Mother.Again.

Hi Silver! Sorry to hear that you are having those kind of problems. I can't answer why your mom doesn't want to see you happy...maybe she isn't happy herself and can't stand to see some one else happy? And she chooses the same words over and over, because in the past they have worked. If you continue to act like they don't bother you, it eventually will take the wind out of her sails. Are you the only person she's doing this to? Or, does she have other 'targets' when you aren't around? Has she always done this, or is this recent? Some medical conditions can begin with unreasonable anger. Alzheimer's is one, I'm sure there are many. It is said that it's easiest to hurt those we love. It stands to reason that it's also easiest to be hurt BY those we love. I don't know if you still live with your mom, or if you are on your own. Distance would perhaps help. Sometimes it works to treat a parent as a child, too. Reminders that, "If you talk to me that way, I won't see you for a week" type of thing. Reward for good behavior...etc. If it doesn't get better, I'll just have to adopt you myself!

People who are important to us can wound us the most. Just remember you are allowing this, you are responsible for your reaction. One thing you might try is to record the conversation word for word. If you can record it on a machine, then write it out, this will give you clues as to how the hurt ocures. You may be surprised by how much your own mind adds to the hurt. I suffered from this for years until someone was with me when it happened and then I got to listen to the whole thing from their point of view. It really helped me understand how much I was reading into my Mother's words. Blessings

Maybe it is because she is not happy herself, or she is so frustrated with her own life and she wants you to be better than her, but she does not know how to get you motivated to be more and more better than herself. At the end, I think you mother loves you. She just does not know how to love you.

i don't think she is hurting you !!! i think it could be advice to you which you feel as if she is hurting you!!!

Im sorry to hear that from you. Just pray to God that he will enlighten your mother. Never fight back or have an ill eelings towards your mother coz you wont be here if not because of your mother. Instead continue to love her, let her feel your love and pray to God

Yeah, some parents had bad parents, so they do the same. The were raised that way. And you care, because still, she is your mother...

Hi, silvercoin, I am really sorry to hear that. Mothers are nothing less than God to us. Most mothers are very good. It's quite unfortunate that you have a rare kind of mother. I only can hope that things will change soon and your mother will shower you with love and care.

Some parents aren't really good parents. Any chance of getting away from the situation?

hi silvercoin, do not think other wise,due to some irritation your mother said like that,do not hear her words about you ,hear in this ear and leave with the other ear,now it is better for you,first tell me what is your problem with your mother,is there any other persons in the house,what about them with your mother,do not worry,have a nice day

thougths are with you., My own mother was a hurtful mother to me., she caused much bad feeling between my brothers and siters that in the end none of us speak to one another... she also casued problems between her children and our father., for what seemed no real good reason she didnt make the family but split the family her family which goes against all what a mother should be., this was many years ago as i am over 50 now, and in those days no one would believ that a mother could be so harmful and it caused me a lot of shame to myself.. but it took a long time to realise that it was not my fault, as with my brothers and sisters, but we still do not speak to one another because she damaged the relationships so badly.. so my heart and love reaches out to you and can only say you are not the cause of her misery that keeps her feeling so bad.., and you will be remembered in my prayers i understand how you will feel a lot of the time but can tell you it will get better for you when you get your own home and your own children.. i could never repeat what my mother did to me on my children and didnt so be encouraged as hard as it is some days you will get past this time much love x