I don't mind accepting your friend request but could you make at least one post?

Singapore
August 31, 2010 6:57am CST
I was excited when I see that I have a few new friend requests, oh wow, I must be getting popular!! I click in and found that they are from people with hundreds of friends but zero posts. It's like pouring cold water on me....well, maybe not so serious but you know the feeling....I was expecting something....and didn't get what was expected. Well, I don't like to reject people but I don't see any point in accepting them as friends. I like to know people who will have some kind of interaction with me and not just another name on the record. They have a week on my pending list, and after that, they will be rejected. What's your attitude towards a friend request from someone with zero post?
9 people like this
35 responses
@Opal26 (17679)
• United States
1 Sep 10
Hi bluemoon! I have pretty much the same "rule". I really get upset when I get a "friend request" from people with zero posts that have been here for awhile. What is the point of collecting friends if you aren't going to interact in some way? I also leave them "hanging" for at least a week too. I don't like to "not accept" people, but if you have no post points, why do you want friends? This is a discussion site!
1 person likes this
• Singapore
1 Sep 10
Hi Opal! Probably when they signed up they didn't bother to find out what this site is about and maybe interpret it as another social site. Of course, mylot can still function as a social site, but its main function and works is DISCUSSION. We earn for the things we write, not by the number of friends we have!
@saphrina (31551)
• South Africa
31 Aug 10
uumm, well i honestly don't really accept them. I give them a week as well. It is a cruel word we live in you know. But, we have to give them chance as well. We were newbies once, i think. TATA.
@saphrina (31551)
• South Africa
31 Aug 10
What were you willing to pay me??
@annavi23 (6522)
• Philippines
31 Aug 10
yes,we are all newbies once.but then,what if they still ask for your friendship after how many months but still haven't gained any posts? would you like to accept them?
• Singapore
31 Aug 10
saph, I can see dollar signs in your two eyes....haw haw....
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
2 Sep 10
You know my I treat all people equally even those people has no post at all and request for friendship I accept their invitation... Maybe they want friends by being a member here...
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
3 Sep 10
Thanks also with this response, my friend...Have a great day!
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
You are a kind person, I must learn from you.... Thanks for sharing...
@Memnon (2170)
1 Sep 10
I usually accept friend requests. A few have sent me recruiting mails which I ignore. If they don't post discussions I will not be answering them. I'm quite happy for them linger there achieving nothing. They aren't actually causing me any bother.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
I see you have some level of tolerance towards them. I agree sometimes they do not do much harm, but it just bothers me that they are occupying a seat there without involving in any activity.
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
Hahaha....probably not so kind from the viewpoint of the wife!
@Memnon (2170)
2 Sep 10
I think we all need to be tolerant to a degree. If I thought that their space were barring new friends they would be axed, which is traditionally English. Apparently Henry VIII was kind enough to import a French swordsman to dispatch one of his wives.Such a kind man!!
@Sanitary (3968)
• Singapore
31 Aug 10
U'r the complete opposite of me. I have got only 3-5 friends in mylot, but all of them has got at least some numbers in between their (). I'm lucky to not have such (0) friends at the moment. Perphaps to them, i'm only a newbie, and thus can't be contributing much to whatever they required of others?? In a way, it's good for me, as i don't like such existence of 'friends' taking up the extra space. I will rather leave it empty than allocating to them.
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
All of us started out like that, with very little friends. When you become familiar with this site and more active, it is more likely that people will take note of your responses and add you as a friend. Also you can make request to others. Slowly, your friends' list would build up. One of my friends here is very choosy about adding friends, so she doesn't really go around adding people, she only waits for friend request from others.
1 person likes this
• Singapore
1 Sep 10
Hi Sanitary, Did you choose to have little friends here? My observation is, once you get active, the requests will come in, either from people who participated in your discussion, or when you pop into others' topics or even the casual onlookers who happened to read your responses on a certain topic somewhere and happened to like what you wrote. Sometimes I give friend request to people too, with the same scenario as above.
1 person likes this
@Sanitary (3968)
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
I'm not that active yet in mylot, and thus nobody wants to be my friend?? I don't spend much time in mylot too, only about 1 hour a day, and so i think it's all right for me, to have these few friends.
@mimining (203)
• Philippines
8 Sep 10
good for you, bluemoonpavilion, as you have the option to reject or accept. i'm new to mylot and one "friend" just added itself to my account, without any request or my approval. and so, am not entertaining any friends until my "suspcious friend" gets out of my account. I cant even delete him either. Now, the counter says 3 but there's only one sticky one in there. Is this a program error, virus or my account has been hacked? I wrote an email to mylot but so far, haven't got a response yet.
• Singapore
9 Sep 10
Hi mimining, Welcome to mylot. That's a strange thing to hear, I didn't hear of anyone with that problem before. I hope this issue gets resolved soon. It would be nice if you finally can accept friends and build up your friendship circle. Best of luck to you!
• Singapore
10 Sep 10
hahaha of course human.... Well, I have received several requests from those with zero post, I think I accepted a few before, now I'm more cautious.
@mimining (203)
• Philippines
9 Sep 10
Thanks, Bluemoonpavilion. Unfortunately, I'm not the only one. I posted a discussion about "unrequested friend", and one responded with the same problem, but our "suspicious friends" were not the same person, unless he's got multiple accounts. Well, let's wait and see. BTW, I also got 1 friend request like yours, no post whatsoever... hmm. I wonder. Is it human?
@indahfth (11161)
• Indonesia
1 Sep 10
I always accept all friend requests. It is very disappointing when I saw friends that I would add, do not do anything. I've added a few friends who are still at point zero position. After I add that person to send me a message and say thank you for accept friend requests, but after the thank-you they offer a pay site, and hope that I will be a referer. I thought, this guy just wanted to offer another site.
@indahfth (11161)
• Indonesia
2 Sep 10
Yes, I also sometimes find a friend like that.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
At least they still show appreciation to you for accepting their friend request. There are some who go straight to the topic immediately, send you links of this and that.
1 person likes this
@shibham (16977)
• India
5 Sep 10
hi... moon. i also started a discussion on this topic. actually i am also annoyed by friend requests. after accepting a request they offer some links which i never feel a proper way to introduce themselves with a new friend. its an odd process. so now i have rejected most of them and yet have some pending requests. i shall wait them to increase their posts upto hundred, unless i shall reject them all. i happy enough with them who are very interested in interaction in mylot like you. take care.
• Singapore
6 Sep 10
hi shi... We have the same kind of feelings. Although after accepting friends, I didn't do any sort of self-introduction, but participating in friends' discussions will be a good enough gesture. I'm happy to hear about your views here.
@bounce58 (17385)
• Canada
3 Sep 10
I am the same way. I currently have 46 friend requests in my friends tab. It's not that I don't want to accept them, I also just want to see some discussions or responses from them and see if they sound sensible. So, for those that I don't see anything yet, they remain there 'pending'. For the ones that may have been active, and I might have already come across with, but still I haven't accepted, pardon me. I may just have not seen or remembered it.
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
I want to be No. 47 on your list I don't like to have so many pending, and will try to clear them as soon as possible. I don't want to miss out the genuine friends!
• Philippines
4 Sep 10
Hi bluemoon, i just think he is new to the site and just starting the feel of joining in discussions. I suggest you give him a chance and observe for few days. If he don't post any discussion then i think you can remove him from your list.
• Singapore
4 Sep 10
Hi triplejazzm, Yes I understand that they are new and might need some time, I would usually give them one week, if there is still no activity, then they are out.
@Metatronik (6199)
• Pasay, Philippines
5 Sep 10
I actually don't really mind them as long as they are not doing something against me.
• Singapore
6 Sep 10
I think so too, but just keeping with zero post on hold first. Although they might not do anything to me, I hope they will become more active and then I will accept them.
@ench815 (465)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
I'm with mylot for more than two months only and every friend's request cheers me up like you feel. Recently, I got for the first time a friend request from someone who has zero post. I did accept though, feeling that I should welcome the person to mylot. But I guess, you're right. The past friendship requests was done somehow because of some connection through discussions. Somehow, after responding to their discussion, they asked me to be their friend. I did ask some to be my friends because of their discussions, too. I just felt that there is no reason to reject any friendship offered and thus, I accepted.
• Singapore
6 Sep 10
It is a nice feeling to have a friend request and also when we started to have interactions with one another. Friendships build up because of communications.
@msabc1 (88)
• Hong Kong
31 Aug 10
I have zero discussion posted. I had made a friend request to someone but she ignored / rejected me. I think may be she got the same feeling with you. I understand what you and the one said think, but I made that request because she commented in one of my response to a discussion. We had some initial interactions and I remembered her avatar because I think that she is really helpful, friendly and patient. Then I saw her again in another discussion, I made the friend request. But I was rejected.
• Singapore
31 Aug 10
Hi msabc, Welcome to mylot! I don't mean people who didn't post any discussion but have some activities...like you have (28), if you invite me, I will surely accept you, it's only those (0) that I'm complaining about! I guess different people have different criteria for accepting friend request. There's someone above who said that a person have to make 100 posts before he/she will accept that person as a friend.
@msabc1 (88)
• Hong Kong
31 Aug 10
Thank you for your understanding. I have just sent my invitation to you. ^_^
• Singapore
31 Aug 10
Thanks for the request. Hope we will have many good discussions together in future.
• Philippines
1 Sep 10
i don't really mind if they post or not as long as they don't have bad intentions in me or something like that,,, besides, its not my loss for not interacting with me,,, but its also sad at times that you made an effort to accept them and by any means, didn't even bother visit or comment on your discussions,,, ^^
• Singapore
1 Sep 10
Yes, it's their own loss and they have missed out the wonderful opportunity to make earnings here, maybe better than the sites they are trying to promote.
• Philippines
2 Sep 10
yep,,, ^^ hehehehehe,,, happy mylotting,,, ^^
• India
1 Sep 10
I too don’t like to reject friends request…I accept whoever sends me a request but after sometime, I do go back and chk…if that person hasn’t started a single discussion or has been totally inactive, I delete that person…no point in increasing the clutter.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
You sound like an organized person, it may be good to do what you did, review our friends from time to time to see how they are progressing, and then deleting those who spams or do not post discussions or comments.
@Qaeyious (2357)
• United States
1 Sep 10
What I do is look at the profile right away. If they have posts, either by starting or responding, and they regard more subjects other than making money, they get approved right away. If they are all about making money, they are rejected. I will only wait about a month if they are a relatively new member, unless they make an interesting post during the probation period.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
Qaeyious, Good idea to set a "probation period" for them. Many new members are very interested in making money and usually made posts relating to such. Looking at their profile is a good way to know about their activities.
@sid556 (30959)
• United States
1 Sep 10
I get those too. I just leave them in limbo for a while to see if they actually end up participating in Mylot. They almost never do. You can almost bet that if you were to accept their "friendship" request then they would immediately send you a referral request. So many of them join up here for that reason only. For some reason, they think this is the place to come for referrals.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
Mylot is a good target for people looking for referrals because (1) it is an earning site for members (2) there is a very large community here. Also, there are many people who are also members of these referral sites, so they share their experience and try to recruit more people in.
@paula27661 (15811)
• Australia
2 Sep 10
I’ve had a dozen or so of such requests. They came in one after the other. I left them sitting in my ‘friends’ section for ages and I noticed some of them have disappeared and some are still there with 1 or 2 posts to their names and over 500 friends each. There has been no other activity so I don’t see the point in approving the request. I have to wonder what they’re up to. Will they shower me with spam if I approve them?
• Singapore
3 Sep 10
Hi paula, After letting them sit in your account for ages, you don't find the need to "invite" them out? I just give them a trial of one week and if there is really no activity, I would reject them. Clear off and that's it.
1 person likes this
@cerebellum (3863)
• United States
1 Sep 10
When you say they have no posts, do you mean they have never responded to a discussion, or haven't started any? I have only started a few, but I respond a lot. I can't usually think of any topic to start a discussion on, and after I respond to my friends and interests I don't feel like starting one. If you mean they have not responded at all that makes no sense to me? I have never seen anything like this but I admit I don't check to see how many posts were made. Why would they join and care about friends if they are not planning to participate? Could they be trying to get you to join another site or something like that?
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
From my observation, they did not (1) start any topic (2) respond to any discussion (3) comment on any part of this site (4) add any interest to their profile What they did was add friends, so they actually have a long list like a few hundred friends. These are the ones I am complaining about. Granted that some people like to respond more than start their own topics, they are still participating and contributing to this site. After all topics need responders too. Yes, it makes no sense to me too. I have observed several with profiles like that and it makes me wonder about their motive.
• United States
1 Sep 10
I don't mind accepting most anyone who befriends me; however, I also don't mind deleting them from my friend list if they don't comment on my posts or post discussions I can comment on. I simply do not understand the friend-collecting mindframe and I do not tolerate a spam-only relationship. Yes, I like making a few dollars as much as everyone, but relationships, friendships, interaction is much more important to me when it costs me my time and effort.
• Singapore
2 Sep 10
hi sunshine, It will not be a "relationship" if it is spam only Certainly, making discussions, making friends, having interaction and establishing new relationships are what make this site tick and are important.