Betrayed! hurt!

India
June 29, 2010 12:31pm CST
I am very much hurt by a very close friend. We were together in college. A gang of Three. Three idiots! . Me, A and J. A is already engaged. J and myself were single and ready to mingle. After finishing college, A and J got job in one MNC , while i got in another one. We were so close, friends that we would trust each other with our life. Now, after 2 years of job. Me and A came to know from a third party that J is getting engaged and its a girl from our old class/collage . We were shocked. He was in love and he never told us anything. 4 years of college + 2 years of work. He never shared it, nor a hint. Now even after the case has reached the engagement stage, he did not even show the courtesy of calling us and informing us. Even now he speaks over phone with us, but never mentioned this. I feel very hurt, A , too..
4 responses
@jhudy101 (373)
• Philippines
30 Jun 10
In this situation, feeling hurt is just a normal feeling to feel as it truly hurt when u always remember a friend but that certain friend fails to remember you the same way that you do. But the feeling of betrayal is far off for me to feel as betrayal is much more serious than that. There might be a reason why he chooses not to tell you the latest update that he now has including his engagement. Its his own choice.and you cant change his choice. what is best to do is to try to understand why he chose not to tell you. Or maybe if possible, try to talk to him personally and congratulate him, that way he would be aware that you already know. or maybe brought up the topic to him in a nice and polite way and so to settle the issue. A good talk always or most of the time settles issues we have so its better to talk it out.
1 person likes this
@amrddy (215)
• Philippines
1 Jul 10
Well that's why there's a saying "You can choose your friend but not your family"...Sometimes even if you have been friends for say 30 years or more, there will come a time that this friend may hurt you and call you names for no apparent reasons. Yes you will get hurt but in the long run you will just say to yourself, "it's not me who lost a friend or friends" for that matter. When the time comes that she or he is able to realize her/his mistake, maybe its too late...
• Philippines
29 Jun 10
i will get hurt. but will understand. he definitely has reasons for being silent about his engagement and i will respect his decision.
@jlydsnr (122)
• United States
30 Jun 10
It would hurt my feelings as well but I would want to speak with him about it so I could understand more. Maybe he thinks you two will give him a hard time about it? I say just ask him about it. You have that right as his best friend...and also let him know how it makes you feel and made you feel to hear it from someone else. On another note...when I got married 3 years ago, I didn't tell my best friend until after the wedding. We had a small wedding with just family no friends. We talked through it and are still the best of friends.