How am I suppose to handle him?
By eM
@eLsMarie (4345)
Philippines
June 16, 2010 8:55pm CST
I had a serious relationship with a guy for almost a year now. At first, as expected, it did well. We communicate, we exchange sweet messages, and we cared so much for each other but now, I feel like I have to have that space. He always remind me that he loves and cares for me but I don't think that he should do it all the time because it really irks me. I confronted him a couple of times already but all he did was to smile or he'll feel bad. He's so good that I can't find ways to spice up the relationship. I wanted something different but it's as if like he's contented of us doing the usual stuffs. I love him but there's something that is lacking and I don't know what exactly it is. 
2 people like this
8 responses
@mrfdg1972 (3237)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
Take a break, i mean slow down a little in your relationship, one term is lie low, try it for a week, no phone calls, no texting, no stalking, no contact, maybe then you will discover what's missing,
Wish me luck.@mrfdg1972 (3237)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
Its an arrange thing, both of you will do the set up, when it begins, the rules, when it ends
@sweetloveforeve (13120)
• Portugal
15 Jul 10
he is too sweet to you and you feel it needs to be a challenge too maybe is that what you feel^^ anyway try to make things that can spice your love life^^ do things that you never did before. not just in s e x but also go to places together where you never been, go swim naked ahah maybe he is just afraid to lose you or that you think he doesnt care enough thats why he is always so caring to you. why dont you try to play difficult for awhile? and see his struggle to have you again? maybe that challenge will help in your love life^^ like the times he was courting you and had to make an effort ^^ im sure it will help you^^
I hate it because I no longer consider it as love but obsession. 
@evasmom09 (132)
• United States
17 Jun 10
I was recently in a relationship like this he never gave me space and it drove me nuts...I went out of town with a friend of mine and after i got back everything went down hill. i constantly told him that i needed space he told me he would work on it but nothing changed... I also told him he needed to stand up for me and he also did not do that...I was with this guy for over a year and everything I think if you can stay with a guy for over a year and still be happy that is a great thing but if you have problems with space most likely things will not work out... Im sorry to say it but that is what happened to me
@adeena2000 (845)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
Maybe one of you the feeling is gone. Don't deny your feelings whatever it is. You have to talk it over seriously, if you want to work out the relationship. Or else, cut it off as early as now, so you won't hurt so much. Find someone else who deserves your love and affection. It is not your lost anyway.
@emma27865 (101)
•
17 Jun 10
Take it in turns to decide what to do. It's a bit like how you would treat a couple of children, it works for me.
Also, you say he is showing you lots of attention and is very attentive, some qualities many many women would be drawn to. Have you ever invisaged him with someone else, giving HER that love and adoration?
Sometimes, we think the grass is greener on the other side.
I hope you work things out
@laydee (12798)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
Perhaps you both have just been spending too much time together. The type where both seem to be doing everything together, sometimes doing such would only create boredom eventually.
Why don't you try to have most activities without him, like going out with girlfriends or doing simple day-to-day things without your partner. I don't think he would resent it.
Hmmm.. I was really struck with your topic because I am like your boyfriend with my boyfriend. I love to communicate, to cuddle, to do things together but I know that there are times when he needs some space. I don't understand that all the time but I do try. We've been together for the last 5years but we're not always together physically because of work.
Somehow, your topic made me think that perhaps I'm too tough on him. 
@eLsMarie (4345)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
I think you really are laydee. 
We both have the same experience but we're the exact opposite. I think we should lessen the time that we're together because it's as if like there's no more thrill and excitement. My ex doesn't have any time for me and my current boyfriend always has so both are very much unhealthy. 
We both have the same experience but we're the exact opposite. I think we should lessen the time that we're together because it's as if like there's no more thrill and excitement. My ex doesn't have any time for me and my current boyfriend always has so both are very much unhealthy. @xeroeight (1060)
• Philippines
17 Jun 10
well that is one reason why relation lead to break up because people just don't get contented on what they have.
If you really love him then you should be happy for what's happening on your relationship now if you fell board on it, it only mean that your not truly in love with the guy.
I really hate to say this but that is my point of view in your discussion.
Here is my suggestion if you really love that guy and want to have some spice on your relationship with him knock him off and drag him somewhere if he ask you why then tell him you love him and want to be happy with him and want to have different quality time together.
Go to a place where you can both enjoy like beaches or carnival or something else the summary of this is DON'T wait for him to take the first move, your the one who want to spice up your relationship then you should be the one to make the first move. If nothing happen try again as long as you love the guy do what ever it takes and try to make him realize that you want some changes in your daily routine.
I know relationship is a continuous self adjustment that is why you are feeling that way.
That guy is sure lucky to have a girlfriend like you.
