Have you faked a friendship?

@Lore2009 (7378)
United States
September 10, 2010 6:07pm CST
I have a 'friend' who is nice but we seem to have different interests and our 'rhythm' in communication is awkward. But we keep things cordial and we are friends but it is very awkward, things always end up that way. Somewhere inside of me feels that if I change something maybe this friendship can grow into a great one but it seems to go back to old ways even if I try to approach it in different ways. I don't know if I should keep trying and fake it until it becomes 'better' or if I should just accept the fact that we are just different types. Have you had a friend like this? If so, do you keep at it or have you let it go a long time ago?
1 person likes this
10 responses
mcharney89
@mcharney89 (45)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Having different interests by itself doesn't mean it's a bad friendship, and all relationships have their awkward moments. At the same time, trying to force yourself to like someone is far more stressful than it's worth. If it's too awkward, then it would be best to politely pull back and do it as early as possible before you're in for the long haul; to force a friendship on a long term basis would be ultimately hurtful both for you and especially the other person.
1 person likes this
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
That's true. It's never gets far enough though because I think we both get awkward and back off... and then another email comes after a long period. Hahah, it's just weird.
mcharney89
@mcharney89 (45)
• United States
11 Sep 10
It really is, haha. Nothing wrong with catching up with someone who you used to be friendly with, just sometimes you have to really keep in mind that "used to". At least it's not like five years from not talking to sending an Email... or at least I hope no one has done that!
mcharney89
@mcharney89 (45)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Ack, I meant I hope that no one "else" has done that.
dbeast
@dbeast (1495)
• India
11 Sep 10
Sometimes if it is not meant to be then it is not meant to be.No matter how much you try to befriend someone unless there is this spark nothing will work out.It is nice to be cordial and all but you dont have to fake your feelings and feeling uncomfortable and you dont have to change things to make something right,Go by the flow.Things will change and get awesome if they are meant to be.Being patient is all it needs.Keep being cordial and friendly and who knows you guys may end up being best friends.
1 person likes this
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
That's true. I shouldn't worry about it, I'll just see how it goes.
zionsphere
@zionsphere (673)
• United States
11 Sep 10
friends - stick figures holding hands like friends
This sounds more like an acquaintance than an actual friend. I find that the people I consider to be my friends, are just natural around me, and I feel I can be natural with them too. If it become too much of a chore to hang out with them, I usually just don't. I have faked friendships at work. Sometimes I think that has to be done in order to keep peace among co-workers. But those friends were only friends at work. So I guess you could just call that a "business relationship"
1 person likes this
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
That's very true... co-workers are just co-workers. But you're right, we are probably just acquaintances... and maybe it's best to just keep it at that. It never gets past email exchanges.
AliaKane
@AliaKane (97)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Well, no. Sometimes I have tensions with friends between differences, but we stay happy friends. It is your decision. You can't pretend for long because it's passively dishonest. If you have to part with your friend, do so kindly and politely. I wish for the best for you.
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Yeah, it's pretty much polite all the time and we're not close at all so it's like once in a blue moon, 'Hello' and then 'Take care'.. hahaah.
AliaKane
@AliaKane (97)
• United States
12 Sep 10
You can leave that kind of relationship as it is. Even if it is just brief greetings, friendly acquaintaince is very healthy. So keep doing those brief greetings.
blackcow
@blackcow (2)
•
11 Sep 10
In this life cylcle, you can never tell who really your friends are, so matbe i did fake my friendship..
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
I see... I think I try for a few bits, like right now.. but eventually, I'll have to be honest and let them go.
iamdee
@iamdee (158)
• Philippines
11 Sep 10
I never really faked a friendship because I'm afraid of its negative outcomes. If I can feel that my personality cannot adjust with my friend's character, I still treat him or her as my friend but not a really close friend. There's no need of making him or her as an enemy though but maybe things would work out if the friendship will just be a casual one not as best friends or super close friends.
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Hmm.. I see... I guess, it's just best to keep it at acquaintances if things are uncomfortable.
ObservantChild
@ObservantChild (34)
•
11 Sep 10
personally i dont have the time to fake friendly relations with someone. the exceptions being if it brings me an explicit advantage in a work/society context. like, faking a friendly relationship with my supervisor, or some rich girl who gives me money, that kind of thing.
ebuscat
@ebuscat (5935)
• Philippines
11 Sep 10
For me not because I don't like a person who is plastic like a fake friend.
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
That's good, you can clear it quickly and move on.
frontvisions101
@frontvisions101 (16043)
• Philippines
11 Sep 10
Just because you have different interests doesn't mean you're faking friendship. Although i have faked a friendship before cuz i need to pass a subject. Totally different things. Lol
Lore2009
@Lore2009 (7378)
• United States
11 Sep 10
Well, I feel like I'm faking it because I feel like I'm trying too hard. I didn't say that all cases are like that but in my case, that is how it feels.
miya03
@miya03 (31)
• Philippines
12 Sep 10
most of the time i faked friendship and i am aware that they do the same to me. most people makes friends because they want something from you, they need you and after getting what they want they will dump you. i do faked friendship but not with my beloved best friends. i love them! =)