i saw my baby's father but he ignore me, what will i do.
By homeshoppers
@homeshoppers (6166)
Philippines
June 26, 2010 6:19pm CST
yesterday i went out with my other friend to buy some baby stuff to complete everything for my up coming baby, im 8 months on the way now so come by 2nd week of july im already on my 9th month expected delivery is 1st week of august. The father of my baby left us when i was 3 months pregnant, i have no idea where did he go like the place, i cant even contact him through phone as at the first it was ringing but on the last months its totally a dead number.
So yesterday my friend saw him, she told me the guy look like my ex so i look at him and yes its him, we tried to follow and called his name many times though not the exaggerated way but looks like he didnt see nor hear anything, i supposed to hate him nor be the one to ignore him for what he did to me but when i saw him i really feel bad for my baby and i almost cry, its not that he ignore me but for the fact the he ignore his baby, what an irresponsible father indeed.
I come to think now that his just around and that world is too small, im just thinking what if someday he will come back am i going to accept him for what he done to me or just totally erased him in my life and go on with my life and my baby.
4 people like this
15 responses
@meemingNEW (2226)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
I'm sorry to hear that.. I guess I can only suggest that you focus more on your self and your baby. Take care of your health so that the baby will be fine too. Don't put too much stress on other unimportant things that will only make you feel sad. Put the baby and your health first on the list.
After delivery, you can always think upon how irresponsible the father of your baby was and the what ifs such as what if he'll come back someday, etc.. In the end, he will get what he deserves because I always believe in karma. What comes around, goes around. I know its painful to see your baby without a father but you can't force a man to be a father.. Like the saying goes "Any male can become a Father but it takes a Real Man to be a Dad". That's just it. Be a good mother/father to your baby. Best of luck!
1 person likes this
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
I don't think he was a man enough in the first place all he wants is to go lusting with her until she gives in and get pregnant. if she didn't get pregnant then there's no doubt she is still by her side.but at least she has a daughter to be inspired now compare to the others. i hope she becomes a great mom some day
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
thanks though i just wish i can be a good mom. but our plan right now is to leave my baby with my parents in the province as i know they can take care of her there and i will be at peace also while trying to have work here and try to work abroad to earn a lot for her good future.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
27 Jun 10
Hi Homeshoppers,
I'm sorry to hear that you are in this spot. I am sure that it hurts a lot that the father of your child has chosen to not take part in being a part of your life or the life of your child's. He, obviously, though has made that choice and for your sake you need to accept it and focus on being strong for your baby. Still, he isn't without responsibility. If you list him as the father on the baby's birth certificate you can go after him for child support. When the baby is born, you should file for physical and legal custody of the child. Along with that you will be able to request child support to be paid thru the state. He will be served up with child support orders. You don't have to contact him or anything....they will do it for you.
@sid556 (30960)
• United States
27 Jun 10
He may come around to that point eventually. You never know. But right now it doesn't appear he is in that spot which is unfortunate for both you and your child. It's unfortunate for him as well because he is missing out on so much.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
yes i know though im just expecting him to be human enough to even tell me that sorry as he cant stand his responsibility and better yet to forget him. after that then perhaps i will be at peace thinking that we settled things better without pain.
1 person likes this
@rosdimy (3926)
• Malaysia
27 Jun 10
Keep yourself budy with something else as an aid to erase him from your mind. Guys like him always have at least one reason for leaving. In reality they are selfish and irresponsible. Most other descriptions are related to these two characteristics.
There is also the possibility of him claiming that the baby is not his, that you had other lovers behind his back. Because of that he wants to look for someone pure and loyal, as if he is a saint.
Surely you do not want to live with someone who may leave whenever he has an excuse to do so? He may come back on his own free will, but not because of love. If he does come back it would probably be due to his failures somewhere else. He will use the baby to break your emotional and mental defences.
Yo udeserve a better life.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
i dont think he will think the baby is not from him even though i had bf but my bf was based in UK and his been there for many years now and he knows it. yes i guess due to his failure as he used to have failures from his previous relationship due to being irresponsible though someday it will hit back to him, everything so he will also feel the pain.
@abj163 (1037)
• India
27 Jun 10
i think he is avoiding you just because of that baby.....things wont be cleared unless he will talk to you....i think you should erase him from your life and just go on in your life with your baby.....this world is so big and i am sure you will get a true love in this big world ....just go on in your life and see one day you will be happy for leaving him....there are a lot of reasons to cry in everyone's life but maximum people are overcoming their mistakes and going with the real life....so i think you should also do the same....everything in life doesn't happens as like we want so we have to sacrifice there we have to adjust us with that and i hope you will also do the same...god bless u
happy mylotting
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
i would definitely accept, understand and willing to let go of him if he could tell me whats going on than be gone just like that leaving me thinking about things.
@jnah_orakel87 (146)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
yah small world
may i ask how old are you?
what an a----le!!!! he could at least talk to you,,god how can a man be like that!!.FYI he doesn't deserve you,i believe in karma!!!
dont feel bad coz it might affect on your baby,,for me just forget about him go on with your life,,thank god coz you have a new life and new reason to go on,,by the way congrats,,girl you deserve someone better someone worth it
@zel2zel (134)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
I think there is something wrong with that man. There are reasons for everything, we should not just judge people like that, he haven't said anything to anyone. But I feel sorry for your baby. Whatever reasons that man has, he should not involve your baby. I hope that man can fix his problems and face you and your baby.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
actually i remember before that he used to tell me his problem, like his father have terminal cancer and etc. so perhaps he has lots of problem but i just wonder why he didnt talk to me for atleast to share me what happened so i will know.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
actually i remember before that he used to tell me his problem, like his father have terminal cancer and etc. so perhaps he has lots of problem but i just wonder why he didnt talk to me for atleast to share me what happened so i will know.
@eurekafemme (5877)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
Hey, Homeshoppers, cheer up.:-)
I can feel your pain. I am a woman and also a mother. This guy not only hurt you but hurt your baby as well.I don't know what he was thinking but he is a total jerk.Totally irresponsible.
You tried your best and get enough courage to face him despite of the pain he inflicted on you for your baby's sake. That, is admirable...But, sadly, again, he proved that he is not worth it...
whether to accept him or not? Just cross the bridge when you get there. Because as far as this guy is concern, it seems that it will not happen soon.
What you need to do is focus on your baby and the delivery. you need all the energy you can get to have a safe delivery. Don't let this a-----e gets the best in you.
Always be well. God bless you.:-)
@rene12 (794)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
I suggest that you just live with your baby and forget about him forever like my mom did. She raised me to her extent and succeeded in bringing me up. Now my "DAD" came and mixed things up but my mom still insists that we don't need him. Guys like that will not have a happy family because they always run from their responsibility. If not, they feel that they are so important that we need him but it is the opposite of reality.
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
yes i was also thinking that maybe things will not hit him now but someday it will specially when his old already yet alone in the dark coz no one with him nor someone he love the most will also left him leaving him alone yet old and sick. i guess someday i will do the same too, to make him realize that he left something very precious and he just throw it away.
@clouds0327 (1389)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
He is not worth it. Guys like that won't make a good father and a good husband either so don't feel bad. Instead you should feel lucky that you are not connected to that guy anymore. Imagine what type of husband he will be or father with that attitude. Feel blessed that you have a baby coming and that angel will surely love you unconditionally, they are God's gift to us. And they are not like those guys that vanishes when they get their gf pregnant. They are going to love you no matter how you look, you smell, you talk etc.. Take care of your baby and help them grow into a person different from his/her father.. 
@homeshoppers (6166)
• Philippines
27 Jun 10
thank you, actually when he left me it was not really clear coz he didnt say a words to me, its like he was just gone, i was even worried if theres something wrong happened to him like accident or something as i cant find him and also for the fact that i already change my number, so yesterday when i saw him i was thinking that maybe there will be a change but looks like he really intentionally want to go. but why he didnt say any words like goodbye and etc.
@bystander (2292)
• Philippines
12 Jul 10
for starters, kick his butt for being irresponsible... then you can throw hot coffee on his face, for enjoying his relationship with you but running away from the outcome, which is no small responsibility... then, you can stick a banana cue stick on his eyes for failing to see what all he did to you... and to an innocent child who did not ask to be born...
@Professor2010 (20162)
• India
12 Jul 10
So sad to hear this story of yours, this man is certainly is a cheat, he is playing with your sentiments, take help of some friends who know both of you, but if he still ignores you can go for legal action..
Thanks for sharing.
Welcome always.
Cheers.
Professor
Cheers.
Professor
@xasasa (321)
• United States
27 Jun 10
I'm so sorry! I know that you want the best for your baby. You can't make your baby's father to be a father. As hard it may be right now just focus on your baby. The father may come around an be a father but you cannot force that. Your baby deserves a Daddy who wants to be there 100%. I say think about your baby's welfare 100% if the father comes back make the decision about what is best for that baby.
@yspmyl (3435)
• Malaysia
27 Jun 10
I am sorry to hear that. I think he is totally try to ignore you and he doesn't want to bear the responsibility as a father. He is selfish and totally irresponsible person. It is better to forget him and look for someone else that is much better than him. I know it is difficult but this will be better for you and your baby future.
@iwrite (5034)
• Singapore
27 Jun 10
homeshoppers
Forget the heartless creature! I think it is so sad, I doubt he is a man. To man a man has to own his responsibility. Doesn't he know he has your baby, and to leave you like that is just not being responsible. I think they are the lowest form of creature.
I wish that you and you baby well, I hope you baby would grow up strong and healthy. I hope you would be happy and get a nice and responsible man, and you great dad for your baby.
