Should I divorce or not?

I already tried my best to find a job, but failed. I got a refuse from a company for six times. I'm a degree holder but I applied a very basic job, but still failed. I'm a foreigner in the UK and I don't think I get the right treatment from the compnaies in the UK. I want to divorce with my husband just because I find I need another kind of life. He could be my good friend. In fact I think he's my best friend. He wants to help to live as I want, but he just can't get it.

Basically I'm trying to be a writer. I can write in my own language very well. Before I moved to the UK I made living by writng. However now I'm struggling with the English. I need to master the language to write. it's not easy. my husband said he doesn't think I can make enough money to survey in the next couple of years. I also know I have long way to go for being a writer. Also now I'm not interested to work as an office girl more. I like the freedom in my life more than money.

oh i see so you think he is a best friend then how can you both get married? then you think that he is a best friend, you're a foreigner in the UK,emm i think you must try and try again if you always refused by the companies or you can search another alternative job,there's must be much of job in there

Just don't jump from that relationship to another because the next one likely won't work either. You have to figure out what is wrong inside yourself before you can GIVE to a relationship. Don't believe you will find happiness with someone else. You have to find TRUE happiness within yourself!!!!

Many people say you don't need to divorce you still can find happiness. I really don't understand. In nature I'm a happy person but the marriage made me unhappy. I became a grumpy woman that is not good for me and others. I can be a happy person in front others but when I'm alone I know I feel unhappy deeply and feel very lonely. Now I live in a foreign country without any real friend in my life. So I want to finish the relationship and start new one. However it's not easy.

Ok. If you're not happy with the marriage then get a divorce and find yourself a job. If the relationship really isn't worth it for you then it's worth ending, right?

I do agree with tammytwo, no one but you will have to take the decision for yourself. Taking divorce is a very big decision and it comes after a huge thought process. There are many things that one should consider before taking decisions. I suggest you to think on possible ways to improve your relationship than going for a divorce. It's very tough to live lonely. It may be possible that you marry again with some another chap, but what gurantee you have that he would be a better person than your current spouse. If he does not proove to be good than, will you again go for divorce or what. One thing we should always remember, history always repeats itself, in one form or the other. Wishing you a better relationship.

Thank you for your advices. I know it's up to myself to deside. However i have many controvesial ideas about the relationship so I don't know how to do. Now I have no job in the UK and I can't find any hope I can get a job in a short time. Also my husband worries if we divorced I can't live by myself financially and he has no money to support me. I feel very pain with the relationship and feel I'm struck inside.

If there is any way to make the marriage work you really need to do that. The love you felt for each other the day you married can return. It is a choice that has to be made by both of you. Love is often taken for granted and as couples we begin to overlook the other. Start taking time to HEAL the marriage today. Believe me, you won't be sorry you gave it a shot.

We have no child so our relationship is easier to resolve. I already talked with my husband with peace. He agreed we should divorce. But he worried I can't survive by myself. So far I have not seen any chance in the UK to find a job for me. Basically I just write for a few websites and make some small money. It can't afford me to live alone. Now I deeply realise the life is so practical. If I knew it earlier I would use more time to make money.

your advice is very practical but very useful. I know it very clearly, also my husband does. He said he can't support me after we divorce but he wants me to think twice before I jump. Now the economy in the UK is not very good. Many graduates can't find a job, so it's more difficult for me to get a decent job. So now I try my best to do some online work, particularly in writng. So far I make some money but not enough to survive in the country.

It's the time to face the truth! I always tell me the sentence because I think I really need to do something to change my life. I already try not to find the reasons although I can list some, you name it. My strong feeling of the marriage is like I have a pair of shoes, but not comfortable. I don't want live unhappily in all my life. I need to do something to get better life for me, also for my husband. He also wants his life changed. So we have no argument but just left some practical items in life.

I agree happiness is from your inner site. Maybe I do have a personal inner problem. Recently I have tried many times to recover our relationship, but feel it's not working. I think the longer we live together the more harm we will do to each other. The bad things from human beings would come out. I really feel very painful with the relationship. Now I work at night shift and my life is very tough. So I don't want to have any unhappiness with him any more. I need to move out I think, but it's really expensive. Also I totally have no friends in the UK. Nobody would help me if I have something wrong.

Unless there is abuse I think divorce is never the right answer. Unhappiness is a personal inner problem and not an outer problem. Something else is going on in your life. Deal with that first and don't rush into a divorce.

Thank you very much for your advice. I know I should be very careful with it. I'm a family oriental person to be honest. I don't want to divorce. However sometimes I feel the man I married is not the man I want in my life. Many unhappy things happened between me and his family, that really spoit our relationship. Sometimes he feel difficult to choose between me and his family. To release him and me I suggested we should get divorced. But life is really practical. Without the marriage I have no place to stay and no money to live. It's very difficult for me to get a job now.

Thanks for asking. I feel unhappy with the relationshi because I don't see any future from that. Maybe the life is too practical. I have no job now and my husband is not rich man. I can't support him finacially so he doesn't care about my feeling. I told him the life we had is not the life I expected, especially for the marriage I gave up what I have had in China and moved to the UK. We have conflict for long time and talked for many times, but the situation is still there without any change. Before we had argument,but now we even don't have argument.