You're too old to have a baby!
By stacyv81
@stacyv81 (5903)
United States
July 28, 2010 3:15pm CST
I was watching a show on tv about the women above 40 who are having children and some people say way to go and others say how selfish!
Where do you stand in this debate?
Do you think it is fair that people have something to say when an older women mothers or wants to mother a child, but say nothing when an older man fathers a child? Are both parents not just important?
What do you think?
1 person likes this
8 responses
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
28 Jul 10
They are not being selfish. Maybe they did not meet the right man yet until they were in their late thirties. Maybe they decided that they did not just want to marry anyone and wind up in the divorce court, maybe they had a job where they could not meet anyone. One never knows how life treats them and just because one is over 40 does not mean that they are suddenly going to go downhill fast from there.
Besides if it is all right for a man to father a child, why not a woman? AFter all, he just comes and plays with the child, but the mother is with the child almost twenty-four hours a day.
1 person likes this
@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
29 Jul 10
Well.....I dont know you cant really judge every father that way especially now as there are more and more working moms and more and more stay at home dads.
But youre right you shouldnt judge anyone, let alone decide who should and when they should bear children.. =)
@suspenseful (40192)
• Canada
30 Jul 10
Well I can understand fathers who have businesses at home, but there are more of the other type then there was before. And I do find it ironic that years ago one was told that they were too young to have children and there were lots of women who did not have children until they were in their 30s and 40s. Now because of all these young teenage moms, people start to feel that once you turn 30 you are over the hill and I happened to live in that transaction period. Before I was too young, and when we went to adopt and I told them my age, they said I was too old and was in my early thirties.
We did manage to adopt the twins though and they probably assumed because of medical problems they would die or be retarded. Did not happen. Both graduated from University, both work for the government, one is in charge of data processing and is a computer geek, the other is an accountant.
@vjenkins86 (1478)
• United States
28 Jul 10
I don't see how the women can be called selfish just because they decide to have babies over the age of 40. I'm sure they have been warned about the complications that can occur and all the other things they need to worry about. It's their decision, their bodies, their lives and they are old enough to think rationally- hopefully. I think those people who feel entitled to pass judgment on those women really need to take a step back.
@stacyv81 (5903)
• United States
29 Jul 10
Well they call them selfish because they think their want for a child is outranking their childs need for a parent...because they will die before their child reaches a certain age, and will no longer have a parent...
However, I chooose the side that says even a young parent could die the next day you never know....
@SViswan (12051)
• India
19 Jan 11
I'm no one to judge and I think it's a personal choice. As long as I'm not one involved or these people are not thrusting their ideas in my head or their baby on me to be taken care of, I think each person should be free to choose when they wish to have a baby. They are the ones wanting the baby and raising the child. Why should anyone else have an opinion on that?
@luvstochat (6907)
• United States
4 Aug 10
Well my mom was 41 when she had me so I don't think people over 40 are to old to have a baby. Today is my moms 75th birthday too! I was born perfectly normal. As long as you are healthy I don't see anything wrong in having a baby at 40.
@Laurenzixi (134)
• Finland
4 Aug 10
I think and i know that than older you are than more you have change to get a sic child...sic = breathing problems, down syndrome etc.
@Turingskie (387)
• Philippines
5 Aug 10
It is not fair because my mom got pregnant when she raised are younger sister she was the 43 yrs old when she gave birth.i just considered it as a gift from God.
@maximax8 (31046)
• United Kingdom
1 Aug 10
One of my male friends dated a lady that was 44 years old. She desperately tried to get pregnant but sadly it didn't happen. Maybe she left it too long to get pregnant naturally. Some ladies older than that try to get pregnant using the test tube method.
If a lady aged 40 has a baby she will be 58 years old when her child reaches age 18. I think that is fine. She will probably have enough energy to raise her child. I think that is is alright if a lady has a baby and she is between 40 and 50 years old. After age 50 I think it is too late. I have heard about a 62 year old lady having a baby for example.
People say nothing if the wife is 36 years old and the husband is 58 years old plus she has a baby. I believe that age 35 to 40 years old is the better age to have a baby. I believe that from 40 to 45 years old would be a very late time.
@parrot2010 (812)
•
28 Jul 10
To be honest 40 isn't too bad, I think the cut off line is about 45. It may seem selfish though because by the time the child is a teenager a mother/father will look like grannies and people will probably assume they are grandparents instead of parents. Also the parents may become too crippled to look after the child some time later so it's sort of unfair on the child. I guess ladies can adopt but naturally people want their own biological children which is fine but you do have to think about your and the baby's future. A woman had 40 years to have a child so in a way a woman has lost her chance of having a baby.
