Behaviors we can avoid in a relationship
By Adrian74
@Adrian74 (10)
Romania
July 10, 2010 10:30am CST
Here are some factors that may breakdown a relationship:
1. Criticism: any dissatisfaction with the partner that begin with: "You..." may be percieved as a criticism or a blame. For example: "You are always late!" can leads to a defensive behavior in our partner and he/she may feel threatened. Try to replace those kind of sentences (for example: "You did something...!" or "You always....!") with "I feel..." or "I think..." and other first-person sentences when we express a complaint. Although the logical meaning of the sentence is not changed,a new message like "I would be glad if you won’t be late" radically changes its psychological significance:the other no longer feels accused or threatenedand therefore there would be no risk to rise a new conflict.
2. Lack of respect: when he/she insults the partner.
3. Lack of openness, lying the partner.
4. Emotional withdrawal is another major factor which leads to the breakup of a relationship.
5. Ignoring the partner's problems.
Accepting the advice, suggestions and recommendations of the partner is helps in maintaining a long term relationship.
To have a healthy and long term relationship, check first if any of the behaviors listed above are present and try to eliminate them quickly.
2 people like this
8 responses
@babymc23 (153)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
Hi!
yeah, i agree. These can be detrimental to any relationship. Although too much openness and honesty can also be the problem. My boyfriend was my bestfriend first before we got together and it is quite difficult to hide something from him since he knows me too much. Even my little quirks like facial expressions, even if i try to hide it, he knows what it means. At time it can be quite frustrating.
@sweetloveforeve (13120)
• Portugal
11 Jul 10
no i think thats cute^^ that means he really cares for you and knows you better than anyone else i think thats the sweetest thing^^ you are so lucky to have a bf like that^^ i know maybe you dont want him to know when you are sad to dont worry him but im sure he be glad to help you and comfort you and show you how much he loves you^^ i wish when i have a bf he be like yours^^
@edwardjoy2000 (2387)
• United Arab Emirates
10 Jul 10
good reasearch Adrian...i agree with you...we always need to be supportive to each other...People forget the oat that they take during the wedding that they will be togahter in happiness and in pain, in loss and in gain to cheer and live forever. The problems start when their ego's clash. I have been married to sometime now...i have understood the problems and i have found the solution also. Every one thinks marraiage is hadling responsibilities and they look for a perfect person...when they know no one is perfect. marriage is building the bridge on the differences which people fail to understand.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
Nothing seems to be Perfect in a relationship but for the sake of LOVE people tend to compromise so that the relationship will prosper and become stronger than before. not just building bridges but also building a bubble between the two people.
@knicnax (2233)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
I agree with you. this is really a nice post. Respect is one of the most important aspects of a relationship. Thanks for your suggestion here :)
@sweetloveforeve (13120)
• Portugal
11 Jul 10
thats right everything you said^^ we must not accuse the person always and try to understand him^^ also we must take care always of the person's feelings^^ and care if they have a problem so they can feel they can share with us^^ also we must not lie or pretend things are fine if something is wrong just to avoid an arguement. it is better to say things even if it will become an arguement than dont say. anyway thanks for share with us these advices^^ it sure helps in people relationships ^^
@pirate451 (152)
• India
27 Jul 10
Yes,it is sure behaviors can avoid in their relationship because if they show bad behaviors in front your special one then hope you will lost someone whom do you love or care and not only by him/her but your parent and friend will be also neglected you from their company or house.If we don't have behavior then who will wanted you is no one but their is someone wanted you who is same like you only.If you love your someone then have show good altitude and behavior with him/her
@kquiming (2997)
• Philippines
10 Jul 10
couldn't agree with you more. i have a shelf full of relationship / psychology books and they basically have the same point over most issues with minor differences, but there are always exceptions and exemptions in the end. while some authors disagree about certain issues / conclusions, i have analyzed them all and have made my own version of what i've learned so far. anyway these are not exactly rules, but more like guidelines...but the main key is honesty in communication coupled with good intentions.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
11 Jul 10
Hello adrian,
Well, that's part of the relationship, it's still the getting to know each other process. that's why courtship is important because both parties get to know each other through giving out information on needs and wants. and how to please the woman and the woman would determine how sincere the man is. i think such behaviors cannot be avoid how ever, it's part of the relationship that both should make the effort to compromise and try to changed things for the betterment of that relationship, otherwise, break up isn't too far away.
