Can we trust a friend?
By figurativeme
@figurativeme (1089)
Philippines
August 20, 2010 8:47pm CST
How often do we get disappointed with friends and colleagues? We thought we know the friend well enough when suddenly ... Oooopppsss! The friend does something that takes us by surprise big time and in a negative way! We don't know the friend after all.
We are complacent and trustful in a relationship simply because we take them at face value only to get hurt and disappointed when suddenly a behavior comes out of the mask and the true colors appear.
Can we ever know what's inside a friend's mind and therefore avoid being hurt in the process?
1 person likes this
17 responses
@mimeux (62)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
My answer would be possible. If you and your friend is together for a long time and both of you keep secrets and both of you are honest to each other then there would be no problem in trusting. But having a trustworthy and true friend is hard to find . So when you have found one keep him and protect him like a treasure.
Based on my experience I have friends but I only trust a few. Know why? aside from the fact that My friend and I were together for years I was touched that she share a secret to me and as a promise that I would not tell it.
So I did. And she also kept my secret that made both of us closer to each other. I guess, friendship is strengthen through ups and downs and whenever necessary, they argue and when it's over they are okay again. Much better.
@prettyjoy1000 (1)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
i agree what you said..,but there some instances that your friend does not trusted you....as i expercienced...,i had a friend who's willing to help me and she knew whats my secrets...as well my bf..but time came....,she and my bf had a relation..,it's hurt in my part 'cause i tell all my emotons to her..
it is better not to trust to a friend...trust in yourself..
@figurativeme (1089)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
Hi prettyjoy! I had this experience, too. I had a friend whom I considered the best of friends since we were in college together and shared experiences and secrets together. Until I found out by accident that she was having a relationship with my by. Ugh!
@cripfemme (7698)
• United States
22 Aug 10
I don't think you can fully trust someone even if your related to them. People get into a situation and act in ways that they them self don't approve of i know iv done it much to my embarrassment this is why i don't think i will funny trust a human being on this earth weather I'm related to them or there my friends or whatever
@Angelgirl16 (2171)
• United States
21 Aug 10
Hi figurativeme,
Do we really know anyone? No really. People change every second of the day. They do and say thing this day that they would not have thought about the day before. No one will be the same all the time. We can not put our total trust in what we know or see in a person.
Friends and family will,every once in awhile, disappoint you, but if you love them you forgive them and be alittle less convinced that they will never disappoint you again. We are humans and humans are not perfect. Therefore, if you choice to have friends, you cannot avoid being hurt or disappointed sometime.
@lfloresca (116)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
For me I trust all my friends even though they are only few. We were friends since 1st year college and now we are in 4th year and its been 3 years so I can't imagine that my friends will do bad things or say something to hurt me, if you respect your friend and your friend do the same thing I think you trust each other in that way.
@marella4u (12)
• India
21 Aug 10
after all friend is the only one who can correct your mistakes share your thoughts ,all your emotional feelings what ever it may be but i can say you one thing without a friend you cant achieve anything...
u can only think in a similar way but not exactly as your friend think because its highly impossible for every one to think as your friend ...okay let me make it clear may be some times you can think like your friend but not all the times ..its hard for any one to know what others are thinking about!!!
after all it depends on how you intake those what ever your friend says ...taking that in a positive sense would be much better than taking that would hurt your feelings.
@sender621 (14894)
• United States
21 Aug 10
![](/Content/images/emotes/happy.gif)
@czanwell_30 (717)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
I think friendship like any other relationship must be founded with trust. But I only trust my best friend. It is my husband and my friend in college that until now we still see each other very often. They know me so well, but still there is a dark secret that i will keep in my very soul and will never ever tell them as long as i live till the day I die. What i mean is.. sometimes you cannot have a 100% trust. Because I have a rule in my life that I usually follow. That I cannot trust anybody, not even myself. Because I cheated myself sometimes in terms of my feelings to my husband.Sometimes I'm not that strong to be true to myself that I don't like him anymore and I wanted him out of my life which is very far from the truth. Every time I'm telling it to him, I can't trust my heart because he can still sense my love and in my eyes, definitely the windows of soul he can see that he is there...
@colorfulseafish (82)
• China
21 Aug 10
in my opinion,friends that you made with when you were young are truly friends.i mean maybe before you go to college or step into the society.because at that time,people are always naive,they talk with you heartly.there are not so much interest conflicts among you.but once you connect with the society,most people have their own thoughts in mind,wanting more salary,wanting promotion,etc.and sometimes some people will be capable of everything to get what they want,so you can hardly have real friends.so you should learn to protect yourself even before the so-called friend.
@deve_annrn (1856)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
We can trust a friend.., but it will depend on what kind of friend is that person.., There are some friends who are fair-weathered ones.., some are opportunistic.., and some are insecure and would talk nasty things behind your back but is really friendly when you're around.., we should pick our friends carefully and I test the water first before I get my self wet..=) So you should be a good judge f character before you entrust yourself to someone..=)
@bitsofcookie (26)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
No, we can never know what's inside a friend's mind because every individual has it's own unique personality, you can never tell that the person you call a friend can be trusted. You can call her/him a friend if you get along for months and if you think that she/he is a nice person, a God fearing and honest in everything she/he do to you, then you can trust her/him.
@kangchily (49)
• China
21 Aug 10
A friend is a serious word.It implies a responsibility,trust,love,play.You have to distinguish what is a friend.If you think he is your friend,you must completely trust him.Are you cheating your friends before?Not once bitten twice shy.The world is more sincere person,you have to believe the good thing,not discouraged.There will be a distant sincere heart waiting for you.
@dollar3235 (2062)
• India
21 Aug 10
I agree with you, now-a-days, you will find most of the people in the same kind of friendship. Life is full of changes and situation changes easily, when your time is good, you will have so many friends and even if they are using you for their own purpose, you will not come to know, however, once your time changes and you need the help of those people, you can easily see the truth in front of your eyes.
You will think that your friend has changed with time, but the truth is s/he was always like that, its only you who could not find what's inside his/her mind.
Mostly people wont mind hurting others in friendship, this is the way this world is, however, we need to take chances and gradually with time, when we have some experience of these things we will be able to judge the good or bad in our "so called" friend.
@juggerogre (1653)
• Philippines
21 Aug 10
No we can never know what's inside of their mind. But what we can do is trust them. A true friend will never hurt us. So how do we know if they are true friends? We will not know unless we face a very difficult situation. A true friend will always be there no matter what especially when we are facing a very difficult challenge. So can we trust a friend? Yes we can. We don't call them friends if we cannot trust them.
@hbsztsyx (85)
• China
21 Aug 10
Abosolutely it depends!
You really good friends will nerver meant to hurt you but help you, Luckily, I got some this kind of friend. I think so do you!
An ordinary friends is hard to tell whether they are truthfully for you. Just be cautious and try to make some of them real friednds.
Only by time, you can judge your friends. So you should keep trying to ask something from your friedns and then offering more to them. If they return you more than you give, you will become good friends. Because your are interactive!
So, never to be mind bothering your friends occasionally. This way is fostering your friendship. You can judge who is your real friend.
Good Luck for you.
![](/Content/images/loading.gif)