Would date someone who's not yet divorced?

Please don't get mad at me, but a man who loves you will not take you in a relationship when he knows your reputation and emotions as a girl is at risk. Though we are in the year 2010 respect and love values doesn't change a bit. When a man loves you he values everything about you. You are a special girl and a man who will take you should pay the price to have you. Money or whatever that will hinder him to give you a life that you deserve is not reasons enough to put you in that place he should have done something even before he ask you on your first date. Love should be clear to one another by words and by actions, you don't need to wait for a man whose professing his love to you for two years and still married to another woman. You deserve someone better. And don't worry about your age, it doesn't count. You know what God wants us to do while are men are still out there longing for us? He wants us to be prepared emotionally, physically, intelectually, spiritually,,,every area of our life must be prepared so when He send us to them we are ready to start a life with someone. Its not hard to live with someone when you already settled all the things you have to settle as an individual...God bless! Aja! Ask God for every decision that you make and you will never go astray. Matthew 6:33

I made that mistake once. He told me he was "getting" a divorce, showed me divorce papers, his wife told me they were splitting, then when I started demanding some action, I became a "complication in his life" and he went back to wifey-poo. I was 5 weeks preg at the time. Yes he knew. So did she. Near as I can figure, it was all a game they were playing on me. Why buy the cow when you get the milk for free. I would not be waiting two years for the guy to finalize his divorce. If it takes more than a few months, he's just jerking you around.

Hi, jonnifc. I am very sorry about this. I don't really know what to tell you. If he is still legally married to his wife, I would never choose to be with him at all. This is like you and him are living into Sin together. He really needs to divorce his wife, whether it is expensive or not. My sister-in-law is legally married, to her husband. She has three kids with him. Now, she is with another guy, whom is her boyfriend now. Her and her husband, have been married for about 8 or 9 years, but yet they are not together at all. She has moved on with many other men in her life since then. She has had two baby daddies since then. In actuality she has, 4 baby daddies. Altogether she has 6 kids from all different kinds of men. I could not put myself in this situation. I believe that it is best that you no longer be with him until his divorce is finalized. I really would hate to see you with a broken heart.

A lot of guys are like that. His life is happy now.. he's not with his wife, who he can't stand, and he has a woman he does love. The whole idea of marriage, to a lot of guys, is just paperwork. That's why most men aren't really in a rush to do it. I know a few couples who have been together a long time, but never married, and are perfectly happy. One couple has 5 kids together, been with each other over 10 years, but aren't married. I know another couple where the woman had previously been married, and she had a couple of kids with her husband.. then they split up. She got with another guy and had a baby with him before ever getting her divorce finalized. I say if you're happy, then don't question the rest. Just be content that you're with a man that you love. Of course it wouldn't hurt to give him friendly reminders every so often!

I think most people who get divorced do actually have a relationship with someone whilst they are going through divorce. In fact often people only divorce when they want to re-marry someone else. I see nothing wrong in it and certainly would not stop dating someone just because they hadn't got divorced yet.

sometimes it is difficult to make decision like that! I also have a friend who has the nearly same situation. of course, my friend is male. he still lives with his wife and sometimes with his girlfriend. he told me it is fantastic to have two women at the same time,because both women don't care about it so much even they know each other. the problem is he has a kid who is only 5 years old, otherwise he would have married that girl two years ago. they three still keep this relationship now! For you, my suggestion is to ask your boyfriend about his real feeling deep in the heart and set a deadline to ensure your own future.

hi Jonnifc, My guess is that the reason he is dragging his feet is the cost. I know I put off my own divorce for that reason as well. I ended up doing it fairly cheap by doing it myself which is the cheapest and easiest way possible....and still took me a while to save up for. How long should you wait? Well, I'm sure many would disagree with me but if it were me and if I really really loved the guy then I would wait for as long as it took. My love for someone is not based on a marriage certificate.

I just hate to say this but after reading your title,it hurts me somehow because I am in the same sailing boat.Although mine is already on going process and under the court issue,I feel better.I understand that divorce is a difficult process because they have child and also the custody so I just normally making myself understand the situation around me because I did accept him from the first day I met him.Anyway,for me yes I will wait because I know that everything will be ok and everything will be alright because I have faith and I think positive and I trust him that much.

That's called having your cake and eating it to. I am not sure where you are but where I am at you have to file your annulment with in 1 year of the marriage date. If you do not file with in that first year you have to file for a divorce. I would say that you should not wait any longer. If he wants to be with you he will do what ever it takes to make you happy even if he has to divorce his wife. If I was you I would walk away. I mean he was married when he hooked up with you who is to say that he wont do the same thing to you when he gets bored. Well good luck and I hope that things work out for you.

I have been dating someone who is not divorced as of yet for the past year. I have been allright with this becase the relationship with the ex is over. she simply has to go back to court and get the divorce faiilized. she tryed that last year but the court would not grant her that due to other reasons. I know she won't go back to him and I am secure with her feelings toward me. As for your situation I am not sure. I think if he as serious he would have done that a long time ago. he seem to be draging his feet for some reason. but however anything involving the courts can take a long time. so you sould consider that as well. but if you want him to get it done, just tell that you want it done soon.

A married man still has a bond and commitment to someone else. until that union is dissolved, there is no future in being with a married man. Why put yourself put more turmoil? If he is worth waiting for, wait for him to be a free man again. If not, you may both have regrets.

A divorce can be VERY expensive, VERY time consuming and VERY stressful for everybody involved. They may have gotten married as a mistake but they are making a huge mistake now!!! If they ahd only been married 1 year when they seperated, they could have had an anulment, meaning the marriage never legally took place. Unlike a divorce. This can be done within I thin it is 12 months of the wedding. But after that, a divorce has to be done, which as I said can be very expensive which is probably why he sint going ahead. You cannot marry until his divorce is 100% final, and he has his decree absolut. This could take years if his ex wife causes him problems. Tell him if he is serious to start prceedings now, he does not have to sue his ex and vice versa which will make the divorce very inexpensive toehr than the papers cost.

honestly, i would rather wait for annulment. no offense but still under adultery. i understand how u feel! that you care your feeling and people around you knew also.. but for me i always think for my future kids. what if they experience like what you have gone through.. or let say vise versa. its really falls back to you. better to do is think and asked for signs and guidance up there. because this is between you and him.be happy and good luck