L E N D I N G money leads to - L O S S - of Friendship/Relationship....

Lending money doesn't necessarily lead to such a loss. It depends on the situation as always. If you think you can trust that person, you can always lend them anything of any amount. You would understand their situation as well and with everything well thought through, you would then decide if you would help out that person or not at all. Sometimes, we are not fortunate enough to lend money to those that we thought we can depend on but, that's just how things go. We learn from that and by the time another similar event would happen, we would take precautions so that we can avoid the mistakes that we were unlucky enough to experience before.

well, i did lend money one time to a friend. it was over a year ago already and she still hasn't paid me back. when she borrowed it, she said she was gonna pay me back within a month. i remember it was a couple of weeks before my birthday. i invited her for my party, but she wasn't replying. so i asked her what the problem was. she said she was embarrassed to go to my party since she still couldn't pay me back by then. i sincerely told her that i'm want her to go to my party but not because so that she could pay me back. sadly, during the night of my party, there was a huge storm. so she didn't make it along with a couple of other friends. after that, we communicated a couple of times on facebook. i never brought the money up, but she would always apologize to me about it. i'm not the type of person to claim money, even if it was a loan from me. i just can't bring myself to ask for money from my friends even if it was actually my money. we haven't talked in a while now. i don't know if it's a complete loss of friendship. but personally, i would rather lose money than friendship.

While it's true that there are some cases of people not being paid by people whom they lent money to, there are however others who return them on time. As for me, I only lend money to my closest friends- people whom I really trust. Meanwhile, if a family member wants to borrow money from me, I don't expect them to pay. Usually in our family they would just use the word borrow but the underlying message is "ask". There are at times wherein my siblings would borrow and return them at their own time. In cases like this I'm really thankful if the money is returned to me.

Hi busybee Oh this is a tricky question. On one hand you want to help out but then you are afraid where it might lead to. I have in the past loaned out money to family and friends and never got it returned. I have since learned that if someone calls me for money I will take a look at the amount they want and whether or not I will need that money back real soon. I also then will make sure it goes to where they say it needs to go to. I am very cautious about lending money out to anyone.

I will not say that lending money to any friend or relative is wrong, but the person at the receiving end should realise his duty to repay it back promptly, and should not make it a habit of asking for money time and again. Sometimes, though he pays promptly, we develop some sort of ill feelings when we see him even if he visits us casually and not for monetary help.

I think the ones who borrow without returning are not worth our friendship/relationship. It's basic morality to return what you borrowed. So don't care, he/she is not your friend/relative, only a immoral stranger.

You could never be more True here. People who lend money to others, especially friends unless it is a small amount should often just Write it off, and hope for the Best from there. Loaning money is a hard thing to expect to ever be returned. Unless you have a legal binding contract you never know who to Trust as well. So personally I think you should use caution when loaning out some money unless you're handing it out never caring if you ever see it again as well.

Hello busybee10, It's one bitter reality of life. As an old adage says, "Money is the root of all evils." Even at times that although we also have our own financial needs to satisfy, our true concern and most sincere intentions of helping out our friend and/or relative prevails. Decision-making becomes a battle between what is URGENT vs. what is IMPORTANT. It has happened to me not just a few times being the so soft-hearted me. For example, I have a utility bill to pay due in 2 weeks' time. I know it is important that I settle that account as soon as possible. But here comes an aunt crying as she badly needs money because her child needs to pay for her tuition fee in school so as to be able to take the final exam. It is urgent that she pays today as the exam is also today. My tendency on such cases would be to lend what I have expecting to have it back, say, in a week's time as promised so I still have enough time to settle my own financial dues. Quite disappointing, those expectations don't happen some times. There may come strings of excuses even to the extent of my aunt and my cousin avoiding me. At such instances, I only tell myself that it's up to them to make their world smaller. Anyway, it's them who will suffer the consequences because there won't be a next time as far as I'm concerned. Hahaha Well, that's me -- so soft-hearted and yet can be so stubborn when abused. Yes, sometimes, we really have to be extra cautious when lending out money to our relatives and friends... money lost may also mean friendship/relationship lost eventually.

Lending money changes the dynamic of the relationship. Instead of being equal friends, you are not a lender and a borrower. Even the most open and connected friends, in the back of their mind will have the "he owes me money" and "I owe him money". There's actually a old joke that goes "if you loan your brother-in-law $10, and you never see him again, was it worth it?" The point being that no one wants to hang out with their lender. Another problem is that typically the reason people need to borrow money, is because they were irresponsible to begin with. The chances that an irresponsible person will suddenly become responsible when they borrow money from is, is almost zero. In fact, sometimes the best thing you can do, is let them suffer so they learn to be wise with money later.

I have noticed that whenever you lend money to someone he does not want to return it. He or she might return initially to gain your trust. Once you give them a larger amount they do not want to part with it. All this has taught me a lesson. Do lend the money if you have to, but also include safe guard to ensure that you get your money back. Make an agreement and make him sign it. Make him sign post dated cheques. If the person has no intention to return your money he would not take it. If he enters into an agreement you would be able to create enough trouble to make him repent for the rest of his life.

in this world ,human weekness is to spend ,a few people returns money and keep promises,i had bad exp about money ,hence i avoid giving money

i think we must lend money if we feel the person really need it and if the person is sweet to us and close to us. me for example i gave money to a girl i almost didnt know and i trusted her and later on she stole money from me for the first time i refused to lend her bcs i already lended her many times and i was giving my mum's money while i couldnt receive my own money in my job. when i received money from my job sure i gave back to my mummy, i warned my mum that i lended her and my mum didnt mind sure even she was a bit worried but that girl took advantage of my good intentions to lend her money :( but i think that if someone asked me i would give it bcs we never know if the person is good or not right? so we cant just punish one person for the mistake of another one^^

It's better to lend money from someone not that close to you than lending it to a close friend or a relative. Money can make one forget bloodbonds :)

no one shud help their frns in time of their need but you shud also investigate the cause for which ur frn is in need of money like if one says come on give me 100 bucks to njoy a movie ..now this is really a bad reason..but if u see some one is in need of a book u shud give him money ..it was just an example it all depends upon the nature of whom u r givin money...

Money can make relationship breaks as the saying goes. Money can be a reason for relationship break ups. Even blood relatives fight because of money matters. With regard to your topic. I was in the same situation where my friendship lead to breaking because of money. I was very much generous with a certain friend whom I even considered and treated as my sister I lend her money for many times, but she had been backbiting me and telling things to people against me. She is making gossips about me which are of course no truth to it. It came to a point also that her debt has accumulated and never pay me back not even a single cent. I no longer trust her not because she did not pay me back, I am more concern with the trust I gave him and the friendship, however she broke it because she is telling lies against me.

Money can make relationships break as a saying goes. I believe that. Even blood relationship breaks when it comes to money matters. With regard to your issue of lending money may lead to lose of friendship? That is so true. I was in that situation before. I was too generous with a friend in lending her money for many times, only to find out that she is backbiting me and telling other people against me. I have trusted her so much that I even considered her my sister, but my trust to her was broken because of those gossips she is telling to other people. The gossips were not true though. She also did not return the money I have lent her. Right now, I have no communication with her.

Hi I just learned a lesson the hard way. I read some book telling that if you want to keep good friends, then don't let them borrow money. It might ruin the friendship. Of course, It would be hard for us to see them suffering but truth to be told, they don't learn or bother to pay. So keep your friendship, keep your money. It's not just the finances but the trust and hurting feeling afterwards that really matter. Good Day!

If you can give some money you should give a, not all 100% money that's required but even 5% will be enough. And the other thing is all depends on the person to whom you are lending money if he is honest he will definitely return your money . I have seen some persons who had returned their loan quite honestly.

Money should never be brought in between friendship. Yes but like you said I feel quite bad when people cheat me but still I do not get the guts to ask them for my money back. I am quite softhearted and sometimes wish they gave more importance to friendship just like me. ALAS

Actually if one of your friend is in a financial crisis needing money... you must not lend him money at first.. you can giude him to get out of the trouble .. even then if he is not able to come out of the crisis, you could lend him a small amount of money with which he could get some hope of coming out of his problem. this is the only right way for me !!