Pressing past the pain of feelings
By Jotomy
@Jotomy (6322)
India
July 12, 2010 11:53pm CST
Emotional feelings which gives us pain is often more devastating than physical pain. A physical pain can be cured with a pill but emotional pain is not so easy to deal with. Most of the people i observed that they talk about their physical pain saying that, i have leg pain today or neck pain or back pain or headache but they feel uncomfortable talking about their inner emotional pain. I feel emotional pain also should be revealed to some one to release that pain. Our emotions are part of our makeup, and they can wear out or become sick like any other part of the anatomy.... What is your opinion on this? Share with me....
2 people like this
19 responses
@jaiho2009 (39141)
• Philippines
13 Jul 10
Precisely,emotional pain doesn't have any medical prescription or clinic for check ups.
But,we can share or express it to our beloved ones ,trusted friends and even ourselves.
The hardest part is when,the person itself doesn't know how to accept that emotional pain,blaming themselves for what they're suffering.
It could lead into depression and even anxiety.
I have seen people who keep blaming themselves for their situation,instead of looking for any solution.
They keep asking why,and where did they gone wrong,and that makes them hurt themselves even more.
Sharing and expressing it can help us ease some pain,and even give us a lighter feeling inside.
Crying also can be good help,crying out loud under shower,or in the rain.
And,the best thing to do is,slowly accepting the reality and let bygone be bygone.
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi jaiho, yes dear i too observed the people who blame themselves. Yes people have to find out the solution rather blaming themselves or others. well said that people will go on and on accepting the reality. Really very depth is there in your words. Thanks for your response. Have a good day.
@jerikjames (1041)
• Philippines
13 Jul 10
You're right. I absolutely agree with you. Emotional pain does more damage than physical pain as it affects you holistically. I mean, when you have a bruise or a wound, the particular area which has them only feels the pain there. While if you are dealing with emotional injury, every part of your body feels the pain. It affects your mood, your appetite, and it also drains you intellectually.
It is sad but true that physical injuries could easily be healed. But the trauma which is already emotional injury could take years, or even forever to heal. In addition, when healed, physical injuries leave a scar. It has a scar but it doesn't hurt anymore. Whereas emotional injuries leave a scar which will hurt forever.
2 people like this
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi jerikjames, yeah, physical injuries could easily be healed, if you apply some cream or having pill but emotional injuries never be healed unless we leave it or forget it. But i feel thinking in a positive way, "as its their nature to treat people, so we are no concerned with that" so you can move further happily. Thanks for your response. Have a good day.
@Hatley (163776)
• Garden Grove, California
13 Jul 10
jotomy ohyes emotional pain is the worst as no pill will cure it but
sometimes just grabbing your mate and telling him or her what you are
suffering does more good than any thing else.You need someone who is
on your side and will just be there and listen and lend a shoulder
to weep on if necessary.Sometimes just being held in his arms can soothe
me and make my emotional hurt dissolve quickly. but now I am a widow so any emotional pain i will have to solve for myself.
1 person likes this
@vandana7 (100297)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hatley dear, we are there, and while having us may not feel as good as having your husband around, still we do understand what you feel even if we are so far away and wish there was something we could do about it. Please understand you are never alone!
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
@ vandana and kalav...
so nice of you both...
@ Hatley, yes Hatley we feel that we need someone to share our feelings, since you are there with your other friends (you said that you are staying in an retirement house) you may be having good friends there, you can share with them too or we all are there to hear to you, so that you can be free from your such pains if at all you have. Don't worry, worry makes you down again. Be happy that your son got job now. I pray god that you will join your son soon. You are never alone, you can share anything with us. Here in Hyderabad we have an Home for the aged and one of my friends started one home, i go there some times to distribute fruits and biscuits. There each and every one will have a pathetic story, you will get pain to hear it, children are leaving their parents in the paid houses and living separately, some people's children are in abroad, some people have a different story that their daughter in laws are not caring them, clashes in the family, caring parents has become a big problem and burden to children, and some of them are feeling that they should not be burden to their children so they are staying away. Everyone has some problems, but i feel this old age has become somewhat curse to the people. Whenever i visit there they feel so much happy and they take my hand and make me to sit there and they show so much love that you will not feel to leave them at all, i wonder how come people are missing such a wonderful people. Really children are missing their parents affection and love. One has to realize what love is. Hope everyone should have a good days ahead. Have a wonderful day dear.
so nice of you both...
@ Hatley, yes Hatley we feel that we need someone to share our feelings, since you are there with your other friends (you said that you are staying in an retirement house) you may be having good friends there, you can share with them too or we all are there to hear to you, so that you can be free from your such pains if at all you have. Don't worry, worry makes you down again. Be happy that your son got job now. I pray god that you will join your son soon. You are never alone, you can share anything with us. Here in Hyderabad we have an Home for the aged and one of my friends started one home, i go there some times to distribute fruits and biscuits. There each and every one will have a pathetic story, you will get pain to hear it, children are leaving their parents in the paid houses and living separately, some people's children are in abroad, some people have a different story that their daughter in laws are not caring them, clashes in the family, caring parents has become a big problem and burden to children, and some of them are feeling that they should not be burden to their children so they are staying away. Everyone has some problems, but i feel this old age has become somewhat curse to the people. Whenever i visit there they feel so much happy and they take my hand and make me to sit there and they show so much love that you will not feel to leave them at all, i wonder how come people are missing such a wonderful people. Really children are missing their parents affection and love. One has to realize what love is. Hope everyone should have a good days ahead. Have a wonderful day dear. 
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi saphrina, yes most of the people don't want to come out with their emotional pain. Do you know, 95% of the humorous people are having much pain in their heart but they cover all those and they will be smiling and make others also smile and laugh to forget their pain because they don't want to give pain to others by telling their pain. Those people will have a tough life but they move on and on without showing any inner feelings to anyone. Thanks for your response. Have a good day.
@annabel_nov (85)
• Philippines
13 Jul 10
it's true that emotional feelings or emotional pain took so long to heal. Physical pain can be healed through medicines but emotional pain will take a long time before you can even say that you have overcome the pain. It's like a toothache that prolonging your agony every time you feel the pain. Even if you release it to your trusted person, as long as you cannot get over it, it will never leaves you. The best thing to do is to ask God for help that you may be able to forgive the person who have cause you emotional pain and that you may be able to overcome the situation you are in.
@ynowiziki (79)
• China
13 Jul 10
I totally agree with you...In china we have a saying-'whoever start a trouble should end up it'.I think this is kind of explaining how to slove the emotion problem.And indeed most of people don't want to share the inner emotional to others,even the closest friend..
@kalav56 (11464)
• India
13 Jul 10
A very nice way of putting it Jotomy.WHat you say is absolutely true.WHen there is a physical injury it is given soothing creams and it heals with time.But whatever the injury is the inherent antibodies in the system must aid fast recovery.When the emotional injury is deep it cuts deep too.The mind keeps dwelling upon it and it gets worse with intense brooding.It occasionally needs an emotional outlet ; it is like a wound being cleeansed and the bad blood and pus removed allowing faster healing. Otherwise it keeps festering and the wound eats into the emotional system causing depression.Here also emotional antibodies are needed to be very strong to protect the mind from depression and allowing healing.
@Buchi_bulla (8298)
• India
13 Jul 10
Physical pain you can reveal to anyone but not emotional feelings and pains. Now-a-days all are busy and no one is willing to share our sorrows, fears, apprehensions and feelings. They say we are spreading negativity. Even if they listen to it, they will not take it in the right spirit. They will comment on it at the back. So sharing physical pain is easier than sharing emotional pains. But a person is lucky if he gets a proper shoulder, whether parents, spouse or true friend, to shell the burden on, even for a while. That will be a great relief to that person.
1 person likes this
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi friend, it is true we can get relief from the physical pain by using balms or creams or oil massage but it is tough to get relief from the emotional pain. And it will effect to your health also. Yes, they are the luckiest people who gets a proper person. Then we can relax and be away from that pain for a while atleast, i know that can be there for a long time, if god helps us we will forget that pain, and the time passes may be years later we may forget that pain. Thanks for your nice response. Have a good day.
@keep_onwatch (2680)
• India
13 Jul 10
Yeah you are right, physical pain can be cured by a pill, but emotional pain is more a threat as it doesn't always have a pill or a pain killer. Sharing our problems with others might sure make the burden light, but the pain wouldn't go away. Trust worthy frendz sure give us support and confidence and stick with us through the problem.
1 person likes this
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi keep_onwatch, it is true that some emotional pains wouldn't go away even we share with others, because those are linked with our life. Some pains we can't express to others and it will become an headache. Those problems we have to leave it god and ask for his help, hope our god will guide us. yes you are right trust worthy friends can give us support and confidence. Thanks for your response. Have a good day.
@veejay19 (3589)
• India
13 Jul 10
You are right jotomy, physical pain can be cured but emotional pain is something that stays with you for ever.It may disappear and reduce with time but will never go away and can resurface suddenly.The only way to overcome it is to turn towards God because it is only he who can heal us of our sorrows.Repetition of his divine name with utter devotion and fervour and deep meditation can remove the emotional afflictions and sorrows from our kives forever and heal us completely.
@rorisricha (732)
• India
13 Jul 10
Yeah, I too agree with this.....emotional pain is the pain which we can't cured by anything. It is inner pain. Until one is in that particular situation they can't understand it. Even if we share it's just sharing that's it the pain remains.......I do accept with you.
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi rorisricha, it is true that our emotional pain can't be cured by anything. If we share it with some one i think it will help you a little. If some one hurt you or degraded you, such things will last for so many days, it is very difficult to over come. Thanks for your response. Have a good day.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
13 Jul 10
the worst part is emotional pain, maybe it's alright not to forget the past, but you should forget the pain of that past since it would make you sick. for physical pain i believe you can forget, as for my tooth problem for days i was able to hold it off and after taking the pain relievers, it's just a bit relief.
1 person likes this
@johnpillai (2082)
• Germany
13 Jul 10
You are absolutely correct. In the text book of my 7 year old son, there is a lesson about emotional feelings. Children are being taught to identify their own feelings and express them in a polite manner. This is a matter of training. The training should start in pre school age.
1 person likes this
@Jotomy (6322)
• India
13 Jul 10
Hi johnpillai, ho it is nice hear that children has the lesson about this. yes pre school is the one for good foundation for the children. By this i think they will learn how to come out with such emotional pain and how to express their feelings. Nice information, thanks. Have a good day.
@inday_lorna1970 (1268)
• United States
13 Jul 10
yes emotional pain is the hardest part of life hard to cure just like cancers..they are silent killers too if you don't know how to handle it.! Yes you need to express it here on mylot or to a friend or family member whom you think can help resolve it. I do have horrible emotional pain before but I did prayed to God released it to him and God show me the way how to deal it and it becomes a blessings in disguise which I did not expect at all.
1 person likes this
@yugasini (12893)
• Secunderabad, India
13 Jul 10
hi jotomy,
yes physical pains can be cured by the pills,injection or tonics,but inner pain should not cured by any thing only the soul will cure,so mostly i never care for inner pains and outer means physical pains also,i am not taking any pills or injections or tonic to cure outer pain and inner pain also,have a nice day
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
15 Jul 10
Emotional pain can be excruciating and difficult to heal. Unlike the physical it cannot be seen by the naked eye and it is often dismissed. People who need time out because of a very badly broken heart, stress, clinical depression or any other mental condition are as seriously ill as others who have physical sickness but they are no so easily understood even by professionals at times. Not many comprehend that one can hurt so much it becomes physical and the inability to get out of bed and live the day when depression strikes is seldom appreciated unless one has experienced it. I wish most folks were more inclined to share how they feel but so many, especially males have been culturally or environmentally conditioned to bottle emotions up and that is a real shame…
@vandana7 (100297)
• India
13 Jul 10
I agree. Talking and letting others makes the pain lose its importance, and over the years I think it reduces itself to be just another story. At least that is how I treat my pain now. Just about an year ago, things that would have brought tears to my eyes, no longer do! I can be really dispassionate about it all. That is all that pain is. It decreases with sharing. That is so true!
@good2go2001 (915)
• United States
13 Jul 10
I know for myself that hiding the emotional pain for so many years had impacted my physical health. I think you are right that in order for emotional pain to heal one needs to be able to release it by telling someone else that is going to respond in a healthy way. I have hid it for so many years that it just sorta ate away at me and now i have to face it. I think it would have been much easier for me to face the emotional pain and abuse in the beginning rather than to keep it hid for this many years.
@charmlenile (387)
•
13 Jul 10
This is how people act when they have been hurt and abuse. No matter how good that person being hurt they're will come a time that they revenge to the person who says something bad.lonely and devastated. on my own experience you have to let go and send it with prayers and so on. .
