my husband is out...and im disappointed...

Your story hit my hear in hurt. Your husband's head is yours. I can't advise for you, because I am young.

When he comes home, talk to him and tell him the way you felt. First consider a few things, did he know that there was a lot of work to be done around the house? If he did, do you think he realized you wanted to get it done before you went out of town tomorrow? What has he done the past week, has he been busy and working late? Did he say he was going to hang out with friends this weekend anytime this week? My husband and I have learned that though one person is thinking it, it doesn't mean the other knows it, and it's bad to assume they do.

men will always be men...they will leave their wives at home to do all the work. It does happen that men give more priority to their friends, you need to make it clear to him that theres a lot of work at home and you will have to cancell the program as you have not finished it...You need to talk to him when he arrives and let him know how much pain you had to take when he was away and do all the work alone.

I'm a little upset to see the word "hate" in your response...in the same sense that people loosely use the word "love". Now that I've got that off my chest...I'll move on to providing comfort and hopefully some guidance :) I've been married almost 24 years and I can tell you that I've learned a lot in the past six months. I've been unemployed the past six months and they have been the best six months of our marriage...and my wife would say the same thing without any doubt. Like most people, I thought that compromise was a good place for resolution and reconciliation when there were disagreements. I do think that there are times when that is true...BUT...if both people just have a mindset to do what is best for the whole family, you'll avoid a lot of compromise. My days are full, full, full...I do all the cooking, all the dishes, all the laundry, almost all the ironing (a few "frilly" things intimidate my ironing skills), try to walk/run 10,000 steps a day, read, journal, try to make a few dollars online, pay all the bills, and do an hour or two of job search everyday. I've now got a very clear picture of what the other side looks like and am a much more effective leader in my household as a result of it. I've only glanced over the other replies and there are some that say you need to have a talk when he gets home...that may be so...but I hope you'll put the discussion perspective: 1. You can't assume that he "knew" your expecatations if you didn't voice them before he made plans with his friends. 2. You can phrase that discussion in terms of gettng the two of you on the same page where priorities are concered. 3. You don't have to be married twenty years to assess the way responsibilities are shared in the household...I have a feeling that if he actually takes some more responsibility, he will have a greater appreciation for what you do. Good luck and let me know how it goes :) Abundant Blessings!

#0 mins is not that bad. I understand where your coming from, as a husband, he has responsibilities. Understanding, is one responsibilities you have and must endure these sort of things. If he does extend for and hour maybe then you can really get mad or upset. Just talk it over you two. Guy's are like that, I am assuming you know that by now. (smiles) You just have to have a little patience.

Your need when he come back then talk with his.. and understand with his...And say what you need with his. I think its good for you.

It sounds like this has happened to you more than once. His actions are disrespectful. You need to confront him. However, if he continues to do this over and over after you confront him once, twice, three times, he really does not respect you. You can decide if you want to spend you life like this. You might want to give a bit less to him.

Like you said p3ks626, you have a lot to do before you leave so don't waist your energy on being angry at him. We (women) are disappointed all the time by our significant other and yes it hurts when they are not supportive like they should but you are strong and independant and can DEFINITELY hold things down so go on and do what needs to be done sweetie and enjoy your hometown visit. Take care and God bless!

Hi, p3ks626. It is best to talk with him about how you feel. Tell him that you would appreciate it if he helped you around the house more. He has to be able to compromise with you at times too. Maybe when he gets back home, he will be able to help you around the house some.

hahaha..... it seems that you are angry enough. be cool my friends. i think your love does not work with him. kidding. no need to be disappointed. i think he was fully stressed that time and wanted some relieves, so he is out. no need to hate him and i believe that i am the most inconsiderate person in the world. so just think. take care and give us a smile.

I think that there are alot of men out there that tend to just do alot of things without even thinking.I find that it is no good trying to drop them hints if you want them todo things for you.I think that you should tell him that you expected some help from him.

There are many things we have to consider why the people we love do such behaviors that tend to make us feel very disappointed. Though men really have many unpredicted behaviors, Women find many ways to understand even it comes to a form of abuse on much greater emotional aspect. I believe you know your husband, as much we are here, and I am thankful for sharing your inner feelings with us. I believe aside from other factors you can see on his actions, the one thing of the possibility , is that your husband may do feel that you have a greater personality than him, seemingly he sees you a tough and ideal woman that maybe, he unintentionally able to hurt your feelings. The fact you are much busy that he is, you assure of your quality time together. I guess both of you need to talk over this matter because it may turn out serious problem in the end. So, both of you can share your true feelings and insights about your relationship and what has to be done to solve them. Your husband tend to divert his attentions to his peers that unknowingly can give big negative effect in your quality time together. IF your husband is more of a passive type one, you can expect him moving over the situation than facing it, and you have to make that first initiative, If he is a pride one man, then I guess, one has to adjust and be more considerate enough till your problem had been fixed. Because, he is not solving the problem at all, he is just making the relationship worst and all your efforts will be just nothing to him for he will find ways to blame or make other conclusions he do not understand at all. Or, maybe he cannot tell you directly the things he do not like.Either way, have a one-sit conversation with him, so that you are not kept hanging with all your plans together with him. So, that next time, you will not feel disappointed anymore with him. Either he changed his actions or not towards his insensitivity, still, you had been able to be an ideal woman for any guy who wished and opted to have. Happy mylotting..

well, to be honest you cant really expect men to help out and have initiative. My husband always goes out with peers on the eve or 2 nights before we have to transfer houses. we had move from places because of different issues and he always goes out regardless of how tiring and how many things you have to pack. He never bother to take the initiative to stay at home and help out before drinking with his friends. I don't know if its coincidence or his habit. It's really frustrating but I guess men are always 2x immature as women.When they're tired from work, they are tired and no more discussions but have the energy to go out with friend while women regardless if working or stay at home has no rights to be tired or lazy. I understand your feeling and when they do that, you just really want to smack them right there and then

i feel for you p3ks626! today is saturday so he has no work until later afternoon. so i cooked his favorite dish for lunch. and just a while ago he told me that he will go out with his friends to play with his officemates and will be back at 2pm and there is nothing i can do. i feel so bad right now. i dont know maybe because i am taking this hormone medicines and my hormones are not in a right place or whatever. he knows that i am more sensitive as ever and i do not know if i am pregnant or not!!! plus! i will eat alone. i hate it! i hate the fact that he will go play woth his friends while i am sitting here alone. i am sorry i cant comfort you because i am also pissed with my husband!

Many husbands are like your husbands so do not feel bad.