being single is not a sign of a freak

to be alone without someone to love is a waste of a body...but to not be alone and have no one to love is a waste of a soul. too many people are cheating and disloyal to their partners. i dont care if people have been together for 50 years, if one of them cheats, that relationship is fake. the closest you can get to someone physically is when the bodies join....that is a sacred union more sacred than anything man can do besides devote themselves to a loving and truthful spiritual god. but such a union is not sacred so much during this generation. people marry to get tax cuts, or because their significant other can make their ambiance easier to reside in, while they sneak out and cheat, having extra marital affairs. i am single because i hope for love. i strive to build up my confidence and composure so that i will never cheat on the female who i will spend the rest of eternity with. in my culture there is a saying..."to even look at a female with lust one automatically commits adultery in their heart"...to love someone is beyond the show of what european style marriages show....it is an eternal union that only a select few will ever share in..who take the time to learn what love really is..so that they may recognize it when it finally comes their way

Hi Goddessjes, You have explained it so beautifully in your post. I too have faced those volley of questions. There is this one friend of mine, he always wanted so desperately to be with women, had relations kind of flirt relations with many. Now he got married a year and a half back. But the marriage didn't last. And surprisingly, he would insist and even make sometimes hurtful remarks of me being single. I know what I am doing in my life, why should anybody interfere, bemuses me. Bodhi

Being single doesn't make anyone a freak. It just means you haven't found that special someone yet.

Hi jes, Your last statement is very remarkable.Yes we'd not get married until we're physically and emotionally ready to have a family.I think you'd ignore what others say because their perspective toward life is different from you.So,forget about what they say. Thanks for raising a very good topic. God bless you.

Being a single is not a freak, as long you are happy in your status. Actually I have a friend who is still single on her late 30's. And she's still happy and contented on her life. So Don't mind what other say to you.

All of these responses are right on. What I was going to say has been said already but a relationship is something that deals with many factors like attraction, compatibility, money, personal beliefs etc. and it seems love is not a big requirement. Friends and family just want to see you get married, have kids, work 9-5 and smile about it never mind if you're happily married. Until I find miss right, I won't say "I do" because I'll only be worse off for it later! Unfortunately life is not a fairy tale and you have to roll with what life throws at you. I guess a lot of people don't realize that and just expect your life to be as THEY perceive it to be. Nothing freaky about single life, asking people to change without considering someone's personal life is!

You're only 28. There is still time. My aunt got married at the age of 33 and had children despite the age. Now, she is very happy with her family. I can remember that her first boyfriend dump her over other girl. They have been in a relationship for 11 years. And we really thought that they gonna end up together.. That guy was his highschool lover. When the guy dumped her, she was 26 that time. She never got into any relationship for 5 years. But eventually he met another guy and got married at the age of 33.. So it's not yet late. When you are ready, and in God's time, you will be with that guy. be blessed!

Well I have been married. I'll have been divorced 4 years in October. A divorced person to a lot of people, is considered damaged goods. To me that is ignorant and stupid thinking. No you're not a freak. You're using your head. Maybe their the freaks Someone told me once that I was selfish not getting remarried because I have kids and they need a father in their lives. Well to me that means that I should wait because I don't want just any random man near my children the way that a lot of other single moms do.

Hello goddessjes I have been married for 4 years and I think being single doesn't mean a freak. Maybe they are just asking some senseless questions, maybe they are just telling you how marriage can change your life or what. Just like if I think a chocolate is tasty to eat, then I would ask you would consider to have a bite. That's it. By the way, I never asked friends or people about why they are single, obviously, the person asking this question is inconsiderate, if they just ask it once, that's fine, if asking more than once, they are very impolite. We should all know, people can choose what kind of life they are living and you can judge what kind of life the best for others.

By being married your friends or classmates have that feeling of assurance that they are lovable. Hmmm...this is the reason why people rush into marriage for the wrong reasons. They do not want people to think that they are not lovable enough to get married. Some people are just not cut for marriage. They are happy the way they are and they do not have insecurities that make them go out of their way to get married no matter what.

Hey there my friend, you're not alone. I'm going through the excat same situation now. All my friends and even people younger than me are tying the knot. All my relatives keep asking when I'm gonna take the plunge. I just h=joke around saying that no one wants to marry me blah blah. Though I make a joke of it, sometimes I do feel bad. I was in a relationship and serious about it but guess the guy wasn't. So I kept my options closed, didn't look elsewhere for a guy. And now he's married and I'm left all alone to find someone for myself!! Yes, it's tough on us but don't let people's comments and opinions get to you. There's no hurry to settle down if you think your not ready so still haven't found Mr. Right. Definitely, married life is not a path of roses, I know from my friends who are married and now wish they didn't get married so early. Though that's not the case always , to be fair. Keep your stand and don't let what people say get to you. When your ready for it - financially, emotionally then go for it. All the best :-)

You're right. Getting married is not that easy especially if you fall for the wrong guy. Also having a baby is big responsibility that can change your life a lot, though having one is a happy feeling, but if you are not yet physically and emotionally ready, you don't have to force youself of having one just to stop you friends from commenting and laughing about your status. As long as you're happy wiht you life right now, and your friends can see that,then you are fine, you don't have to mind them. They will realize soon that they are wrong.

Don't let them make you feel insecure goddessjes. You are making the choices that are right for you in the same way they believe they did by getting married young. I know what it feels like to have all your friends get married and start a family while you are single and not sure if you are ready to do the same although most of us are open to the idea of being married at some point, until you meet the right person, you will remain unsure and that's a good thing. No point in rushing into a marriage that is made for the wrong reasons and then regretting it. Maybe your friends are feeling insecure around you because you seem to be comfortable with independence when they were so willing to leave that behind? Being single is nothing to feel bad about though still many cultures tend to have a fear of independent women especially who are willing to hold out until their heart and their head together tells them it is time to commit to someone. The more emotionally stable and ready that you feel when you do get married / have children, the better chance you have to enjoy the experience and maintain a happy, healthy home life so ignore those barbs and put your frustrations into a new perspective so that you can rise above the comments. Life is for living and enjoying, it is too short to be bound up in the wishful reality of others..

You're right, many girls who left school the same time as me all fell pregnant age between 15-18 and that in my opinion is too young. They haven't had a chance to live their own life yet. Personaly I don't want to settle down until I am about 30-40, maybe some will consider that a little old but I want the next few years to be all about me hehe. I want to find a good career, buy a car, get my own place and stuff. My family tells me a girl of your age should find herself a bf by now. But I am happy single, I can take my time with everything, I don't have to rush about and make an effort with myself 24/7, and just having one seems like too much hassle, you wouldn't get a chance for yourself. I guess the people who tell you this are just jealous because you can come and go as you please and they don't have that freedom any more. Don't feel left out, after all we are the lucky ones;)

Well those people that are use to ask you those kind of questions are not even aware that they are hurting your feelings. Being single parent is not something that you should be ashamed of. Being married and cheated and battered is more humiliating. I feel proud for those woman who are single, just imagine single, all by yourself and your are raising a child. That is not freaky.