do you lend your friend money if he/she asks of you?

What you did was VERY RIGHT!!!! You offered food, if she really needed then she would have accepted. Yes I lend money to my friends but they are friends not acquaintance there is a difference. I don't have this problem anymore because I don't have cash and all I do is on a credit card. If you are ever in doubt about what to do, remember your family comes first and you can't give away your money to support someone else. Our church has a policy if someone is in need and ask for money. We have paid electric and gas bills, we have paid for groceries for the family but we have NEVER handed out $$$. The need is not in the money, it is in food, heat, clothes, etc. If that is what they really want the money for they will be happy with what you offer.

hello dear,i have been wanting to respond here when it was still new but i hardly find my time to get in this discussion. well,about your topic,i also experienced the same thing.there are people who are really like that. who are used to borrowing money but then,it's hard for them to pay.and i always got victimized by those people cause i am always too kind to reach out and help them. but after all those people who have run away from their debts,i just wished them well. it's hard to trust people if they always fulfill their said date of payment. there's nothing wrong with what you did,my dear! if you want t help,it doesn't always have to be money. it's still nice that you have offered food instead for them,but they refused,is that? meaning they have always wanted the money,and not telling truth on where do they have to spend it.

If a friend was in need and i had the money to offer, i would gladly lend it to a friend. Getting the money repaid isn't as important as helping someone in a time of crisis. When we loan money to anyone, there is always the chsnce it will not be repaid. Some day this friend may be in a position to do you a favor. It is the gestures we show to one another that are important, not just the money we have.

Of I will, He/she is a friend. If ever he/she didn't pays me back, then it is he/she have a problem not me. At least on the second time, he/she will not borrow anymore since he/she owes me already.

if it is one of my dearest friends, I would never hesitate to let her borrow money and would not mind if she does pay back or not. If it's someone else, I can't just let anyone borrow easily. What you did was right. We should never tolerate or make those people dependent on others.

The last time I lend my friend a sum of money for his father's medicine as what she told me was June last year and until now she hasn't pay me back even half of it. Then, I saw her newly posted photos having good times in Malaysia and yet she told me she's waiting for her fiance's remittance to enable to pay me. The issue here is not about money now, it is about her integrity to me. I don't know if I can still trust her.

i think what you did are right. i seldom lend money to others because i'm having financial problem too. i think we shouldn't lend money to someone easily, especially someone we do not know much about them. we can't just give away the money every time a person need. finding out what is the root cause of the problem is the only way to help them.

Well, money is the basic problem for everybody. That too, borrowing is really a bad habit. You are 100% right in denying and offering rice and fish for her children. This is really a great thoughtful gesture seldom practiced. If the lady wants money for her family expenses, food for children, this is the only way to deal with the situation. At some point of time, she will definitely realise, you will not lend money, instead help her only in kind. You have already known that she borrows everywhere not to be returned. Why can't you explain her on the face that you don't lend money because it will sure affect the relationship. The family requirements, if she is needy, can be arranged. And also forget about those clothes you gave her for selling. If the money worth comes back, well and good, otherwise take it as a charity. But do not give any more clothes. If she still insists, ask her the buyers directly to you. Ofcourse, it will be nail on her head if you do that.

I always lend money to my friends whenever they ask me to. I know, it's a big problem, ayt? I am finding some reasons how to solve this one though.

Ya I lend money to my friends, and i also borrow money from them but we oftentimes pay our debts, even if it take some time.........In your case you do what you think is best for you and your friends family. If I were in you condition I will do the same..............

It depends on the friend and also on the amount.But in your case you did good.You should not lend her money.She will keep asking for more and never pay back.If she keeps insisting you have to say it: NO! ....or try go give her food until she will understand that you will never give her money.

Hi, I stick to the concept, "Credit makes enemies, lets be friends." Lending money to so called friends is not a very good practice unless you are willing to lose the friendship as well as the money. First of all, if you don't know what they are using the money for, you may be enabling them to do negative things without knowing it. If you have a true friend, you will not even let them ask you for a loan. You will know the situation they are in and you will offer to help. At least that is my way of thinking. If a friend loses a job and cannot pay his/her rent or cannot feed his/her children, paying the rent or feeding them for one month or for one day is not going to do much anyway. Perhaps you will take your friend in, help them get on his/her feet and share your food with his/her children. But simply giving money time and time again makes me think that lady friend of yours is suspect. I don't think she has many true friends.

There's a lot of people like that. I think you should investigate first where her money is going, Maybe she has some addiction or something. Ask some your friends what they know about that person. I would not lend to that kind of person though I know a few. They borrow from someone to pay for someone. Its like debt paying debt. I also watch a television show where they discuss that kind of topic and they say that it is very addictive to borrow money.

you were on the right to have not lending her money. because of the reasons you've stated and still, it is not certain with what she does with the money. in my case i would lend money to friends if i have it and if i have all the necessary facts as to why she borrows. like if she/he is sincere about it and if she/he did not lie about her reasons if it's the opposite then i'll also keep my money but politely reject them and offer other means on how they can get the amount they need

If there is any one who need help and if I have any in my pocket I give them what they need as long as they are really needy. For me no reasons just ask me and if i have money, why not to help. But sometimes they are taking advantage of always borrowing money even they are not really in need. I am agree with what you did. The woman try to borrow money for foods and because you know her attitude of lending money and as you know her needs better to give her foods instead of money so she solve her problem immediately. She resist because there is something behind the money she needs. You did a good decision. Have a good day!

Hi genevy04, You did the right thing by not lending this person any money. It seems obvious that she doesn't need the money to buy food for her family, becasue you tried to give her food instead of money and she refused accept your help. She want cash. I think she has a bad reputation of not repaying loans. She is being dishonest with different people and you have learned from them about their experence with her. You are also waiting on money (which you probably won't see) that she owes you for the sale of something you give her to sale. You have all the evidence you need, to know that you are doing the right thing by saying no to her everytime she wants to borrow money from you.

If that friend have bad debt record , Then do not lend her the money. What you did is right.

I used to try to deal with things like this on a case by case basis, be sensitive to the need, and do the right thing. I can tell you that I have been married for almost 24 years and we have had parents, friends, and relatives with us most of those years because we were too compassionate. We also made a huge mistake an co-signed for some friends...have lent money...paid a utility bill for someone and all sorts of stuff like that. I can say from experience that I would rather care too much and be taken advantage of occasionally; however, when over the course of 23 years of marriage the caring is the normal rather than occassionally it is time to reconsider. A few months ago, I read a book called "The Richest Man in Babylon" and it was a pretty sensible story. The biggest piece of information I gathered from it was this: "When you help people, do not help them in a way that allows their problems to become your problems." So...if it is a little money and I can spare it, that is fine. On the other hand, if it is a little money and it is all the time...I feel that 1.) I have not helped the person become responsible, and 2.) The person has come to expect it. Neither of those are acceptable to me. So...you have to decide where you draw the line. I understand your concern for her kids...I applaud you offering food. The question is how do you help your friend become responsible? good luck and abundant blessings!

I have a friend like yours..it's very difficult to say no because of the friendship that you have..sometimes it's a little bit abuse.. you've done a right thing.not anytime she needs you to lend her a money you give, you have already give her explanation that you don't have a cash.It's up to her to understand

I did that one time and they still owe me about 30 bucks. I think I am going to sue him because he also threatened me. But thats not your concern! If they are a really close friend then I say go for It. But It is all based on trust if you trust them then its up to you. munchieman69 (^_^)