Unfair relationship O_o
By mikmoken
@mikmoken (162)
Philippines
September 5, 2010 4:11pm CST
My love story is unfair.... (this is my story)
I work in fast-food chain. Then I met this girl. Cute, small, and easy going person. We go out and having night life, strolling in Malls, keeping on date. By the time goes by we fall in love. I introduce her in my family and to let her stay at home when she wants. So we have happy relationship and we arrive in 3 years in relationship.....
After 3 years I didn't expect to come were not in good terms. we always have a love quarrel. I think we can't understand each other. Then suddenly I found out, she had a relationship with a lesbian. I broke our relationship because it hurts. then one time she approach me and asking for a chance. I gave her a chance in order to correct the mistake. And then we I found out again she cheat on me again. Their relationship with lesbian is not over.... Huhuhuhuhu.. it hurts... I never cheated her for 3 years were in relation. It's unfair.
I know it hurts to say goodbye to you love ones. But there is one reason I can't let her go. She support me in my school tuition fee. She support me in my expenses.
What should I do?
If you have nice comment. Let me share. Thanks
3 people like this
10 responses
@KrauseHome (36448)
• United States
19 Sep 10
Personally this would be a Sad thing to have happen to anyone, and truthfully my heart goes out to you. It sounds like at this time you really need to search your heart and do what is Best for you. If that means letting her go than good things will come from it. Because in reality it might not be her timing to want to be with you anymore. If that is it, and you are not married letting her go could be the Best thing for you both. Just take time to talk with her and see what happens from here.
@kyle19 (42)
•
7 Sep 10
I can see the point when people say she just wants it for the social security and you just want it for the tuition fees, that's a possiblity and probably happens in some relationships, but I suspect that even if that plays a part there is more to it as well.
I think that when you say
"I can't let her go. She support me in my school tuition fee. She support me in my expenses."
It's not just because she is throwing cash at you that you like her, it's because of the gesture and the care it shows.
So in that sense you do still love her.
Now, maybe she DOES love you or care for you, but also loves the other person as well. On the other hand, maybe she doesn't really love you and is using you. The thing is that if she didn't care for you and love you still, she probably wouldn't still be supporting you financially or have asked for a second chance.
So at the end of the day, she asked you for a second chance and she couldn't uphold her promise to you. Then she hurt you more by having a full relationship with her, AGAIN. She succumed to temptation over and over DESPITE the fact that she knew it would HURT you. Does she really care for you that much, if she would do that to you? Someone who truly loves someone would never dream of hurting someone like that however tempted they were. It's obvious that you truly love her. It's obvious that she loves you... to some EXTENT. But obviously not nearly as much as you love her; she has a lot of love for you but it is very limited unlike yours.
Maybe she is a good friend, but maybe not the right choice nor reliable enough to be in a relationship with you.
She's got a lot to answer you for... but you've really no reason to trust her with a relationship ever again.
When it comes to revenge, that's up to you and who you are I suppose. You can make it worse and try and hurt her back and basically play her game of betrayal and sink to her level in revenge or you can show you're better than her to the very end and
just end it and find someone better and more deserving of your love; someone more trustworthy. It really depends who you are. It's the good old light or dark, good or bad, devil or goodguy decision. :P
Maybe if you talk you can both still be friends, then again in most cases it hurts too much and people just fight and fall out. Not unheard of though :)
Maybe you could also just approach her with a simple ultimatum: You or her lesbian friend. But you'd really have to show your distrust about it and that you were serious it was her last and final chance. Depends if you've had enough of this or if you're prepared to risk it one more time and trust her one more time. I just advise you DON'T get suckered into doing that unless you are prepared for it potentially happening again. Probably best you don't to be honest unless you feel there's some kind of enhanced trust and security compared to last time which is unlikely. Even if you were to go for it one more time, it would probably be very difficult to ever truly trust her again.
So I'd suggest you 1. talk to her; 2. find out whether or not she still loves you or not (so you know whether or not she has been using you); 3. end it - she has betrayed your trust twice and does not deserve your love nor do you deserve to be hurt a third time; 4. decide what you want to do with your career - either find another way to get the support you need or do whatever else you want to do; 5. get over it - she is too unreliable, untrustworthy and underserving of your love; 6. find someone more deserving when you feel you can
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
8 Sep 10
Hi kyle19,
You know what. I am speechless of your advice. You such a nice person.... You lesser my pain, my problems, my heartaches. That's why I like you comment. I will do the number 5 suggestion. get over it... thanks and have an excellent day!!! more power to you!!!! ^__^
@bamrahkirti (1821)
• India
6 Sep 10
You both are using each other.Se is a lesbian and definitely not in love with you but may be want you for her social security and you want to be with her for your tuition fees and expenses.
Just think beyond that and ask yourself if you truly love her or you just want to be together for materialistic things.
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi bamrahkirti,
Thanks for the comment. About the tuition fees. It's our plan to send me in school. I'm almost done with my course BS Information Technology 4th. My boss told me once I need no graduate in order to raise my position to a higher rank(current job). Maybe Team Leader or Supervisor. When I arrive home I told her about a promotion in my job if I graduated BSIT. I told her it's difficult to send me to school, I'm the breed winner of my family. Then she promise me to support me in terms of schools expenses and some of my tuition fees.
We plan together for our brighter future... I truly love her...
But I didn't expect to arrive this situation. How sad....
@jd107nette (1454)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
OMG....
i was about to say something nice mikmoken... until i reached your last sentences... you said
"but there is one reason I can't let her go. She support me in my school tuition fee. She support me in my expenses."
i'm sorry... but do you really love her?
you know, you're right... this love story of your is really unfair
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi jd107nette,
Thanks for the comment. You know why I can say it's unfair. For more than 3 years I just ignore the temptation (During night life, team building, company outing, my workmate) I've encountered for the reason "Do not do unto others what you would not want to have done to you". And I'm afraid do that. I'm very serious with our relationship. I Do really love her...
My explanation about my last sentences - It was our plan to send me to school. 4th year college taking BS Information Technology. I told her it's difficult for me to pay tuition and some other expenses for the reason I am the breed winner of my family so she understand my situation then she told me "I can help you, I do that/this not just fulfill your dreams, the raise your position to higher rank (promote in my current job) but to our better future. I can be your future wife". We plan in order to have nice future living.
I must select to compromise or to sacrifice.. As of now I'm very confused.
I didn't expect to arrive this sad situation.
Have a nice Day!!!
@sweetloveforeve (13120)
• Portugal
6 Sep 10
ohh your story is so sad :( but you shouldnt be with her bcs she supports you. you worked before isnt? she doesnt make you happy. she is with you and with other girl dont humiliate yourself being with her please. is clear she doesnt love you so please leave her. go work and save some money also im sure your family will support you and help you. please leave that girl. she doesnt deserve your love. life is too short to waste with people that are not worth it. leave her.
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi sweetloveforeve,
Nice name. Before anything else. Thanks for the comment.
It's really sad. But I have to move on, life must go on. Face a new world. Your right she not worth with my love. We plan to send me to school again for a higher position in my present job.
I do this for us, I do this for our plan in our future family. For a brighter future plan.
I can't but I must move on....
I didn't expect to arrive this situation.
Have a nice day!!!
@rustyhalo (103)
•
6 Sep 10
im always telling to everybody that there is no love in the lanet between boy and girl. because the love = eternity and there is no relationship that never ends. my relationship last over 8 years but it just ends like that with no reason. so i think that enough to say there is no love between the diffrent sexes.
peace
@Absinto (2385)
• Portugal
5 Sep 10
You need to think hard about this.
I am sorry for you, what she is doing to you is not fair. But one day, when something we love just hurts too much we need to learn to let go. Even if it is going to give a bad period after.
If you do let go you will see that you will find a way to get financial support and maybe you will be happier.
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi Absinto,
Thanks for the comments. I really appreciate it. You have the point, I just learn to let go to find better ones. We both have a job. She supported me because I'm the breed winner of my family. That's why she understand me in my situation.But I have a feeling to revenge what she did.. I don't know f it is right or wrong..
Have an excellent day!!!
@Metatronik (6199)
• Pasay, Philippines
6 Sep 10
So meaning to say you can't let her go just because you are relying on her in terms of money? Meaning to say if she does not supports you in financial needs it is alright for you to leave her alone just because you don't get anything from her? Is that the reason why you love her just because of being dependent on her? That is the problem with you and as what I can see you don't have a pride as a man just because of money. Tsk tsk tsk tsk!!!!
Well that is your challenge, I think she is not satisfied with the love you gave it to her. I know this is insulting but maybe the lesbian is better than you.
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi Metatronik,
You know what. When we are student at the same time working. She graduated first, I stop in studying for family reason. I'm the breed winner of my family. But then when I work in office my boss told me to finish my course in order for a higher position so WE decided to send me to school then she promise me to support some of financial needs. She understand my situation in my family then she told me, We / I do this for our better future. After finishing my course we got married. We did this for a plan.
I didn't expect to arrive this situation.
By the way thanks for the comment.
@mikmoken (162)
• Philippines
6 Sep 10
Hi fjude64,
Nice idea dude. Just to finish my studies i must pretend to her that i love her. But in my mind i'm just using her. So that by the time came in. She felt what I felt nowadays. You know dude I can't do that to her but I must. Just for example, pretending to love her and searching for my new happiness. I must be a man... thanks dude. I really appreciate.. Have a pleasant day!!!