poor me

Oh dear i can relate to what you were feeling right now. It is really hard to be confined at home for days,months and a year. I am also like that when i am taking care of my 3 kids. Be patient,that's one of the most sacrificial phase in our life,as being a mother. You will find it soon as your kids grew bigger. You will never knew how they've grown and you will asks yourself how did you managed to take care of them. Just enjoy motherhood dear,you will find it fun and exciting. You just feel bored and feel self pity becoz you think about it. Took away those thoughts,no one can took of your kids better than you. My kids are now young teeners aged 16,14 and 11. You won't believe it,i took care of them all alone,no nanny no househelp at all. I only asks assistance each time i gave birth becoz i gave birth thru c/s operation. I asks help from my relatives maybe for 3 months and then,after that i took care of my kids by myself. Now,i admire myself for giving my best for my kids (not being boastful,but proud for myself) For more than 3 years now,i started working again,just time management coz still i don't like to have a house helper. I also teach my kids to do household chores when they reached 8 yrs old from simple dish washing,doing the laundry and cooking. Now,they can do thing on their own,so why the need of any house helper. Have a great weekend

I also sometimes feel the same way with you. I feel tired with all the work, sometimes even I do not have time for myself. I also sometimes feel like a robot, which should be ready to run the command. I tried to sincere, in doing all the work, because many people say, the job weight, will be mild, if done with sincerity. But I still feel all the work was heavy. I finally get around to relax and do something for myself when my husband worked, and my children to school. So I have time for myself.

i am not sure of what you mean that you can't leave. Do you mean that you want to leave the place you live or something similar? It is not very safe to lose an atm card. You should call your bank and tell them that you lost it so nobody can steal monney from your bank account. It sounds like you are having a very difficult time. How about finding a part time job? You can earn some monney to put your children in daycare while you work and save up the extra monney. Your husband should help you out too.

get some breathing space... otherwise, vertigo will set in... finding a good breathing space does not necessarily require money, dear... you can always walk... it's even good for your health...

I know exactly how you feel. I felt like you do a few months ago because at that time, my insurance endowment has not matured yet. Now I am feeling better financially because I have a little to spend and not depending on my husbands money all of the time. I see that you are promoting triond which means you are earning money. My advice is to save every bit that you can. As much as possible do not use your money to spend on the kids, use your husbands. Its important that you have your own money so that if you need such a break, you can afford to. My mistake is that for some reason i told my husband that my endowment has matured. if you have saved enough money in future, do not tell him you have this money. Or if he ask you, tell him that you have only a little. I am sorry but to me your husband seem to be like my husband and if he knows that you have some money, he will try to avoid paying. I hate the 'dishonesty' but he is also not telling me everything so I am learning to be deceptive about my money as well. Empower yourself and with money, you can do that. In future when I think my 16mth old baby can be less dependent on me, I am taking up courses with the money I have saved. I know that this will be a difficult task on saving money but even if you start with a little, you will have some in future. Start saving now and look forward to change your future.

hi there eurekafemme, u know what? we're in the same dilemna.i understand you. im married with two kids. 3 years ago i decided to stop from my work because my husband told me so and also to take care of my 2 kids. whew!now, i'm so exhausted and feel so bored in my daily chores..

Is your child now better? I read that one child is slightly sick in your other response. When you have finished your household chores and the children are playing try and occupy yourself by reading .THere is no substitute to reading.CHoose some books for which you have a taste. If it IS 'Fairy Tales' or children's stories too it is ok.THey would prove an ideal diversion and later you cAN also enact them out for your kids.Do you have space for a garden/ Or for some plants? THese are things which will prove good diversions even when you are not able to go out.

I remember feeling like that when my kids were little. I didn't have a car and I felt trapped in my home. I started walking a lot. I would put the kids in a double stroller and I would walk to the convenience store or to garage sales or just go out walking heading no where. I think I walked a hundred miles that year. They won't be little forever they will be older before you know it. Maybe you can have a friend come over and visit or take you and your kids shopping.

Hi, eurekafemme. You are not alone in feeling what you are feeling at all. I have three kids of my own. I have been exhausted all week long. Two of my kids went to school this month. One went back while the other one just started. Talk about tired! Then my three year old wakes up almost every morning whining. This can be about 3 in the mornings or earlier than that sometimes. I have to wait at the bus stop for my kids for the morning and afternoon. So, I will make sure that I find out what time the bus will be coming through. I don't like waiting for an whole hour like I used to do either. My legs and back get so tired. And it is very hot outside. I have been tired all week long. When I get my kids from the bus stop, all I want to do is sit down and rest of my body. I just hope that it gets a little more less tense for me later on next month. I am doing the best that I can, it gets rough sometimes, but I am trying as hard as I can! You can do the same too. Maybe you can try going to the park and walking around, this could help you to relax some. I know hoe it feels to be confined to the house all day long. When it gets cooler, I plan to leave out and take my three year old with me to the park one day too. I want us to be able to enjoy ourselves for a change.

I know how you feel. I just feel as though I never go out anymore and all that I have to do all day is the washing, cooking, cleaning and ironing. I rarely see my friends, and don't really know all that much about them anymore because I haven't seen them for so long. You should try your absolute best to go out, even if it's only for a walk, because any time alone and out of the house would give you the time you need to think about things.

Hi, eurekafemme..I know how it feels living in such a boredom. That's why I said to my husband, that after giving birth to my son 3,5 years ago, I'd like to go back to work again as soon as I found it safe enough to leave my son at home with someone to take care of him. Luckily, my husband is not a full-time employee, so he's the one spending most time with my son, and I trust my husband for that. Anyway, I was unemployed for more than a year after giving birth, and yes, I felt the same way with you. It felt like a never-ending routines : feeding, washing bottles and other stuffs, household works, etc, and the worst was when I felt like that I lost connection to outer world, felt so left-behind, lol..That's why I decided not to have another baby in a rush, as I also want to have my social life back, to balance the motherhood thing. So, I cannot suggest anything but to enjoy the life you have now. Talk to your husband that you need to get some space for yourself. Once in a while, say that you need him to take care of your children for sometime. Then, go out, spend some times with your best friends, do things you missed to do as a refreshment, before you go back to your routine. Hope it helps :)

I guess this is the exact reason why my parents told me never to rely on your husband. I was told that if I do, I'd end up helpless. But I am glad you joined mylot. It does not only allow you to express your feelings, you also learn as well as earn from the discussions you made and the ones you respond to. I have known a lot of housewives trying to break away from boredom. Internet is a big help. I could see that you are an internet savvy, why not try earning from it. With regards to your relationship with your husband, I felt that it is cold. But I am sure you can still ignite the flame... after all, you are the woman he once ran after to. Try communicating with him... a simple "I miss you" might do. You may also try to appreciate him (that's what men loves). Give him a piece of note that says, "Thank you for all the things you have done for me and our kids"...before he leaves for work. Thanking him not only boost his ego, it also makes him curious about why you are thanking him. In that way, you might catch his attention. (Remember not to make demands... make him feel guilty that he has not been able to satisfy you, but still you appreciate him). Let me know if this works... okay?

ohh :( so sad that your relationship with your husband right now is just take care of the kids and you dont spend time together :( if you are not happy why dont you ask the divorce? you still are young you can find someone else^^ dont be stuck in a relationship if you are not happy. it will just hurt you :( you need to cheer up and meet new people^^ new friends^^ also you should talk with your husband and or both try to make marriage work or get separated but live like this is not good :(

While absorbing your kind of situation, I find it very hard to make a comment since for one, if i were to be in your shoes, surely, the situation to happen perhaps is a different one. If, my husband would not allow me to work then he should assure me that at least once in awhile he can give me little things that will also make me feel good as a person, like a good massage, a day in a parlor or just simply a little budget for the things that i would like to buy for myself. We need to feel good also about myself. Otherwise if this something that is impossible to happen then husband should allow a wife to work to be able to help provide for the family and at the same time be able to provide for the needs of oneself. I hope your will realize your importance not only as a mother to your kids but as a person as well.

I empathise with you.It is indeed depressing to stay at home without going out and meeting people.After toiling so hard there is no respite from the drudgery.Please try to locate your ATM as the consequences of loss can be bad.Probably your husband has misplaced it so start the search in all places including his wallet.

Oh Im so sorry for you. What you need is some rest.