I just finally accepted it...

yes.....I too got disappointed with my fairy tale. I stopped expecting anything from him nowadays.

Communication is key in all relationships. Does he know what you want??? Do you expect him to already know or read your mind? I'm afraid few things worth while in life come easy. Greatness sometimes takes work. Never forget that when he does good, leave no doubt in his mind that he did good. He'll be eager to do more.

No just in marriage, but life in general... I've always wondered how I get so upset if something doesn't go my way. I would be so affected by it that I couldn't function a hundred percent on other tasks. Although not fully, I am beginning to realize that maybe the fault is not with others. Maybe I should be expecting and accepting life as it is. Congratulations on your acceptance! You're way ahead of me. I hope to be there someday.

Haha, maybe I have a lot before, but after a while of just looking at others, I gave up on the idea. Before I always hoped for a forever lovey dovey life, but looking how some ended up in divorces and whatnot I shouldn't hope for so much, but be happy with what I have now. Rather than expecting the most romantic perfect love life, just be content with what you have. xD

hi. Fairy tales? unfortunatly they dont exist, i learnt that the hard way, i gave up everything i had for the woman i loved, moved away from everything id always known, and got screwed for it, iv learned not to have expectations about anything.

I see your point and i understand your "acceptance" but i think there is more to it. Taking myself for example, i never had that fairy tale life as a kid. My parents struggled from day to day trying to get by. They never had that "fairy tale" life, but i was never sure if it was because they didn't have time or because they couldn't afford it. As time went by i began to hate their life style and i blamed them for it. At one point or another they made it. They went from being dirt poor to owning a home and having jobs and careers. But they didn't do or follow the story line of that fairy tale. But they were happy, and so was i along with all my siblings. However, just as fast as it came it went away. My dad got caught doing things he shouldn't have. Went to prison for a while and everyday after that one it was a downhill ride, with things getting worse and worse. I gave up on them, all i try to think about is my school, friends, and my education. After all, the only thing i want more than anything is to have that fairy "tale life". Weather i find it a disappointment in the end or not, its a risk Im willing to take. But i cant tell myself its not there or that it doesn't exist because that's what i use as my motivation and inspiration. It seems like your the only one in your marriage making the attempt to get that "fairy tale" life. But finding the right partner to do the other half of the work is important too. I understand if your you your story might be over, but you have your kids and that doesn't mean you cant give them that fairy tale life. I never woke up to see my mom have breakfast ready for me or my siblings. In my life two stories failed. My parents didn't have theirs and neither did I. But that doesn't mean you cant give that tale to your children. Or those important people that surround you.

Hi Lilangelspreschool, We grow up as girls being read faiytales and then I guess when we meet someone we expect it all to be heartsand flowers but the reality is that istis just not like that, remember most fairytales end at the wedding they never show you the reality of living with each other and nasty step mum-in-laws too etc so godd for you to have finally accepted as when wehave expectations we are always let down eh! Huggles. Ellie :D

Lol oh yea I lived that fantasy, his love was like magic it solved every problem, he opened the doors, never talked back, bought me flowers and gift, rubbed my feet............hahaha and then I woke up!!! Anyhow I been in a relationship for 10 years, just loving him is as close to a fairy tale as I will every go. But not one of those princess ewwwy gooey ones, a fairy tale with dragons, swords, fire and gore. I just hope it has a happy ending. The best marriages are the ones when you can accept everything wont be perfect but love the few things that are close.

When I was still single, I dreamt of meeting my prince charming and then we will live happily ever after. Just like you, I wanted my marriage life as something like fairy tale, where my husband will always be romantic like singing me a song while giving flowers, dating, giving me breakfast in bed..But when I got married, it seems that I have woke up from that big dream. My husband is not really sweet, he doesn't really express what he really feels. I even tried to beg him to do those things that will make me happy, he would try, but he will just return to his old ways. But still I persisted to ask him to do those romatic stuffs. He was able to do some little changes but not my expectations, or my "dream". I guess with marriage, there is no such thing as fairy tale, as if eveything is happy and sweet. With marriage, you will experience all the trials and hardships, especially emotionally, because of your many differences. But as time goes by, I got used to it and was able to accept that he is already like that and I can never change him. But as long as I can feel he loves me, however he shows it or not, then I don't have to expect for more. I just learned that in marriage, we don't have to look for fairy tale story, and we just have to set realistic expectations so that we will not be disappointed.

I've never expected a prince charming or a romantic guy for my partner. He can be as ugly as a toad (pardon my language) as long as he loves me and he would be there when I need him. He does not need to call me darling and he does not need to have a clever conversation. As long as he does whenever he said he'll do it, for me that is more important.

You are right: Life sure isn't a fairy tale, but it does have its moments. My husband and I have been married for 25 years, and when we were dating, life did have more romance, dates, movies, dinners, etc. But when you actually live together in a marriage, it takes more effort, because both of us are making a living and raising kids. Sometimes, life is anything but romantic, but when you really love someone and are committed, you will be willing to work things out, talk about things, and love each other "through" all these bad times that are hard, but are a part of life. I don't think anyone who is married has a perfectly romantic, spontaneous, love life. I know for myself, if we are having an argument or fight, it's good to step back for awhile, gather your feelings, pray, and ask for forgiveness. Sometimes it takes awhile, but I know having a good marriage is about really loving that other person, (realizing your own faults, too), and being willing to work through the hard stuff. It's easy when you're young and dating, but not so easy when you live day after day with that person. Nothing that's really worth it is necessarily going to come that easy. We try to grab those opportunities that we do have (like going on an all-expense paid trip to Hawaii last year) and enjoy the moment thoroughly and be thankful for those times.

I never expected too much of life in general. Life is real, life is pain. Of course it has good moments, but thats all they are: moments, nothing else. I'm not trying to bring anyone down, I just face the truth.

I always hoped for a fairy tale love, but it didn't happen, and I doubt it would ever happen, I think by nature we won't have fairy tales, I am the type of romantic, but it's very hard, almost impossible to find that perfect match, with which you can share your love for so long, that you don't get lost on the road and get sick of the relationship.

I see your point and i understand your "acceptance" but i think there is more to it. Taking myself for example, i never had that fairy tale life as a kid. My parents struggled from day to day trying to get by. They never had that "fairy tale" life, but i was never sure if it was because they didn't have time or because they couldn't afford it. As time went by i began to hate their life style and i blamed them for it. At one point or another they made it. They went from being dirt poor to owning a home and having jobs and careers. But they didn't do or follow the story line of that fairy tale. But they were happy, and so was i along with all my siblings. However, just as fast as it came it went away. My dad got caught doing things he shouldn't have. Went to prison for a while and everyday after that one it was a downhill ride, with things getting worse and worse. I gave up on them, all i try to think about is my school, friends, and my education. After all, the only thing i want more than anything is to have that fairy "tale life". Weather i find it a disappointment in the end or not, its a risk Im willing to take. But i cant tell myself its not there or that it doesn't exist because that's what i use as my motivation and inspiration. It seems like your the only one in your marriage making the attempt to get that "fairy tale" life. But finding the right partner to do the other half of the work is important too. I understand if your you your story might be over, but you have your kids and that doesn't mean you cant give them that fairy tale life. I never woke up to see my mom have breakfast ready for me or my siblings. In my life two stories failed. My parents didn't have theirs and neither did I. But that doesn't mean you cant give that tale to your children. Or those important people that surround you.