I worried so much!
By katsmeow1213
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
United States
August 16, 2010 7:54am CST
So, my daughter spent the weekend with my mom and my 15 yr old sister. I knew all along that my daughter would have a good time, even if they didn't do anything fun. It was a chance for my daughter to get out of the house, and away from her brothers. She got to make her own choices all weekend, like what to eat and what to watch on TV.. Friday night she got a pizza all to herself and was able to decide whatever toppings she wanted on it.. which never happens here at home.
But I couldn't help worrying anyways! Normally when my kids are with a babysitter (usually just my mom or hubby's dad) I worry more about the babysitter. I know 5 kids can be overwhemling, and I don't like being gone for too long in case the babysitter has had enough of them!
But this time I worried like crazy over my daughter. I guess it's because it was the first time she was away from home overnight by herself. The only other time she's spent the night away from home all of my kids were there, and I rarely worry about them when the oldest is there with them.. I know that even if the babysitter can't handle them, he can because he's used to it.
Friday night I didn't even have a phone to call them, so I kept sending my mother and my sister messages on Facebook. My sister isn't much of a talker.. when I asked her how my daughter was her response was "Fine".. then I told her to have mom msg me because at least mom would tell me what my daughter was doing.
Then my mom (who is legally blind) told me that on Saturday she'd be taking my daughter on the public bus down to the mall to see a movie.. which is extremely exciting for my daughter. She's never ridden a public bus and I don't think she's ever been to a movie theater (too expensive).. but at the same time I was terrified because my mom lives in the city which scares me a little bit.. and because, as I said, my mom is practically blind!
But everything turned out great. My daughter had a really good time, my mom enjoyed seeing the movie (something she'd been wanting to see but my sister refused to go with her.. they saw Despicable Me). I was worried for nothing.. but I guess that's a parent's job.
I was actually surprised at how much I worried, and how anxious I was to get my daughter back home.. even though I knew she was having a good time. As I said, I don't normally worry about my kids, normally I just cherish the time I have away from them because it doesn't happen often. But I guess it all comes with being a parent.. right?
Do you worry a lot about your kids when they aren't with you.. even though they're with someone you completely trust, like your own parents?
1 person likes this
15 responses
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
17 Aug 10
First of all, let me say how excited I became on knowing all that your daughter did (yes, me…) coz it brought back memories of my own childhood days when I could escape, albeit a few times only, the clutches of my over-protective mom … it was like heaven… the feeling of being on my own, doing my own things, nobody to answer to…oh yes, I’m sure your daughter enjoyed her weekend very very much.
Now for you… yes, its but very very natural as a parent to worry over our kids and I knew (you knew too) just how much you would imagine so many things which could go wrong (but never will, don’t worry).
As for your mom…my mom says that grandkids are like interests off principle amount, hence more treasured and cherished and awaited. So no matter how senile or blind or incapable they become, for their grandkids, they just manage to be on their best. I know coz my own mom is half blind and suffering from Alzheimer’s, yet for my son you cant imagine what all she can achieve…I think it gives them a new lease, rejuvenates them.
@sudiptacallingu (10879)
• India
18 Aug 10
Yes, I do understand...I think naturally we mothers worry more about daughters than sons
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
17 Aug 10
See, the problem is, some of those terrible things happened to me when I was a child. I won't say they happened right under my mother's nose.. but when she did find out they happened she didn't do a whole lot about it. Because of those instances I've become completely neurotic about a few things. It's not just the fact that it was my mother though... I worry like that whenever my daughter isn't in a typical setting, like with me, her dad, or her school. And I do worry more about her than my older boys.
@aurorastorm (1131)
• United States
17 Aug 10
I am a worry wart so I don't know if you should go by me but this will make you feel better. I worry about my son even when he is with my husband, and that is his son also, lol. My son is in camp everyday right now and until I get him in my car and home I always worry about his safety. I think as a mother we worry about our children because we love them so much and don't want anything to happen to them. I even worry about my dog too, there is no end to who or what I worry about unfortunately.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
17 Aug 10
I am not that bad. I don't worry about them when they're at school. I don't worry much about them when I leave them with their dad. Mostly I worry about my youngest 2 who are 2 and 4 and can get into a lot of trouble.. if they're out of the house I worry about them.. but none of the other ones really.
@GardenGerty (160491)
• United States
16 Aug 10
My children are adults.
Their daddy was a truck driver, and I did not live near family to babysit them. One time, when the whole situation was fairly new to me, they were like five or six and two or three, my brother and his wife came to visit. I remember going to K Mart, and just hanging around. It caused me so much anxiety, because I did not have them in the cart, or holding their hands and it felt just like my arms had been cut off.
So, I can identify with how you felt.
It will pass.
Their daddy was a truck driver, and I did not live near family to babysit them. One time, when the whole situation was fairly new to me, they were like five or six and two or three, my brother and his wife came to visit. I remember going to K Mart, and just hanging around. It caused me so much anxiety, because I did not have them in the cart, or holding their hands and it felt just like my arms had been cut off. So, I can identify with how you felt. It will pass.@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
16 Aug 10
I'm okay with being away from them for a few hours. Like I said, they're usually with my mom or hubby's dad, and I'm comfortable with that.. plus my oldest is usually around, he's 13 and I know that he's pretty much capable of taking care of them himself. I have no problems with that at all... like I said, I worry more about whoever is watching them than I'm worried about the kids, lol.
@jillhill (37354)
• United States
16 Aug 10
I know how that is...my parents used to take the kids when they were little for a whole week. The first couple of days I relaxed a bit...after that it was...I was so lonely for them! I never really worried a bunch about them...with the exception of the fact that they never really wanted to come back home again! LOL
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
16 Aug 10
I just remembered that when my oldest was 4 my foster mom took him for a week, and brought him on lots of little day trips. I didn't worry at all about him, and I had a great time by myself that week. I guess it depends on the person, the child, and the situation. Also I'm a lot more neurotic than I was 9 years ago, lol.
@3SnuggleBunnies (16374)
• United States
17 Aug 10
Yep I used to call alot when we'd go out on date nights & my in-laws would watch them. Mainly cause they are older, strict on certain things, but they are usually fine. And by the time we come back they've had enough of Grandma & Grandpa that they take a nap by the door waiting or sit staring out their front window waiting for us to pull up.
But you know it sounds like she had a good time bonding w/ your Mother and a break from all her brothers.
@katsmeow1213 (28716)
• United States
17 Aug 10
That almost sounds sad that they're so anxious for you to get home for them. Your in laws probably don't keep them entertained much, do they? My FIL can be like that.. but for the most part my kids have no trouble talking his ear off or watching cartoons he puts on for them.
@dcollins (16)
• United States
17 Aug 10
I worry or at least think of my boys all the time. I was never like this before kids and now I'm only like it with my sons.
I'm sure its just motherly instincts but I sure wish I could get over the empty sinking feeling I have when my children are not with me.
@w1042510118 (35)
• China
17 Aug 10
Oh, it turns out that parents devote their entire life to their children since the baby was born. What can I do to payback my parents?
@Angelgirl16 (2171)
• United States
17 Aug 10
Hi Katsmeow,
I knew she would have a great time spending the weekend with your mom and young aunt. I am sure she had plenty to talk about when she came home, without a scratch on her.
I don't have young one living with me, but I can understand a mother worrying about her children when they are out of her sight, even if they are with a relative, even their grandparent(s). However, I would think that we should not have to worry so much if it is the grandparent(s) that they are spending time with.
By riding on a public bus with a legally blind person,your daughter was able to see her grandmother's world something she had never experienced before. Going to see a movie with grandmother had to be thrilling for her. Overall, I would say she had a great weekend.
Now she is safely back home where you can see that she is okay.
I don't have young one living with me, but I can understand a mother worrying about her children when they are out of her sight, even if they are with a relative, even their grandparent(s). However, I would think that we should not have to worry so much if it is the grandparent(s) that they are spending time with.
By riding on a public bus with a legally blind person,your daughter was able to see her grandmother's world something she had never experienced before. Going to see a movie with grandmother had to be thrilling for her. Overall, I would say she had a great weekend.
Now she is safely back home where you can see that she is okay.
@dorannmwin (36392)
• United States
18 Aug 10
I think that it is a natural part of being a parent to have a little bit of separation anxiety when you are away from your kids. However, Kathryn has been spending the night with my in-laws since she was tiny and has spending the night with my mom at least once a month since we moved out and I don't have a lot of anxiety when she is with them. The problem for me comes into play with when she is spending the night with her friends. She's gone to the farm twice with some of our neighbors and that actually almost tears me up.
@akopoaysi (739)
• Philippines
17 Aug 10
hi kats! hey i think it is your job to worry. but i dont see anything wrong about your daughter spending the weekends to your mom. my sisters always does that. my mom even requested to my other sister to spend the weekend to their house the boys are 3 years old and the other one is 10months old. but they have their own nanny. plus, dont you noticed, that grandparents are the spoilers. actually they are the best spoilers! next are aunties and uncles.
have fun to all!
@dreamkeeper (455)
• United States
17 Aug 10
weel, i guess being a parent it is just a normal thing to be worried of your kids. Whoever parents that do not worry their kids is not a good parents. So first all i can say is that you are a good mom you really care alot about your kids and they are bless to have a mom like you. As of now i cannot relate being a parent coz i just got married now and we do not have kids as of now but i know as what you are saying czo my mom is just like you. She is very protectvie to us and cares for us so much and i am so thankf ul that is like that when we wre just a kid. Thanks mom well, if you are worried about your daughter coz she's in your mom house and as what you said it is a city and it is not a nice city. Why not when your daughter visit your mom let you older kid go with her at least you will not be so wooried so much..
@gangstaaaz (65)
• Libya
16 Aug 10
you should had a son you won't be worried at all.
sometimes i think i will not get married if i had gitls
@w1042510118 (35)
• China
17 Aug 10
I really couldn't understand. Your mom will take care her carefully, you needn't be worried. There is a saying in my country "Closeness skips generation.", it means your mom spoils your daughter more than you.
@ravinskye (8237)
• United States
16 Aug 10
I sometimes worry about my kids if they are with anyone other than my parents. Like you said, it doesn't happen that often that they are gone so I cherish it lol. With my parents I don't worry at all. The only worry that I have is that my kids are being good for them. Now with anyone else I worry some. I'm glad your daughter had a good time. My parents took my girls for a day of stuff and really enjoyed it. The girls liked the one on one time without their little brother getting in the way and stealing attention.
