allowed to the troublemaker for a period of time and see after that if the other child's behavior had changed, I will allow them to play again.
