Yikkkes, What should I do?

Bambi- I have to agree with the two ladies, if your marriage was already on the verge of being over before jail it is probably still going to be over after he gets out of jail. Now, I do not know the reasons you decided to move back to where your husband was in jail at, but that does not mean you have to stay married. You can file for a divorce while he is in jail. My sister-in-law divorced my brother the second he went to prison and it was over rather quickly. Do not feel guilty because you have found someone who treats you as you should be treated. Though I know that guilt is just a part of the process of breaking way from the old cycle. And as I'm poly I have no issues with the "married" versus not married so long as you are open with everyone involved. If you have an issue being married than your option is to get a divorce. Namaste-Anora

First off, you being married does not mean you aint allowed to love someone else, or to fall for someone else, especially since your mate is in jail, I assume that he was a horrible husband. Your feelings can never be controlled by such thing such as MARRIAGE. Why do you think men/women cheats on their significant other except for the lulz of it?

Oh dear, it's complicated, more than what it seemed to me. It feels like a drama. Ok, so you're falling for Ryan but you don't know what he feels for you. Let's say you send him a message and ask him out. You should ask him some questions about love stuff and those then after that, ask him how he feels about you. If he's also in love with you, then I would say, you can be sure to leave your husband as you already have no more feelings for him and that he's even taking you for granted. You shouldn't waste your youth away. When you have met a good man, go with him. Don't stick to someone who can't provide you anything, seriously. There's no use sticking on to someone who can only offer lip service.

Love lost can never be regained. When there's a better option right in front of u, why hestitate? Grab it well with both hands to create a new future with him. Since your marriage to your husband is not working well, end it soon before it becomes any worse. If u are confused, I will suggest u leaving Ryan for a period of time. That's for u to find out if u have really fallen for him or u are just feeling lonely and he's there to fill the void in your heart. It's normal for u to miss him during the initial stages but don't be soft hearted. If u manage to carry on in life without him, it shows that he's just a friend who share your interest but he's not the one for u. With that, u need not return to your husband as well because feelings do change with time especially when u see him again.

go for Ryan... most men when they go to jail will suck up to their hubbies to have someone or something to cling to... don't always believe it... My advice to you is take a chance with Ryan :)

I would definitely go with my heart. If you feel that you don't have any feelings for your husband anymore then do what right and end it. If I were you I'd give myself some time before jumping into another relationship. This new seems cool but take it slow and really get to know each other. When you rush into things, they're more likely to fall apart. Well that's my feedback, hope it helps. Best of luck to you.

It was a very difficult situation. Maybe you can give a second chance to your husband. So you can be a good relationship again. All depends on you. Whatever you do, surely there will be risks. You should really think hard, so you will not regret in the future. May God give you a clue.

I think that there are two things going on here, and each has to be looked at separately. First, you have a husband that is in jail. You said that you were thinking about leaving him before he got arrested, but now are having second thoughts about it after receiving his letters. The previous responders have a point that he is in jail and does not have many options, so he might just be saying whatever he thinks he needs to say to keep you without really meaning any of it. On the other hand, jail can give some people a "wake-up call" and make them re-evaluate their life and change their ways. I think that you need to determine what is happening on this front and how you feel about everything. Then, you need to make a decision based solely on how you feel about the relationship between you and your husband. Second, there is this other guy that seems great. He might be everything that you think he is, and he might feel about you the same way that you feel about him. However, it is always exciting getting to know someone new, especially when they seem completely different from the person that you were with. That does not mean that they do not come with their own baggage, though, and the baggage that you are carrying (everybody has baggage) and the baggage that he is carrying might not be compatible. It is not good to jump from a seemingly bad situation into what you imagine is a better situation without first making an absolute decision about the first situation, and it is extremely important to not compare the "old" situation to what you think the new situation might be, because you could be completely wrong about the new situation. What I mean is, until you decide about your relationship with your husband, then there is no way to decide what to do about this new guy. These are the things that I would ask myself. If you decide to get a divorce and the new guy is not what you imagine him to be, then are you going to regret your decision to divorce your husband? Can you live with your husband if, when he gets out of jail, you find out that he has not changed? Will you be willing to work on your relationship with your husband if you find out that he really does want to change? How do you feel about the fact that he is in jail, and does that influence your decision at all? I can't give you these answers, but those are the questions that I would try to answer, and that might make things clearer or it might lead to more questions. In either case, it will hopefully give you a lot to think about, and then you can better make a decision. If the new guy really is all that great, then he should understand that you need time to evaluate and decide on your marriage before starting a relationship with him. In fact, he should be encouraging you to do that, in my opinion, if he really wants a long-term relationship with you.

Ya , i think it is your right to divorce your husband. However, maybe your should see your husband face to face and tell him straight in his face that your want a divorce atleast give him that curtesy, then ask the lawyer to pass him the documents and such.I think the judge should ok it since the hubby is not able to sustain a family and nows have criminal records the divorce hopely will be passed.

Cute story of yours. I really liked it. Divorce your husband before its too late.

You can get a divorce while your husband is in jail. If you were going to leave him before he got arrested, why are you second-guessing now? Of course he will tell you everything you want to hear -- he will want a woman standing by when he gets out. Guys in jail are generally bad news anyway, so why don't you start fresh with a kind, funny man?