Just feeling off

I understand how you feel. I love my kids, and I love being a mom, but I feel I am a better mom when I have alone time. I have been unemployed for a while now, so I am home all day. We are now on a tight budget, so it isn't like I can go out during the day that often. When I do get to go out I am so excited I am like a little kid, but I get very disappointed when plans end up falling through. I end up finding my comfort here on MyLot. I love reading all the discussion here and chatting with my mylot friends.

I'm not a mother, but I've had those feeling too. I've actually learned in just the recent year, to take advantage of these kind of cancellations too. I was supposed to go in a couple of volunteering jobs last month which got cancelled the last minute. The first time I was already driving to the place when I got the call saying it was cancelled. Instead of driving back home, I went to a park and just sat on a bench and relaxed for a couple of hours. The second time, I brought my computer and went to a library and just worked online. You should also take advantage of those times too, even if they get cancelled!

First off I feel the same way. I love my kids dearly and would do anything for them and I would never leave them. But I never wanted to have kids. So I kindo f feel stuck sometimes. We never can get a babysitter and when we do we always go to the bar. It would be nice sometimes to actually go do something I want to do by myself. I do wish for the day when my oldest is old enough to babysit and that's probably where her allowance will come in. But she's only 4 so I got it seems a lifetime until some sort of freedom. I mean you can get down about it but it's not gonna change anything. I'd say to you just because you thing got cancelled you still have an opprotunity to go out. I take it you already had some plan for someone to watch your kids, so use it.

i think every mother feels that way. i sure did when my kids were little even though i really didnt get to do much. now they are older and when they are in school, i have the whole day.

Hello dorann, I think everyone starts to feel like this every now and again and while it seems like it is never ending it does end. Most parents probably start to feel this way in the winter time only because then their kids are locked in due to the cold and weather...are your kids home schooled? I am home with my kids all day as well other than when they are in school and while there are times when they drive me nuts I dont have any where else to go so i have to deal =) I would say that maybe even though your group was cancelled maybe still take that time to go out on your own even if it is just for a walk or a scenic car ride, even a few minutes of you time would help. My husband would watch the kids while I went out if I wanted but to brutally honest i have no where to go most of the friends that I have are more of acquaintances and not the types where I would go over for coffee and hang out plus I love being home...my idea of time away from the kids is when I have to run to the store for something and the kids decided that they dont want to go which isn't very often LOL....

You need to take a break . Everybody needs a break. You deserve it. Get someone to look after the children once in a while.

Isn't there a friend you could visit? A library you could go to for a while? You do need the break once in a while and some adult company.

..just cheer yourself up...and why don' you complete your web pages which you are lagging behind...i know it feels many time like that..we need change .... it happened with me many times that at some particular day i don't want to cook and i feel that someone brings food from outside today...i want change in routine as well as taste...but sometimes it happens that even if u call hubby...he will be busy and unable to bring it...then you will not find someone else also and then in a very off mood...i have to go for the same self cooked food...

hi dorannmwin you just need some me time as you are a good mom and a good wife. get a baby sitter and grab your hubby and go do some of the fun things you two did before children as it can be done. or if hubby does not want to go, opt to have him have some time with the kids for a change and you go do something just for you. you r eally do owe it to yourself and dad might just feel in the mood for time with his kids too.

That seems like a horrible excuse to cancel something last minute like that.. but that's just me, mess is normal around here. I don't get away from my kids much either. I have opportunity to. Whenever my hubby is home I can go wherever I want and do whatever I want.. I just don't really have anyone to go anywhere with since hubby has to be home with the kids, or anything to do. I've thought about joining groups but I lose interest so quickly, I may even lose interest before the groups 1st meeting. These feelings pass before long. Maybe instead of going to your group you can call a friend and go out for coffee instead, or schedule a playdate with a friend who has kids that your kids will play with. Chatting with a friend over some coffee will almost always help pull you out of your funk.

Everyone needs "me" time. It seems to me like you are in desperate need of some "me time" Get a babysitter for the night and go out. Or drop the kids off at a babysitter and spend the night at home relaxing. I know you need to get work done at the same time but "me time" shouldn't be work it should be you doing what YOU want to do FOR you. You are not a horrible person for needing some time alone to relax and center your mind and soul.

i know exactly how you feel. i had 3 babies by the time i was 19yrs. then when they all were in school for part of the year, i had another, then when that one was 6yrs, i had another. well back then it was a very rare occassion for the father to watch them or for a wife to be "allowed" to work outside the house. because as you know, there must be co-operation for you to be able to work outside home. i thought id loose my mind. and who knows maybe i did and just dont realise it...lol. tnat being said, im sorry i dont have any advice for getting out of the stress for a bit. my only relief was when i finally got to go to work when they were mostly grown. sorry.

Everybody experience some down moments. Every time I feel low and sad, I just take some time to relax and unwind by going out to the mall and read books. Or simply listen to soothing music. Just work it out and drink plenty of water, women always suffer from hormonal imbalance, it is very normal so don't worry too much about it. Sooner or later, you will be back again to your nice self and good condition.

Well, moms need a break too - nothing wrong with feeling that way. We're moms around the clock - every day and night! Is there anyone who can take the kids for a while - or can come over to your place to watch them? Sometimes my mom can watch them or my sister - but usually they just watch my oldest one, while I usually take the little one with me. Even slipping away for couple hours helps. My hubby will watch the kids during the weekends if he is not working . . . but as I still nurse my son, I can't be gone too long. So I nurse him, wait til he naps and then slip away . . . that way hubby won't have to deal with 2 kids the whole entire time. Also in our area, we have a few places that have a parents night out . . . I think for like around $35, they will take your child for 3 hours and it's like a summer camp for them - while you go out. We also have a place that is sort of like a daycare by the hour . . . my daughter did a few hours here and there this summer and she really enjoyed it (meanwhile I got some errands done with just the little one with me). Anyway, that's how we can get the kids away for a while (and hey, they got to be productive at the same time, so it works out). But honestly, the kids are mostly with me/us anyways. Can you still have a crafting night with a friend . . . or even by yourself - by locking the door at home - or going out somewhere by yourself to work on stuff? We live by a college, so I can go to the library or even the gym above the basketball court as it's open late. I would be bummed if something I was looking forward to got canceled as well . . . hope you get away for a bit anyway!

I think that there are many peple who have off days and some days are better tan others. I guess that there are days that we just feel out of sync with the universe and many ways that we can make ourselves feel better.