keep trying or give up?
By starn88
@starn88 (7)
United States
July 29, 2010 11:56pm CST
i've been in a relationship for awhile and than she decided to breakup with me saying " we need a break" every since than she been acting like my friend telling me she loves me fore-playing and such. yet she wants a boyfriend [not me] and downs me often. and treats me like she loves me than uses me the next moment it feels like. recently i've met someone.. i have a crush on her.. but i've falled so much in love with the first one that i can not even fully look at another girl without thinking of her. and i can not attempt to go out or think along those lines.. she i keep trying for the one i love or give up?
19 responses
@rose005 (254)
• India
30 Jul 10
Keep trying for the first one. You should not give up so easily for the one you loves. Crush is happening time and again but you will not know how that person is as you know your girl.
@starn88 (7)
• United States
30 Jul 10
some more details...
i've been trying for over 5 months. she tells me she loves me. but she uses me.
and than she says she loves me like a brother and a lover at the same time.. kinda weired me out some...
she tells me she likes someone else. that she thinks i should move on tpye thing..
even after i explained how i fill how i cried till i no longer had tears even while i cried in her arms... i just wanted to die.. she doe snot seem to share the same love as i have for her. and this other girl and i was talking about this.
she says that she has yet to expirence love liek we have, that she does not understand what we're going through for she is dealing with breakup as well after 4 years of being with him and being engaged and things.he broke her heart...
like the other girl did mine..
she is not first to do so.. but she is the first to crush me so much and destroy my ability to have hope.
in the past i've always had girls whom cheated on me. she was the first to not do so.. she was also first for me to fall madly in love with and loss virtually all intrest in other girls.. and this other girl is bringing it back and has givin me some hope.. its just i am still lost.. she told me i lost her just two months of dating.. that she did not share same feelings for me as she did and yet she dated me for 6 more months.broke up right after valentines day.
so basically i have a crush one someone whom is going through same thing as i.. pretty much.. someone whom uderstands...
i just want to get it off my chest and see if anyone can offer good advice.. thank you people i do not know. maybe some one will have the magic words.
@randylovesdar (4932)
• United States
30 Jul 10
If the first girl is using you then you do not need her. She is not worth your time. Take some time for yourself and thinking about what you want out of life. For example, if you want to learn something new go back to school. Join a club that interests you. When someone hurts you you need time to heal. I would not jump in to another relationship right now in fear that you may get hurt again. Take care
@hardworkinggurl (37063)
• United States
30 Jul 10
It is obvious you care about her dearly or you would not give it your time. Sometimes it is not healthy to persist as your feelings and trust get hurt deeper to where your character changes towards all women.
Time and another interest heals all wounds, it is awaiting for the time that is a killer. A little space may allow you enough time to realize that this is too painful for you, however it is that space that may make her realize how valuable you are.
Good luck to you with this and welcome-welcome to myLot! 
@chefjo (13)
• Philippines
30 Jul 10
remember the saying love is patient...understanding? when she broke up with you, just let her go. if she comes back, she is really meant for you. it she does not,you are never meant to be. no need to rush things. it is not a race. give it a time. in a relationship the love between two people must be reciprocal not one sided because both have to nurture it to grow. look beyond the the garden, enjoy the park.
@heisable (1)
• United States
30 Jul 10
You need someone that loves you with all of their heart. You do not need a part time love. Trying to satisfy her and she has nothing to give in return. When I was a child I acted like a child and played like a child. Now that I am older I need to put away childlike behaviors. Try some thing new e.g. Banana Soup?
@apresto (127)
• Bulgaria
30 Jul 10
Giving up is not a good choice in relationships. You shouldn't do that. If you're breaking that means you're breaking. Break up. If you still love her you can love her without being with her. Try to find a thing that can cheer both of you. That kind of things can recover a relationship in total. Be careful, though.
@edwardjoy2000 (2387)
• United Arab Emirates
30 Jul 10
I have been married for almost 2 years now...and i am going through a bad state now. I have problems in my relationship...I have asked for advise from people and they say that i should give up and move on. But i dont believe in it. I dont believe in giving up...I will try and i know that i will succeed in getting back my love. the hope give me more confidence to perform in life.
@DAFFODIL88 (3)
• Philippines
30 Jul 10
and yes, i guess letting go is the best thing to do... since she already made the point that she wants someone else, i think it's wiser if you protect yourself from further harm...well, if someone else comes along, go for it :) at least you left because she chose it not because you intended to be with someone else :)
@DAFFODIL88 (3)
• Philippines
30 Jul 10
i understand the fact that the hardest part in a relationship is letting go...but honestly, if you wouldn't try, you really couldn't....always remember that love is just in our mind...the moment you think that you could get over her, well as i said it wouldn't be that easy, but in time you would :)
@aldawn22 (224)
• Philippines
30 Jul 10
Try and try until you die, that's the famous saying that we often hear when someone wants to quit. Try to win her back just like what you did the first that you fell in love with each other. If you really love her then don't be afraid to take a risk, just wait and maybe she will realize your worth but if it's not possible to have her back then probably that's the time to let go. If it's not healthy anymore then there is no use pushing yourself on the scene. Everybody has to move on and grow, all of us deserves to be happy. :))
@blueblacknpk (14)
•
30 Jul 10
keep trying if you give up what you wanted to achieve will never work..
@phoenix867 (182)
• India
30 Jul 10
Keep on trying the first one because we cant give our love so easily and you keep in touch with her,one day you will be successful.Crush happens between two lovers and even misunderstanding crates problem who knows your girl is more perfect and she is the best in her own way.So never give up until you success in it.
@mightyspartan (61)
• United States
30 Jul 10
If you keep trying you might get somewhere, but if you see yourself going nowhere then give up. You try when your mind loves something, and you give up because that's the only way.
@meeksilent (514)
• Philippines
30 Jul 10
Don't close your heart for another woman. Its also a process on moving on, you have to fully recover before you can introduce yourself for another relationship so that you wont get confused if there are times you are in doubt.
@pwnson (150)
• India
30 Jul 10
keep your head cool. Don't let other tell you what is the best for you. Think by yourself. That's well said by my friend! That's exactly what i have been doing since 3 month now and i agree with you as even i have seeing amazing result. At the start of January this i decided to stop listening blindly and instead listen to my self and also see what conclusion i can derive from my audience. Thump up for this guest Post! The best i have read here till now.
@hotwheels20 (400)
• India
30 Jul 10
I think you should keep on trying for the one you love, if it is sure that she till loves you. If you happen to have another girl, you cant love her in the same way that you had love the previous one. More over you will be thinking of your previous girl and there is every chances of getting another girl hurt.
