Still Single and Lonesome
By Graceekwenx
@Graceekwenx (3160)
Philippines
September 5, 2010 12:39am CST
It can really get cold and lonesome when youre single. Many times you wonder what is wrong and at a ripe age, you feel like "where are the men? man! what else must i do?! I feel like a fruit ready to fall from the tree. How do you console your friends who are still single whose ages are a bit past the marrying age? To singles, do you feel like panicking? do you fear facing your future alone with no one you can call your own? dont you feel sad?
6 people like this
21 responses
@artistry (4151)
• United States
5 Sep 10
...Hi there Graceekwenx, There are people who are married and lonesome or lonely. Your state of mind has a lot to do with it in my opinion. There are so many things in life that you can do alone to keep yourself from concentrating on the fact that there is not another person in your life to do things with. Time is not waiting, so if we spend it waiting for someone, that to me is a waste. What do you like to do? Do it. Find a hobby, take up photography, rock collecting, whatever, make yourself happy. Find a song that will be your happy song, trigger it when you are down. We cannot and should not depend on others to make us happy they will usually disappoint us. Maake your own kind of music. Take care and fly free.
1 person likes this
@jxpasqu (1)
•
5 Sep 10
Im turning 31 next week and Im still single.Yeah Im a little panicky about it but I don't want to just grab a guy and get pregnant and after a year you'll separate ways because of indifferences.
Honestly,im scared and sad at times. But I just pray to God to give me someone who could be beside me till the end.
@advokatku (4033)
• Indonesia
5 Sep 10
to entertain the friends who are still single, there is no other way than to introduce to other friends who are single or soon also asked him to get ready to get married with me
@artnoble123 (198)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
That's a nice comment pal...You are right. I singles wanted to get married then find an avenue where they can meet each other. There they may find their man or woman.
1 person likes this
@MsTickle (25180)
• Australia
9 Sep 10
I think what advokatku is trying to say is that it is up to the friends to invite suitable people to their home so they can meet each other. Family might do this too. I really believe this is a more formal way of meeting someone but you know already that your family/friends already know them and approve of them. That's a big plus in a relationship.
When you are single and young it is sad to be alone, without someone to love and without someone who loves you. It is a difficult time for some females because in certain cultures or circles of friends/family there is a stigma attached to a female who is unmarried and past 25*.
The thing to do is to become independent. Get a hobby or a pet and then you will have something that takes up your time and keeps you busy. You can pour your love and passion into a pet and or hobby. Try to make it an active hobby rather than say sitting for hours at the computer or cooking or watching movies...the risk factor in these pursuits is that you'll gain weight. Try not to dwell on what you don't have. Instead, be content and appreciate what you do have. Believe that everything is as it should be. Be patient and when the time is right, you will meet the person with whom you will spend the rest of your life. It may happen tomorrow or years hence, it may never happen. Que sera sera...what will be, will be.
* Just pulled this number out of thin air.
@deriellevc73 (982)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
hello graceekwenx!
i am at a stage where i had been marred then separated and now i'm blessedly single again. i don't find anything wrong with being single as long as they're happy. you can be single and happy you know if you choose to be. but then, i know that there are people who doesn't want to live alone, thus they get sad when all of their friends seemed to have found their partners.
in such instances, i cheer up my friends by introducing them to other singles too. i also encourage them to take up activities wherein they can meet other prospective singles. being single and staying at home all the time won't give you the chance to meet mr. right, right? so, if they don't have the courage to go out alone to place or activities where they could probably meet other singles too, i would voluntarily accompany my single friend to that place and give her space upon reaching our destination to make her own destiny, you know what i mean.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
i don't find anything wrong with being single as long as they're happy. you can be single and happy you know if you choose to be
this is my problem right here. not only to choose but what to choose. hard though but i am happy too but i don't have to think that much. unless i fell in love.
@niairen01 (1018)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
I've got a sister whose already in her early 30's and still doesn't have a boyfriend. My mom used to tease her that if she continues to be choosy on her suitors she'd end up being an old maid. But I don't think that's not the case, I think nobody is asking her out cause she doesn't have any social life.
I'm already married, but sometimes I feel like I'm miss being single. But I've been single for a long time too. hmm.. about 6 yrs.. and it do feel lonely at times and scary. I always ask God as to where will I met the guy for me.. but then I've learned to accept that maybe it still isn't my time yet cause I'm not ready yet. I learned not to wait, not to ask. And I've been uninterested with love for quite sometime up to the point that I don't even believe in "love" already.
anyway, Suitors started to appear but... they are all 6 years younger than me! IMAGINE THAT!!! of all the Guys I prayed for... God wanted me to be a pedophile! lol! well when it rains it pours.. and to tell you honestly, my husband is 4 years younger than me (at least not 6 years... ^.^) but he is worth the wait. ^.^
stop asking, stop waiting and stop finding.... he will come, he will find you! don't be sad cause maybe even if you think you're ready the man destined to be with you is not... God has plans.. ^.^
@bingskee (5234)
• Philippines
10 Sep 10
well! it does get lonely.
i have a number of friends who are still single and past the ripe age. one of them said, it is just a matter of choice. one has to determine what could make her happy when the right man does not come along. there has to be an alternate conditioning of the mind.
one of my single friends was crying the other day. she has a relationship with a married man. even if she does not feel like sharing it, i know she feels very sad that she is not the priority.
@blue65packer (11826)
• United States
6 Sep 10
I am single and will be for life! I have found out being with no one is the way to go. I would go nuts and have with a man around! I drive men crazy,too! So I stay single! I would rather be single then having to work on a relationship I plan not to work on! I am very dependent on myself and quite stubborn. I would also turn into my mother again if I was in a relationship! So I rather be alone and become an old spinster! I do worry aobut growing old and alone. What i plan on doing is go to a retirement community when I reach retirement age so I am not alone! I was meant to be alone!
@aerous (13434)
• Philippines
19 Sep 10
I am a single at moment but have kid. I am not panicking on what happen in me in th future but it is best to have a partner in life as go older...
It is really good to have partner. This is to make us happy...as we grow older
Are you still single...?
@jennyze (7028)
• Indonesia
6 Sep 10
Oh yes, I am single so I feel all of those you described. There was a crazy idea that I mulled about for sometimes: what if I approached a man who I like in personality and physic to give me a child or two. I am sure I can nurture them without the help of their fathers. That way, I would not feel lonely in my old age.
@nana813 (11)
• China
7 Sep 10
i am single now, but i am not lonely. a month ago a boy said he want to have a relationship with me and we went out several times. but later i found that he is not the one for me so i turned down him. now i am single angain and i love this feeling. because i can do whatever i want. i can do anything alone and get myself prepared for future challege without being hurt and become sorrowful by trivial things.
@asxenon (1440)
• Malaysia
6 Sep 10
Sometimes relationship cannot be forced or rushed. Things will be worse if you forced yourself into the wrong relationship. Neither party will be happy in a unwilling relationship. I think the only way is to join more social activities, maybe do more charity/volunteer works to meet up with more people. Maybe by doing so, you may find the one for you.
@soloandi23 (21)
•
8 Sep 10
You must put yourself in situations where you can actally meet people. if you have other friends that are in relationships, perhaps they have friends that they can introduce you to. Online dating can be okay, sometimes. You just have to be careful of who you meet. I am sinlge, but at only 24 years of age I cant really relate to the feelings of being a fraid of growing old alone. I still don't think it's anything to be sad about. There is no such thing as being beyond the marrying age. It's never too late to meet and fall in love, and there is definitely someone for everyone. Have faith, and patience!
@cjylot (31)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Honestly, At first I was panicking. However, I realized that being single is a blessing. Why should I panic? Always give thanks to GOD everyday and you will definitely not feeling sad and lonely. Help others even in a little way because we can feel that we are not alone and we have responsibilities with each other.
@LetranKnight25 (33121)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
I don't know..If am a Man or still a boy or something....
I never told anyone about this before. Yes, I am definitely afraid and panicking sometimes. let's face it, am not ready for this, i never really had the good experience to get to know a women. probably you were picky and checking much on their flaws.most of the time i think of it, then i would cry a bit, then move on.
@eurekafemme (5877)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
I have Aunts who remained a spinter until the age of 40. Some got married , some remained a spinter...
It is their choice, they said. But yup, sometimes they do have that fear of who to turn to when they too old to be alone....
I don't know how to deal with them, since matchmaking doesn't help unless she is still feeling young to socialize.It helps that a single is internet savvy because the WWW is posing great possibilities of finding that 'one'.I will not recommend mail to order bride to anybody. It could be risky.:(
However, I can say that I salute these women or men because they chose to think of others first before thinking of their own happiness. Though it might not be the case to everybody but to the majority, it is.:)
@heaven_sent64 (206)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
Being alone is different from being lonely. You may be alone but you are enjoying it, the same as those enjoying their single blessedness. There's so much fun in being free. We all grow old, and having children of your own is no guarantee that you will get the attention you need when the time comes. Let nature takes its course.
@Kumar1232009 (1215)
• Spain
5 Sep 10
i have tens of friends who are still single at 30's and i don't see them desperate. i just don't know why. next year, will be my long table and you are invited.
@jamed28 (1903)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
I think I cannot say much about this, since I was married at a young age. but I think being single in a much older age is not a thing that you should be worrying about. Marriage as the old man sayings, is not a newly cook rice, then we you try to eat it and get tongue-burned, you can just spit it out. Being single in a much matured age, is much better than being married with children, whom you cannot feed.
You might be saying, "I can feed them all!!!", well if you can say this, then why on earth you're still single!!! Peace my lady!!! :)
@cinjhoxmyltc (334)
• Philippines
5 Sep 10
It so sad to think that there are people are still single. Being single at your old age is so panicking. It is hard to find man to whom you can call husband and a partner in your life. But I think being a single is not a big deal. You can adopt a child for you to care in the future.
